


I'm Going To You

by xdark_blue



Series: our name, infinite, means limitless ♡ [4]
Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Infinite Being Bros, M/M, OT7 feels, One Shot Collection, idol!verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-10-24 12:46:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 48,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10741989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xdark_blue/pseuds/xdark_blue
Summary: Infinite brought them together, but their love keeps them from falling apart.A collection of oneshots focusing on Sungyeol and Myungsoo's relationship as they deal with various aspects of the idol lifestyle.





	1. illusions.

**Author's Note:**

> keep in mind, chapters are in no particular order and they are not cohesive. there will be different takes on how they potentially transitioned from friends to lovers, as well as typical issues couples face in relationships.  
> this collection contains shorter standalone stories set in idol!verse, where myungsoo and sungyeol are both members of infinite. the content ranges from fluffy to smutty, so the rating will vary by chapter.
> 
> happy reading :)

 

Myungsoo was so fucked and he knew it. Knew that it was his fault, knew that it would be in his best interest to get out now while the pain was still fresh but not devastating, knew that this thing between them could only end in suffering.

 

But Myungsoo also knew that he was completely and utterly pathetic when it came to Sungyeol; knew that since that first night Sungyeol snuck into his bed - the hands on his body desperate and his voice never going above a whisper when he said I need you. If he had any misconceptions, when the pleasure of their bodies moving together and the softness of Sungyeol’s lips was distracting enough to make him want to wish and dream for more, all his hopes were crushed the moment it ended, when Sungyeol begged him not to tell anyone, made him promise that it would be their secret.

 

Myungsoo had kept Sungyeol’s secrets before, but never quite like this.

 

To be honest, Myungsoo wasn’t even sure what Sungyeol was getting out of the arrangement. Sure, the sex was great but that was something that could be done with anyone; hell, he had even seen the way Sungyeol had glanced at one of the other members once or twice. He just couldn’t understand why Sungyeol wanted him, why it was his bed he kept falling into at night when during the day he did his best to pretend like nothing was happening between them.

 

It was a weird feeling, knowing that he was being used for his body, because Sungyeol didn’t even try to hide it. Before this… thing had started, Myungsoo used to cuddle up to his best friend, casually rest his head on his shoulders and hold his arms across his hips. But now, any attempts at skinship were quickly rebuffed, and even Myungsoo had been surprised to feel how much more that hurt. Maybe he could’ve dealt with this, being Sungyeol’s outlet, being his dirty little secret at night if he had been allowed to keep his best friend during the day.

 

But despite how good it felt - and damn did it feel great when Sungyeol’s naked body was pressed up against him, his teeth biting his lips to muffle his moans as Myungsoo drove into him again and again - it was nothing compared to the past, when he knew that he could count on Sungyeol to be his crutch, his support system when the demands of their careers became too much.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo was in a foreign city, curled up in an overly soft bed with too many blankets and pillows, his heart feeling colder than ever. He glanced over at the clock on the bedside table, the glaring red numbers letting him know that it was too late in the night, and he wouldn’t be getting any visitors. He couldn’t decide if he was relieved or if he was upset. He just didn’t know what he was supposed to do anymore.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

The lines were blurring, some of their behavior from their private encounters was starting to move into their daily lives, and things were getting messy. Half of the time he couldn’t tell what Sungyeol was thinking, couldn’t even get him to look in his direction during in an interview or a schedule, so he would talk and play with the next member who just so happened to be beside him. It had been days and he could still feel the raised outline of a bite mark on his hip, from when Sungyeol had dragged him backstage after a concert rehearsal, falling to his knees with a grace that he could never emulate, sucking him down and marking his territory with a blazing look in his eyes. Don’t touch him again, he had said right before those blunt teeth sank into his skin, leaving Myungsoo feeling dizzy, horny, and confused all in the space of a breath.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

It wasn’t until later, when they were watching the playback to monitor for mistakes and to make the necessary improvements, that he realized he had made a heart with Sungjong on stage when Sungyeol was clearly looking in his direction.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

The worst part about all of it was that even he didn’t realize how deeply his feelings ran for Sungyeol until it was too late. Before they started messing around he used to daydream about what it would be like, to be able to be intimate with Sungyeol, and sometimes, when he was tired and he couldn’t be held responsible for his thoughts, he would wonder what it would feel like to be Sungyeol’s boyfriend.

 

Those nights he used to fall asleep with a smile on his face.

 

He had never had a boyfriend before. He had a couple girlfriends before debut and it was never anything serious, but now the possibility was out of the question. He didn’t really care about gender when it came to his interests; he could appreciate a beautiful man just as much as he could a beautiful woman. But it wasn’t the physical things he missed about dating, but just the general closeness of it. Being able to call without having a reason, being able to hold hands, always knowing he had someone to talk to if he was feeling lonely. After he officially became a trainee he let go of any of his old relationships, not wanting it to bleed into the new person they were molding him to become. But it was okay, because all those things he craved - a companion, someone he could trust, someone he could hold onto - were satisfied by his relationship with Sungyeol.

 

He wasn’t as naive as everyone liked to pretend he was; he was completely aware of the fact that his desire for Sungyeol’s attention and his need for his company probably translated into something more intimate than a title of best friend could satisfy. But he couldn’t handle the idea of confessing and losing Sungyeol, so he bottled it up, and kept the smile on his face as if nothing was wrong.

 

If there was anything he had learned from being an idol, it was how to fake a smile when he was crumbling down on the inside.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Once, after a music show win, all of the boys had gone out to a restaurant to celebrate. The bottles of soju seemed never ending and everyone was feeling good, the satisfaction of success making everything else seem irrelevant. Myungsoo was ecstatic because he believed in Infinite’s music, he believed in Infinite, and times like these it felt like the rest of the world did too.

 

He was bordering that line of too tipsy and overwhelmingly drunk, laughing at everything and unable to stop grinning each time someone raised a glass in a toast. He had almost tripped over his own feet when he tried to go to the bathroom, and Sungyeol had offered to help him, afraid he’d hurt himself on the way if he tried to go it alone.

  
His arm was slung around the taller boy’s shoulder, their heads pressed together as they made their way to the restroom. There was a line so they had to wait, the both of them letting the majority of their body weight rest against the wall, unable to stand steadily on their feet because of the alcohol thrumming through their system.

 

Myungsoo was feeling young and reckless, so he tilted his head up, letting his mouth press against Sungyeol’s ear so he could talk to him without being heard by anyone else.

 

I wish I had known you in high school, he had admitted, his fingers digging into Sungyeol’s shoulder. I would’ve asked you out on a date.

 

He didn’t get to hear Sungyeol’s answer, because the bathroom door was opening and Sungyeol was pushing him inside to do his business.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

The first time they had the dorms to themselves, Sungjong away visiting his parents and Woohyun sleeping upstairs on the eleventh floor, Myungsoo dared to try and change their dynamic. Usually Sungyeol would slink in, lock the door behind him and shed his clothes before Myungsoo could even say hello. Then he would be on him, his lips insistent and his hand stroking Myungsoo to hardness, a sense of urgency always present in his movements.

 

Once he was stretched open and ready, he would turn over to his stomach, presenting his back to Myungsoo. And Myungsoo would be so turned on, knowing it was wrong but unable to stay away, that feeling of tightness making him shake as he slid inside, his hips grabbing onto Sungyeol’s slim hips as he fucked him. But this time, when he had Sungyeol moaning in pleasure beneath him, he abruptly pulled out to flip him over. Sungyeol let out a gasp of surprise, his eyes clenched shut as Myungsoo situated him over his hips. Ride me, he asked, a soft roll of his hips meant to encourage Sungyeol to start. But instead of indulging him Sungyeol was pulling away, and Myungsoo instinctively reached out for his thighs, trying to keep him in place, not willing to let the heat of his body move away.

 

But Sungyeol shook his head, his body tense and his eyes refusing to make eye contact. Myungsoo laughed, trying to make a joke of it, trying to smooth over the sudden tightness he felt in his chest. You always want me to take you from behind, it’s almost like you don’t want to look at me.

 

It wasn’t until later, when Sungyeol had left his bed under the guise of cleaning up even though they both knew he wouldn’t return, that Myungsoo realized that Sungyeol had never answered his question. Sungyeol had kissed him, turning back over with a smirk and guiding Myungsoo back inside of him, the heat of the moment pulling Myungsoo away from his concerns.

  
But once he was alone, the spot Sungyeol had occupied rapidly cooling down, almost as if he was never there, Myungsoo realized that he had been played.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

A couple weeks later, Myungsoo realized that he had never had sex with Sungyeol with the lights on. It was always in the dark, always rushed, always hurried. Almost as if Sungyeol didn’t want to be there at all.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

The dating scandal was bullshit. There was no pictures of him and that girl together, no solid evidence to link them as an item. But so many people were pointing fingers, claiming to have seen them together, acting as if they knew the truth. They were calling him a coward, for not coming clean about his supposed relationship.

 

If only the fans knew the real reason why he was a coward, there would be a lot more fansites closing down and the news would be writing articles about him for a very different reason.

 

He could already read the headlines - L; the first openly gay idol, fans break their albums in outrage - and as much as he wanted to fight back, to call out that girl for lying, to declare the person who he was really interested in, he knew that he couldn’t. There were rules that you had to follow, when you were an idol, and he couldn’t let his selfishness be the reason that Infinite fell.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

In the haze of what was supposed to be the afterglow, the both of them panting with the exertion of what they had just done, Myungsoo turned to look at Sungyeol. What are we doing, he asked, trying his best not the let his voice crack with the pressure he felt, doing his best to sound nonchalant even though he needed the answer more than he needed air in his lungs.

 

He couldn’t make out Sungyeol’s expression in the dark, but for the first time he felt some of Sungyeol’s control of the situation slip when he whispered back I don’t know.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Sungyeol had been spending more time with Woohyun. Which shouldn’t have been a problem, wouldn’t have been a problem in the past but now it meant that Sungyeol was spending even less time with Myungsoo. Even if their random hook ups might not have been the smartest decision, it was still theirs. But now more than often when he walked by Woohyun’s room he heard Sungyeol’s laughter, the two of them giggling over a joke that he would never be a part of; unless, of course, the joke was about him.

 

Sometimes he hated himself for letting his thoughts get this dark, especially when they could so easily be true.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo was pissed off because the media has misconstrued his words, again. The things he said were for Inspirits, it wasn’t about bragging or downplaying his role in the group, he was just speaking his mind on how he felt. He wanted to be more than just a visual, he wanted to improve his singing and his talents, and now he was getting cursed at for it. The comments were insane, they were so mean and full of hatred, and it struck Myungsoo hard to know that this many people out there despised him. He knew he had his fans but to know the general public thought this lowly of him…

 

He wouldn’t let himself cry. He didn’t let himself cry over Sungyeol, and he wouldn’t let himself cry over this either.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo got another role in a drama. It was a small but important part, and he was happy to have something new to focus his attention on. He cut off his hair and bleached it blonde, eager for a change, for something to feel different.

 

Some people complimented the makeover and some hated it, but for once, Myungsoo didn’t really care. Or at least he thought he didn’t until Sungyeol was smiling at him across the dinner table, walking up close behind him when he went to do the dishes, just to whisper you look good.

 

Myungsoo’s treacherous heart was flattered, and he couldn’t stop smiling for the rest of the night, even after Sungyeol left him alone in bed alone again.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

They were going to Brazil, to a brand new continent they had never visited before, and Myungsoo was dreading the long flight, despite his excitement to travel and explore.

 

He tried, and failed, to hide the surprise on his face when Sungyeol slid into the seat next to him, chatting with him politely and sharing his snacks as they flew thousands of miles over the oceans.

 

Myungsoo was feeling nostalgic enough to appreciate it, without letting the ache of what could have been ruin his current happiness.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Sungyeol was traveling to Japan with Woohyun, a fan meet to promote their drama together. Myungsoo hadn’t seen Sungyeol look so excited in a long time, and the feeling was contagious. He even rode along in the van to the airport, just to wish them well.

  
It wasn’t until he was on the way back home that he considered that maybe Sungyeol’s enthusiasm wasn’t because of the extra schedules, but because he would be traveling with just Woohyun.

 

Myungsoo tried not to be bitter about the trip, but he felt an extreme sense of relief they moment the two of them came back to Korea.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo’s feeling insecure, because their new subunit album has just been announced, and he’s been picked to be the main vocal, and everyone has an opinion about it. Some of the fans are excited for more music, and others are skeptical that they will be able to pull it off with just the three younger members.   
  
It’s the night before their first showcase in Japan, and Myungsoo is a nervous wreck. He’s sharing a room with Sungyeol, and he wants more than anything to reach out to him, to ask for his comfort and reassurance. But he knows he can’t, so he wraps himself up in his blanket and tries not to panic.

 

When Sungyeol finally does climb into the bed with him, Myungsoo can’t stop himself from saying what he knows he definitely shouldn’t. Do you wish Woohyun was here instead? He doesn’t clarify what he means, knows that Sungyeol is probably thinking that he means as the main vocal of Infinite F but in reality he means in between his arms, touching Sungyeol and making him come. Does he think of Woohyun every time? Does he have to stop himself from moaning Woohyun’s name while he’s in bed with Myungsoo? Has he just been a stand in, a substitute for someone else this entire time?

 

Why would I want anyone else but you?

 

Later, when Myungsoo reflects on Sungyeol’s words, he can’t decide what shocks him more; the fact that Sungyeol said that in the first place, or the fact that he held him close, sleeping in the bed with him for the first time without initiating anything sexual.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

The album is a huge success, the pop up store is selling out of their goods, and the showcases go off without a hitch. They’ve made it, did what some people in the company even thought they weren’t capable of doing. Sungyeol hasn’t seemed to stop smiling since they arrived in Japan, and for once Myungsoo doesn’t question it. They stay up late in their hotel room, talking about things that happened during their schedules and sharing all the positive comments they found about their album online. Sungyeol keeps asking for help on Japanese, and Myungsoo is doing his best to translate for him. They hardly get any sleep, and the stylists scold them for having bags underneath their eyes.

 

But it felt just like old times, like the two of them were finally on the same page again and he wasn’t going to feel guilty about it, no matter how much bb cream the noonas had to use on his skin to cover up the imperfections.

 

When he had Sungyeol’s attention, he felt perfect and that was all that mattered.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

On their last night in Japan, Myungsoo overheard something he shouldn’t have. He was supposed to be out shopping and Sungyeol had said he wanted to stay back and get some sleep. He left his wallet on the night stand in their room, and when he came back to retrieve it he heard Sungyeol on the phone in the bathroom. He knew he should’ve left, respected Sungyeol’s privacy and he probably would have, if he hadn’t heard the way Sungyeol breathlessly said Woohyun.

 

He felt rooted to the spot, unable to leave even though he knew that the chance of what he overheard being good was close to none.

 

I think I’m fucking up with Myungsoo.

 

Myungsoo bit his lip so hard that he tasted blood, his fingers clenching at his sides. After how wonderful the week had been, after thinking they were finally back on the right track, this was how Sungyeol really felt?

 

I just- I don’t think I’m doing this right. I think he thinks I don’t care about him.

 

Myungsoo wanted to scream because why would he think otherwise? Even though this week had been good, the majority of the time wasn’t. There were too many words unsaid, too many mistakes made, and his head was swimming with all the things he wished he could take back, things he wanted to do differently.

 

What if he finds out I care too much?

 

Myungsoo hears the bathroom door start to open so he dashes out of the room, not wanting to be caught eavesdropping. His mind is going crazy for the rest of the evening, wondering what Sungyeol could have meant, daring to think what he hasn’t allowed himself to consider since this thing between them started.

 

He doesn’t sleep a wink.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

There’s no time to talk when they get back to Korea. The CEO decided to promote their album domestically at the last minute, and there’s photoshoots and dance practices and interviews nonstop to support the new subunit.

 

They even get nominated on a music show and even though they don’t win, it still feels like a big moment. The rest of the members are all supportive, giving them big hugs and proud smiles when they return from their last schedule of the night. Sunggyu demands that they all hang out in the eleventh floor together, ordering ridiculous amounts of fried chicken and soju for the seven of them, waving away the managers so they can be alone. They eat and drink on the floor in a big circle, just like they used to do back in their debut days.

 

He’s on his second bottle when Sungyeol pulls him away from the others, dragging them back to their floor so they can speak privately. Myungsoo is terrified of what Sungyeol’s going to say, but he’s tipsy enough to be strong enough to stand there and listen.

 

So when Sungyeol starts crying, big wet tears falling from his eyes as he repeatedly apologizes, Myungsoo literally does not know what to do. It isn’t until he pulls them into his room, locking the door behind them and wiping away Sungyeol’s tears that the other boy starts to explain. About how in the beginning it was just about release, how he knew the both of them wanted something physical to take the edge off. Then he’s talking about how he developed feelings, how it was painful to have Myungsoo but to not really have him, how he tried to keep his distance and stay away but he couldn’t stop himself from coming back.

 

He laughs then, saying that Woohyun threatened to kick his ass if he didn’t come clean and confess, but he’s just been so scared, so scared at the possibility of Myungsoo rejecting him, that he told himself that he was okay with just having his body, even when he wanted his heart too.

 

He says that he wants to start over, without the rules or the lies or the misconceptions. That he wants them to talk, to be honest, to maybe stop sleeping together and start over as friends. To see where it goes from there, if Myungsoo is willing to give him a chance.

 

And Myungsoo laughs too, because the both of them are idiots, and they’ve been hurting over silly things, and they have all the time in the world to right their wrongs. He doesn’t let Sungyeol leave, he kisses him on the cheek and wraps him up in his arms, refusing to let him go for even a minute.

 

They fall asleep with the lights on, because Myungsoo can’t bring himself to turn them off, loving the way that Sungyeol looks in his bed too much to let it go for even a second.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo is pleasantly surprised by just how much Sungyeol blushes. He missed it before, when they touched and fooled around, but now that he’s allowed to do so without feeling like he needs to be careful, he’s free to explore and learn all the quirks of Sungyeol’s body. They haven’t done much more than vigorously make out since Sungyeol’s confession, their hands wandering and bodies pressed up together, doing their best to take things slow. But Sungyeol’s pale skin flushes red the moment Myungsoo touches him below the waist, his eyes shining so bright with his excitement.

 

He blushes outside of the bedroom too; like when Myungsoo brings him home something as simple as dinner, or an impromptu gift like flowers and chocolates. They still haven’t put a name on what they’re doing, but it makes Myungsoo happy regardless. He knows that no matter how long or tiring they day is, he’ll have Sungyeol waiting for him in his bed, and even if there’s only kisses, it still feels so much more satisfying than anything they did before.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Months later, in between takes at Weekly Idol, he works up the courage to apologize to Woohyun. I thought you were hooking up with Sungyeol and I got jealous and I’m sorry if I was mean to you because of that.

 

Woohyun can’t stop laughing for the rest of the filming, and Hoya thinks it’s because of his jokes. Myungsoo let’s it slide, knowing that sometimes illusions are the only thing that keeps people going.


	2. payback.

 

“Trouble in paradise?” Woohyun asked with only a mild amount of interest, merely making conversation to fill the silence in between the takes on set. Myungsoo had originally planned to surprise the two members filming High School Love On by himself, but somehow Dongwoo had ended up accompanying him to the location, which only made his mood more sour.

 

Myungsoo grumbled to show his disapproval, his eyes glaring in the direction of Sungyeol and the rapper. It was supposed to be him taking selcas with Sungyeol, feeding him treats, making him smile. But instead he had been pushed to the side, forced to glower in the corner with Woohyun instead of sitting by Sungyeol’s side.

 

Sometimes he really, really hated his luck.

 

Woohyun pressed tissues to his face to try to prevent the sweat from dripping down into his eyes, not wanting to ruin his makeup. The heat was sweltering, the humid air providing no relief from the unforgiving sun. Myungsoo narrowed his eyes in his other members’ direction, the condensation from his melting drink dripping down onto his shoes, not that he noticed. He and Sungyeol were supposed to be enjoying their Americanos together, but instead he watched from afar; his own drink now watery and diluted, and Sungyeol’s cup empty far too soon since he shared half of it with Dongwoo.

 

Sometimes he really, really wondered if Sungyeol was doing it on purpose.

 

“I’m sure Sungyeol’s happy to see you.” Woohyun tried again, throwing the used tissues into the bin with a tired sigh.

 

Myungsoo scoffed, crossing his arms angrily. “Yeah, I can really tell. Yeol’s hardly spoken to me since I got here, he’s been too busy with Dongwoo hyung.” He kicked the ground with his foot, a pout coming across his face. “It wasn’t even hyung’s idea to come here, and he’s getting all the attention…”

 

“Yah, am I nothing? I’m talking to you right now!” Woohyun reprimanded, hitting Myungsoo on the head.

 

Myungsoo rubbed the now sore spot on his head, shrugging his shoulders. “You know what I meant hyung. I’m glad we got to hang out but-”  
  


“I’m not exactly the person you came to see.” Woohyun finished for him, pushing his bangs back to fan his face. “It’s cool; I get it. We haven’t exactly been around much because of the drama, so I’m sure the lack of alone time has been… frustrating, for lack of a better word.”

 

The visual nodded unhappily, absentmindedly taking a sip and immediately grimacing at the taste. Woohyun shook his head, taking the drink from his hand to deposit it into the trash to save Myungsoo from its misery. The shorter man cast a glance in Sungyeol’s direction, noting his co-star’s lingering hands on Dongwoo’s person, and the overly close way they were sitting together, sharing laughs over something on the rapper’s phone. It was pretty transparent in his opinion, but obviously Sungyeol’s tricks were working on his pathetic friend. It wasn’t Sungyeol’s normal behavior to be clingy or show excessive skinship with any of the members, so it was clear that he was doing this to just get a rise out of Myungsoo. The poor boy was so hooked on his best friend that he was an easy target to Sungyeol’s games, and Woohyun felt a pang of sympathy for him. Or rather, he found an opportunity to give Sungyeol a dose of his own medicine.

 

He wrapped an arm around Myungsoo’s shoulder, a devious smile coming across his face. “Myungsoo, I think it’s time you start playing offense instead of defense.”

 

“Huh?” Myungsoo chirped, his eyes widening when Woohyun pulled him closer to press their bodies together.

 

“Just follow my lead; we’re going to teach Sungyeol a lesson. All you have to do is trust me, do exactly what I say, and by the end of the night you’ll have his full attention.”

 

Myungsoo looked back at Sungyeol, his temper flaring when Sungyeol grabbed ahold of one of Dongwoo’s thighs as they laughed at some joke Myungsoo wasn’t in on. He turned to Woohyun, a look of determination gracing his features.

 

“I’ll do whatever you say hyung.”

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

This was not how things were supposed to go. Myungsoo was supposed to get riled up after watching him be so touchy feely with Dongwoo, drag him to the nearest room with a door that locked and punish him for his antics.

 

He was not supposed to be watching Myungsoo openly flirt with Woohyun.

 

On top of the situation just not going the way he had planned it, it seemed as if Myungsoo was… enjoying Woohyun’s attention. Had Myungsoo ever blushed like that around him? And he just kept giggling, which was definitely Woohyun’s fault. Did his hyung have any real reason to hang over Myungsoo like that? Offering him water, wiping off his brow, hell at one point Woohyun was even rubbing sunblock on Myungsoo’s arms. Which was completely unnecessary since Myungsoo wasn’t even the person filming in the sun.

 

Myungsoo spent the majority of his time underneath the staff tent in the shade but Woohyun still insisted on protecting his skin, rubbing the lotion over any part of his exposed body. Which lead to Sungyeol questioning just why Myungsoo was so exposed in the first place. Usually the visual was covered from head to toe in his ridiculous hoodies and baggy sweat pants no matter what the weather was like, so the fact that he was currently showing off his body in a pair of low riding tight pants and a loose white v-neck just made Sungyeol that much more upset.

 

Dongwoo had long since wandered off, not even aware that he was a pawn in Sungyeol’s scheme. But now, as he watched Myungsoo smile and cheer for their hyung - did he really just do aegyo to cheer Woohyun up after a NG scene? - Sungyeol was feeling more than a little cheated. Myungsoo was supposed to be here visiting him, and even if Sungyeol was teasing him in the beginning, he was only planning on carrying on the charade for a little while. Now he had gone hours without feeling Myungsoo’s attention, and he was growing tired of being ignored. It didn’t help that his character had no more scenes on schedule to film, so he was forced to hang around and wait for Woohyun to finish - and to stare at the overly sweet exchanges between his two members.

 

He was not supposed to be the jealous one.

 

Myungsoo was supposed to be trailing after him, giving him those dreamy eyes and that dimpled smile, not Woohyun. He watched Woohyun wrap his arms around Myungsoo in a completely unnecessary back hug, and Sungyeol decided he’d had enough.

 

“Myungie, come here.” Sungyeol called out from his seat, his frown deepening when his best friend didn’t respond. “Myungie!”

 

“Hold on, I promised Woohyun I would monitor his takes.” Myungsoo whispered over his shoulder, his focus still on their hyung. Sungyeol rolled his eyes, Myungsoo’s indifference to him pushing him past his limit. He jumped up from his chair, grabbing Myungsoo’s wrist to tug him away from the prying eyes of the cast and crew.

 

“Yeollie, wait a minute-”

 

“I’m tired of waiting!” Sungyeol cut him off, dragging him deeper through the maze of the set. Once they were a safe distance away he pulled Myungsoo into one of the empty classrooms, all but slamming the door behind them.

 

“What’s your problem?” Myungsoo asked, shaking off Sungyeol’s hold.

 

“What’s your problem!” Sungyeol countered, folding his arms over his chest. “You said you were here to see me but then you spent the whole night hanging all over Woohyun! You’ll do great, fighting Woohyun hyung, you look handsome Woohyun hyung, you’re such a good actor Woohyun hyung.” Sungyeol mocked the visual before his tone turned colder. “Could you suck up anymore to him?”

 

“I wasn’t sucking up to him, I was supporting him! And you were the one who ignored me first to play with Dongwoo hyung! What was I supposed to do?”

 

“Not that!” Sungyeol whined, not caring how childish he sounded. “Look, I was just messing with you-”

 

“Well stop messing with me!” Myungsoo demanded, his voice pleading. “What am I supposed to think Yeol? I came here to surprise you and you barely even acknowledge me because you’re too busy with Dongwoo hyung. Especially after that kiss-”

 

“It was a joke.” Sungyeol suddenly grew nervous, taking a hesitant step close. “It was just for fans, it didn’t mean anything.”

 

“Yeah, I bet a lot of people say that about us too.” Myungsoo mumbled.

 

“But we know that’s not true.” Sungyeol sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. “Listen, I shouldn’t have done what I did earlier. It was silly but I was just trying to make you a little jealous. I didn’t realize that I would hurt your feelings.”

 

“It’s okay.” Myungsoo admitted, shrugging his shoulders. “I’m just as guilty; Woohyun hyung suggested that we flirt to make you just as jealous. I could have said no but I kinda wanted to get back at you after seeing you with Dongwoo hyung.”

 

“I guess we both acted stupid. How about we actually talk to each other next time instead of fooling around with other people?” Sungyeol suggested, making the other chuckle.

 

“Only if you’re not allowed to share your Americanos with anyone but me.” Myungsoo bargained, making Sungyeol smile.

 

“Only if I’m the only person who’s allowed to put sunblock on you.” Sungyeol countered.

 

“I think I could be okay with that.”

 

“Then it’s a deal?” Sungyeol asked, happy to bring their silly argument to a close as he stepped further into Myungsoo’s personal space. His hands reached for Myungsoo’s, slowly intertwining their fingers together. Myungsoo didn’t bother to pretend to think it over, his dimple prominent as he nodded.

 

“Yeah. It’s a deal.”

 

“Glad to hear it.” Sungyeol whispered, taking that final step to connect their lips. The kiss was one of relief, the both of them glad to be done with the games so they could enjoy one another. Myungsoo moved his hands to Sungyeol’s slim waist, pulling their bodies flush together. Sungyeol wrapped his arms around Myungsoo’s neck, tangling his fingers in the other’s lush black hair.

 

Myungsoo pushed Sungyeol back into one of the desks in his zeal, giggling when the actor almost fell over, but his strong arms kept him in place.

 

“You trying to kiss me or injure me?” Sungyeol joked between kisses, nearly outright refusing to release the visual’s lips.

 

“Consider it part of my payback.”

 

“I can think of much more interesting ways to pay you back Soo.” Sungyeol teased, running his hands down Myungsoo’s back.

 

“Why don’t you show me then?” Myungsoo dared, his hips not so subtly moving forward. Sungyeol took the hint, moving his hands to the hardness at Myungsoo’s front. Their lips connected again, the kiss growing more passionate as their desire for each other spinned out of control. Just as Sungyeol’s hand started to work on Myungsoo’s jeans the door flew open, startling them both. Myungsoo lost his footing, and the two of them went tumbling down to the floor with a loud umph.

 

They looked up in a slight panic, a mixture of relief and dread going through them when they saw Woohyun’s face smirking down at them.

 

“Glad to see that the two of you made up. Now try to make yourselves look presentable; manager hyung said we’re leaving for the dorms in five.” He turned to leave, but he stopped to regard them once more. “And I’m happy to see that my master plan worked.” He walked away laughing, leaving the two on the floor blushing.

 

“That was-”

 

“Embarrassing.” Sungyeol completed the thought for them, the ridiculousness of it all making them both laugh. Before they could begin to fully stand up, Dongwoo’s loud voice booming through the doorway made them lose their balance all over again.

 

“What are you guys doing on the floor? We gotta go! Hurry, Howonnie said he’s saving me some dinner and if we don’t get there soon I just know that Sunggyu hyung will eat it! So stop making out already so we can leave!” He skipped off without another word, leaving the two boys on the floor bewildered.

 

Myungsoo stood up first, offering out a hand to help Sungyeol to his feet. “So much for us being discrete and not telling the members.”

 

“I don’t care if they know. I want them to know.” Sungyeol corrected, an honest smile on his face. “They should know that you’re mine.”

 

“I’m sure that they do; we aren’t exactly the best actors.”

 

“Hey, speak for yourself!” Sungyeol said defensively, slinging his arm around Myungsoo’s shoulder to lead him out the door.

 

“You’re right; you’re amazing.” Myungsoo conceded, but a mischievous smile flashed across his face. “But I’m still more handsome!” He pinched Sungyeol’s waist and dashed away, his laughter echoing down the hallway.

 

“Yah, we just made up and you want to fight again!?” Sungyeol threatened, watching as Myungsoo tried to escape him. He shook his head as he started off after him; sometimes life could get a little complicated, especially when he was dating one of his members. But if it was Myungsoo, then he would always be willing to participate in the chase.


	3. reunion.

 

It’s been long… too long since Sungyeol has been able to see his lover. Myungsoo has been promoting in Japan alone, and the loneliness has become unbearable.

So Sungyeol does the rational thing; he hops on a plane on a whim, just so he can see his boyfriend again. He makes it to the venue early and finds Myungsoo’s manager, who is more than eager to help him with his plans.

Soon enough Myungsoo’s singing Love U Like U, and the crowd is screaming his name. Sungyeol sneaks onto the stage, holding his finger to his lips to ensure the crowd doesn’t ruin his surprise. The energy in the room is undeniable, and there is a tension crackling through the air as everyone waits for Myungsoo to notice the bench’s new addition.

Sungyeol holds the bear in his lap, clutching the soft fur in anticipation. Even though the public knew of his relationship with Myungsoo (he refused to hide his love from _anyone_ despite the risk on his career, a fact that made Sungyeol fall even harder for him), they had never made a public appearance together. Would Myungsoo think this was all too much? Flying overseas and surprising him on stage? Sungyeol shifted his legs nervously; what if he messed up Myungsoo’s show?

But all doubts were forgotten the moment Myungsoo turned around. Sungyeol saw the split second of confusion in Myungsoo’s eyes, before his gaze was taken over by the warmth of love. A smile broke onto Myungsoo’s face; the big one where he showed all of his teeth and his dimples came out to play. Myungsoo made his way back to the bench, his hand slightly shaking as he reached out for his boyfriend, to ensure that he was really there in front of him.

The noise was deafening, the fans screams seemingly louder with each step closer he got to his lover. Myungsoo grabbed the bear, and the two of them wrestled for it playfully before Myungsoo finally threw it out of the way. His hand found Sungyeol’s waist, drawing him closer to feel his body after too long of a seperation. Sungyeol looked down shyly, biting his lip as he tried to control his emotions. Myungsoo wove his fingers through his long hair, and brought his lips closer to finally give him a kiss.

The kiss was sweet, full of longing, and hellos, and i miss yous. Sungyeol felt every word through the kiss, and he knew that their separation had been just as hard on Myungsoo. For a moment, when their lips were connected the rest of the world disappeared, and the only thing that mattered to Sungyeol was the beautiful man in front of him.

They broke apart, and reality started to slowly seep back in. Sungyeol’s cheeks were darkened with a blush as he felt the eyes of hundreds of his boyfriend’s fans staring at him. Myungsoo reached out for his hand, entwining their fingers together to lead him to the front of the stage.

Myungsoo gave Sungyeol a smile, a private one just for him before pushing his body forward closer to his fans.”eLements! There’s somebody really important I’d like you to meet.” Sungyeol waved shyly at the crowd, nervous yet somehow invigorated at their cheers and applause. Myungsoo squeezed his hand, giving him a sense of encouragement to be confident and to trust him. “He’s my biggest fan, and the love of my life. This is my boyfriend, Sungyeol.”

The screams from the audience got even louder, as the eLements shared their support. “You’ll take care of me?” Sungyeol asked, and the crowd screamed back yes. He looked to Myungsoo with a smile on his face. It was nice to hear that his fans supported him, but the only person he needed was the man by his side; Myungsoo. 

 

 


	4. alone.

 

Being alone sucked; especially on August 27th, one of the most important days of the year. It was my boyfriend’s birthday and yet here I was, sulking in bed with no one to keep me company.

 

_I made you something delicious for breakfast, come join me in the kitchen!_

    -Woohyun =_=

 

_Hey, let’s go to the salon for your birthday. All the beauty treatments you want are on me!_

    -Jjongie

 

_Come with me to visit my sister’s cafe! I’ll treat you to Americano~_

    -DinoWoo

 

_Let’s go eat to lunch together. I’ll get you all the meat you want, okay?_

    -HOYA

 

_Want to go shopping later? I’ll buy you a snapback since you like them now!_

    -LeaderGyu

  


I stared at our group chat history, my eyes narrowing in anger. Why was it that today, of all days, suddenly every member wanted my Sungyeollie’s attention? They were perfectly fine leaving the two of us to our own devices every other day of the year but on Sungyeol’s birthday, they find it necessary to go out of their way to parade him around town. It wasn’t fair, I had huge plans for the two of us today, I was going to be Sungyeol’s hero, taking him to all of his favorite places and treating him to everything he wanted. I was actually in Korea with him this year, instead of being busy with another schedule, and they were ruining everything.

 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy that the members remembered Sungyeol’s birthday and cared enough to do something special for him, but why couldn’t they have all done it at once, or taken him out tomorrow or something? These twenty four hours I should have been the one to decide what surprises we would have in store for Sungyeol. He was my best friend, my boyfriend, not theirs, and in my mind that should have put me at a priority.

 

In a private message, this is how things should have gone;

 

 _Hey Myungsoo, do you mind if I make breakfast for Sungyeol tomorrow morning?_  
      
      -Woohyun =_=

 

_Is it okay if I take Sungyeol to the salon hyung?_

    -Jjongie

 

_I was thinking about getting Sungyeol coffee! Is that alright?_

    -DinoWoo

 

_Do you have any lunch plans for Sungyeol? I was thinking about taking him out._

    -HOYA

 

_I was going to take Sungyeol shopping this afternoon, did you have anything planned?_

    -LeaderGyu

 

Sadly, things had not gone that way at all, and here I was, sitting alone in my room in a terrible mood. It was already dark outside, and I still hadn’t seen Sungyeol once. It would be a lie to say that my feelings weren’t hurt; was it wrong of me to expect that Sungyeol would want to spend some time with me on his birthday too?

 

But instead of declining the offers from the other members, Sungyeol had welcomed them with excitement. Thank you hyung! I’ll make you buy a lot! Would I ever say no to coffee, hyung? I’m starving, let’s go! Yayyy, I want to go to Gangnam and choose an expensive one!

 

It all equated to Sungyeol being gone for hours and hours, and me sitting here just waiting and waiting. I was happy for him, happy that he got to be pampered and the center of attention, especially when the reality was that him being in the spotlight was such a rare occasion. But that’s why I was here, so I could show him how special he was and how much I enjoyed spending time with him. But now, the other members had done so many sweet things for Sungyeol, what was there really left to do?

 

The sound of Sungyeol’s distinct laughter brought me out of his musings, and I hurriedly grabbed my phone and headed out to the living room. I found the other five members lounging around the room, but the person I wanted to see the most was mysteriously missing.

 

“Sungyeollie?” I called out questioningly, but there was no response.

 

“He just went to shower Myungsoo-yah. After we visited the Hello Kitty Cafe he wanted to walk around Hongdae, and we got sweaty since it was so hot.” Sunggyu explained helpfully.

 

“Oh.” I responded simply, sitting down on the couch with a dejected expression.

 

“Did you buy a lot of things?” Sungjong asked interestedly, leaning over the counter in front of Sunggyu.

 

“Unfortunately. Everything that kid wanted was branded! Since when did he have expensive taste?” Sunggyu complained.

 

“You can blame Woohyun hyung for that one. We all know Yeol considers him his fashion rival.” Dongwoo laughed, and the main vocal rolled his eyes.

 

“Yah, he should know better by now. Some people are just born with taste.” Woohyun bragged.

 

“You must not be talking about yourself.” Hoya dissed, and the others nodded in agreement. Woohyun sulked of course, but no one paid him too much attention.

 

Sunggyu wisely changed the subject before Woohyun threw a pity party for himself. “What about you guys? Are you all ready for tonight?”

 

“For tonight?” I asked, and Hoya nodded.

 

“Yeah, Gyu hyung thought it would be nice if all of us went out to dinner together-”

 

“No!” I cut him off, standing up from the couch. “No way! You guys have been with him all day, and I haven’t even seen him. It’s my boyfriend’s birthday, but because of you guys I haven’t got to spend a single minute with him! So I don’t care what you do or where you go, but the five of you cannot be here! I’ve been waiting patiently all day long, and now it’s my turn to be with Sungyeollie! So all of you can just deal with it!” I finished my rant, my hands on my hips as I went off on the other members. They all looked a bit surprised, I wasn’t exactly the type to raise my voice or make demands - especially from my hyungs - but they had pushed me to my breaking point! When it came to Sungyeol, I was sensitive, and I could only take so much.

 

Woohyun spoke up first. “Myungsoo-yah, we just wanted to do something special for his birthday-”

 

“I know that, but none of you even bothered to ask me if I had anything planned for him, which I did by the way.” I ran a hand through my hair, frustrated not only with them, but myself. “I know I’m overreacting a bit, but it’s just how I feel. I wanted to be the one who cooked for him, who bought him presents, who made his day special. And instead, I’ve been sitting in the dorm all day alone, and I haven’t had a chance to make a single memory with him.”

 

Dongwoo came over, giving me a hug. “We’re sorry Myung. Not that it’s your fault at all, but you haven’t always been around on Yeollie’s birthday because of your individual schedules. We took turns keeping Yeollie busy all day long to keep his mind off of you being gone the past couple years. I guess we were just in the habit and didn’t think about asking you if you had different plans for today. We didn’t do it to make you upset, we understand why you want to have some alone time with him.”

 

I immediately felt bad for blowing up on them, but Dongwoo always had a way of calming me down. I returned the hug, immediately regretting speaking so harshly against them. “I’m thankful that you guys care so much about him, and I know that Sungyeol must have had a really great time with all of you.” I shrugged my shoulders, looking down at the ground. “I just miss him, that’s all.”

 

The members looked to Sunggyu, waiting for some sort of guidance from him. “Let’s go upstairs to the other dorm, I’m sure that Myungsoo-yah will appreciate it if they can enjoy the evening alone.”

 

I blushed, watching quietly as they gathered up their stuff. Sunggyu came over, patting me on the back. “Even if he was spending the day with us, I’m sure he was still thinking of you.”

 

I whispered out a thanks, sitting back down on the couch as they filed out of the apartment. I closed my eyes for a couple minutes, trying to calm myself now that I knew that eventually I would have Sungyeol all to myself.

 

“You have the stupidest grin on your face right now.” I opened my eyes at the voice, my smile getting wider at the sight of him. Sungyeol looked gorgeous, his long brown hair still wet and dripping around his face. He plopped down on the couch next to me, curling into my body. “Where are the others?”

 

“They uh… went to the other dorm.” I didn’t bother to explain why.

 

“I see. When are they coming back?” He wrapped his arm around my waist, nuzzling into my neck.

 

“I don’t think they are.” I murmured, pressing a kiss on top of his head.

 

“Oh, so we have the dorm to ourselves for the rest of the night? That’s probably the best birthday news I’ve heard all day.” Sungyeol giggled, pressing a kiss to my lips. It instantly grew more intense, my longing for him unable to be restrained after being deprived of his presence all day. I flipped us over, pushing his back to the couch as I hovered on top of him.

 

“Did you have fun today?” I asked him, pressing kisses to the long line of his neck.

 

“Not as much fun as I’m about to have with you.” Sungyeol murmured, dragging my face up to bring our lips back together. He grinned into the kiss, pushing his fingers into my hair. “You haven’t wished me a happy birthday yet.”

 

I leaned back, looking into his deep brown eyes with smile. “Happy birthday Lee Sungyeol.”

 

He giggled, kissing my nose cutely. “Thanks boyfriend. What exactly do you have planned for me?” Sungyeol asked, biting his lip.

 

“Whatever you want.” I told him, tasting those sweet lips in another kiss.

 

Sungyeol moved his hands down my back, wrapping his legs around my waist to pull our bodies closer. Our mouths moved together again, the kiss much deeper now that we both were on the same page. Now that he was here with me, that I knew that he was just as excited as I was to have some alone time with each other on his birthday, the night couldn’t be better. Sungyeol moved his delicate hands to my cheeks, biting at my lips playfully.

 

“Sounds like the perfect birthday plan to me.”

 

 


	5. jungle.

 

Going to the jungle was everything Sungyeol could have asked for. Sometimes he still can't believe that he was the one casted - he blushingly remembers the way his voice had squeaked in front of the CEO when he asked are you sure they want me? - but it wasn't a mistake and the staff were more than welcoming, inviting him on to the show with open arms.

 

The other guys were great about it, encouraging him all the way up until it was time to leave for the airport. Some of the advice was practical - Sunggyu's stern voice reminding him to take care of his image, that his actions reflected on Infinite as a whole - and some of it was silly - like when Dongwoo made him promise to try every kind of food they offered him, even if it was bugs.

 

But the words that stuck out the most to him were from Myungsoo, his best friend looking halfway nervous and mostly relieved when he finally spoke what was on his mind - don't forget about us... about me.

 

And at the time Sungyeol thought the words were borderline ridiculous; how could he ever forget about Infinite, let alone Myungsoo? They were like his family, he was closer to his members than he was to his own brother, which might have been messed up but it was the truth. Infinite had been there for him before the popularity, and they would be there for him after.

 

He thought about Myungsoo's words the whole flight over, crossing the Pacific Ocean with only thoughts of the visual filling his head. He wondered offhandedly what could have made his best friend so insecure. Sure he had been excited about the opportunity to go to the jungle - more like happy, optimistic, ecstatic - but he was sure that any of the members would have reacted the same way if they were given the chance to be on the show. One of the most rewarding aspects of being an idol - a successful idol, his mind corrected him - was having the ability to travel the world.

 

Infinite's world tour was just around the corner, and soon enough he would be going to far away places he had only read about in books; he couldn't wait to visit the temples of Dubai, to look at art in the museums of Paris, to see the bright lights of New York City. There were just so many possibilities, so many experiences that he knew would open his eyes to the world at large. Sometimes he got so stuck in his own little bubble; of the idol world and comebacks, photoshoots and superficial interviews, dance practices and recording studios, that he forgot that he was a 23 year old who was supposed to be having fun, being young and feeling free.

 

That's why he was so enthusiastic about visiting the jungle; not only would he get to travel to a brand new continent, but he would get to 'rough' it so to speak, live off the land and see up close all the bright colors of the plants, to take pictures with exotic animals, and taste - admittedly maybe questionable - foreign foods. And in a strange sort of way he felt more comfortable approaching something like this than performing in a concert; he felt confident that he would be an active participant, a team player for the staff. He could easily see himself being a leader in the jungle; whether it be something as mundane as what they would eat for lunch or as important as building stronger shelter to rest in during the night.

 

But that was what the company wanted him to do; they wanted him to represent Infinite well and to be hardworking. Standing on his own, without his other members to fall back on, would force him to grow in a positive way.

 

So when Myungsoo asked him not to forget him Sungyeol laughed it off; chalking it up to his best friend being his usual, clingy self.

 

But then he got to the jungle, and he felt like everything changed. He chopped off his hair, forgoing long locks and styling products for the practicality of a short cut. He did away with makeup all together, choosing to indulge in the wildlife all around him instead of sitting under a tent getting pampered by stylists. He let his natural skin show, not bothering to cover up any blemishes or marks that he acquired from being out in nature. His previously light skin grew tan and dark; the strong, unrelenting sun turning him a nice shade of bronze.

 

In an essence, even though he was filming as Infinite's Sungyeol, with every change, with every moment away from Korea he felt like Lee Sungyeol was emerging. He was shedding his idol skin, exposing a personality that was more carefree and independent, more like the real him. He was young at heart, curious and innocent, a side of himself that he rarely got to show in the idol world. He always felt like he had to be careful in interviews; all it took was one misconstrued statement to turn public opinion against him, or worse, his members.

 

But in the jungle they didn't ask him silly things like what was his ideal type or who he wished to collaborate with someday. Here they asked him about his interests; what was he learning from living in nature, what survival skills could he take home with him. Sungyeol felt like he was being treated like an adult, like a real person, not a fabrication of a man that was created and decided in the boardroom of the company.

 

With each day and with every new experience, he pushed himself to grow, challenged himself to go all in, no matter what the task.

 

And the most shocking part of all was that he was successful.

 

He was so used to be treated like he was a supporting role, an extra character, so now that he was in the spotlight it was wildly addicting. The cameras loved his spontaneity; often following him around as he poked around the jungle, finding random animals to play with and trees to climb. With the crew's encouragement and his own desire to shine, he quickly became a favorite for impromptu segments and risqué adventures. He had made a promise to himself that he would try anything with a smile, and it made him feel proud to know he was keeping it.

 

As the days went on Myungsoo's words faded further and further into the background; and thoughts that used to plague him at night - what if I forget the steps to the new choreography, what if my voice squeaks during my line, what if I disappoint the members again - all but disappeared in the wake of his new endeavors.

 

He got so caught up in his own little world in the jungle, that his other responsibilities, his other identity seemed to become less and less important. He was so in his element being Lee Sungyeol - the adventurer, the jokester, the explorer - that Infinite started to lose that spot of esteem it held in his mind. The longer he stayed the more he wished he didn’t have to leave; wished he could just become a fixed cast member, travel to different countries and experience the world without the heavy burdens of being an idol.

 

Then one night they called the cast together to show them video messages. One by one they went through, showing special messages from family and friends to lift up the cast’s spirits. Then before he knew it, it was Sungyeol’s turn. At first two other female idols appeared on the screen, cheering him on and wishing him the best. He blushed and giggled like he was expected to do, appreciating the gesture but not really connecting with the superficial greetings from people he had only spoke to in passing at music show schedules.

 

But then Infinite came on, his six members standing together with huge smiles on their faces. Sunggyu spoke for them, his tone friendly as he wished for Sungyeol’s well being, telling a quick humorous story of Sungyeol preparing for the show by reading comics. And of course, he finished it off with a joke, bragging about him and the boys going to eat kimchi jjiigae, one of Sungyeol’s favorite Korean foods.

 

Sungyeol didn’t have to fake his smile or his enthusiasm this time, just seeing his members was enough to give him strength. But then Myungsoo started to speak, and Sungyeol felt a pull on his heart, deeper and stronger than he was prepared for.

 

We all know how hard you’re working, so just do your best! And we’ll all hope for a safe return from you.

 

Tears suddenly sprang into his eyes, his gut clenching up as he listened to Myungsoo’s sincere words. He knew that Myungsoo didn’t have to say anything himself, that Sunggyu’s words often spoke for the group of them, and knowing that Myungsoo felt it important enough to directly wish him well made his heart feel warm and full. Don’t forget me, he had asked, his eyes worried and his body tense betraying his nerves when he wished him goodbye at the airport. And now, with a smile on his face, despite however he was feeling inside, he managed to compliment Sungyeol’s work ethic and wish him the best.

 

It made Sungyeol think back over the years, on the way that Myungsoo was always there for him, always the first person to cheer him on, to tell him yes, you deserve this! Myungsoo was that person that always had faith in his abilities, even when he himself didn’t. Each time Sungyeol said I don’t think I can, Myungsoo was quick to say I know you can. Whenever Sungyeol was insecure in his talents, or unconfident before a new challenge, it was Myungsoo that always built him up - you’re smart, you’re capable, you’re needed in this group.

 

And it never came off patronizing, because Sungyeol knew that Myungsoo really meant it. Even way back in their trainee days, despite Sungyeol being the last person to join the group, Myungsoo always looked up to him, always was adamant in the fact that Sungyeol was his favorite hyung. No matter what Sungyeol did, whether it was as important as studying for a drama role or as simple as telling a joke, Myungsoo was always right there by his side, being his biggest supporter, filling the role of his best friend.

 

Suddenly Sungyeol felt ashamed, because he hadn’t taken Myungsoo’s words seriously at the airport, hadn’t thought about how scared Myungsoo must have been to admit that he was going to miss him, that he was worried Sungyeol’s new adventure would make their connection irrelevant. He had brushed off Myungsoo’s words of concern, and Myungsoo still managed to be nothing but kind to him. He wondered if he would even still be here, in this situation, in Infinite if it hadn’t been for Myungsoo telling him that he deserved the recognition and the fame that came with being in a successful group.

 

Sungyeol knew he was his own worst enemy, and that more than one night he went to Myungsoo on the verge of tears - I’m not good enough, I don’t deserve this, they shouldn’t have picked me - but Myungsoo was fierce in his protests, not letting Sungyeol entertain those kind of thoughts for a second longer than he had to - we wouldn’t be Infinite, if we didn’t have you Sungyeol.

 

So he looked on with wet eyes, tears falling down his cheeks as he tried - and failed - to hold himself together as he watched the rest of the video message. The members all wished for him to come back safe, but for some reason he could only focus on Myungsoo when they said we love you.

 

He wondered if they would ever understand just how much strength he gained from them, even if it wasn’t even longer than a minute all together. That night as he laid in his tent, his members - Myungsoo - were all he could think about. And as much fun as he had been having on his own, he started to think about how much better it would have been if they had been here in the jungle with him. He thought about Sunggyu freaking out over the giant bugs, of how hard Hoya would judge him for doing so. He thought about Woohyun trying - and probably failing - to look cool while climbing a tree or building a raft. He thought about Sungjong making clothes out of plants, modeling makeshift outfits like they were legitimate runway pieces. He thought about Dongwoo laughing and talking to animals, as if they could understand him. He thought about Myungsoo - his innocent, hardworking Myungsoo - going out of his way to help everyone, to keep them company and make sure they were comfortable in a foreign place.

 

He realized that no matter what path he was walking, it would always be better if he wasn’t alone; if Infinite were taking it together.

 

The flight home all he could think about was the world tour, about how fun it would be to experience all the new countries and places with his members. The long flight seemed to fly by quickly, with him turning over all the possibilities in his head. It wasn’t long until he was landing, a huge smile on his face as he was welcomed back by a crowd of his fans. He signed a couple autographs and posed for a few fansites, his mood good and his spirits high now that he was back home where he belonged.

 

He wasn’t even surprised to find Myungsoo waiting for him in the van, the visual pulling him into a hug and talking a mile a minute the moment he saw him. How was your trip, what was the food like, you’re so tan but it looks really good, tell me everything, I’ve been dying waiting for you to come back, did you get our message, did the staff treat you well, was it as fun as you thought it would be, and perhaps most importantly of all, I missed you so much.

 

Sungyeol beamed at him, ruffling his hair as he cuddled him into the backseat. There would be plenty of time for stories later, but right now there was only one important thing he wanted to tell his best friend.

 

“Myungsoo, I missed you too.


	6. destiny.

 

Myungsoo is ninety percent certain that Sungyeol is trying to kill him. First it was the clothes, or the lack thereof, when they practiced the choreo; the stupid, stupid choreo with all of the hands and the touching that made Myungsoo feel lightheaded. Then it was the haircut, and why Sungyeol thought it was a good idea to chop off his pretty long hair was beyond him, especially since he managed to look even sexier, more mature with the cropped strands. And now it’s just his personality, it’s just Sungyeol, who has somehow managed to reinvent himself into this assertive, confident image of sex on legs seemingly overnight, much to Myungsoo’s dismay.

 

He was suppose to be avoiding these thoughts, these… feelings he had been having about his member. Sungyeol was off limits, Sungyeol was not his boyfriend, Sungyeol was his best friend, nothing more. No matter how many times they flirted, no matter how close they had gotten to crossing that line, at the end of the day things had always stayed the same. It didn’t matter that Sungyeol stood too close to him, it didn’t matter that he ran his hands all over him, it didn’t matter that he would whisper risque thoughts in his ear; it was all a game, it had to be, because the alternative…

 

“Myungsoo!”

 

He snapped out of his musings, dabbing a towel on his sweaty forehead. “Yeah?”

 

Sungyeol took the towel from him, stepping forward into his comfort zone, moving it across Myungsoo’s face, reaching behind his neck to wipe off his collar. “Let me help.” Sungyeol’s white teeth gleamed in daylight, the heat pooling in Myungsoo’s stomach having nothing to with hot sun. “You’re working hard today.”

 

“We all are; because I keep messing up.” Myungsoo said bitterly, looking anywhere but Sungyeol’s chest, the slope of his muscles showcased by the deep cut of his top, the curve of his waist highlighted by the tight corset. Oh, how he loathed the designer sponsoring this comeback, some things were just too much. How was it possible that he was covered up in a long sleeved shirt buttoned up all the way to his neck, while Sungyeol was so… exposed?

 

It had already been an obnoxiously long day; they had been filming since the early hours of the morning and there was no end in sight, partly due to Myungsoo. He just couldn’t help it, he had been trying his best to stay focused, to dance each take as if it were the first, as if his limbs weren’t aching and his body wasn’t on the verge of giving up.

 

He knew the other members were getting frustrated with him; they were all exhausted and each time Myungsoo made a mistake, they had to start the dance sequence all over again. The synchronization had to be spot on, they had to live up to their reputation and this was the company’s biggest monetary investment in them to date, so everything had to be perfect, there was no other option. So Myungsoo messing up every take because he couldn’t quite focus when Sungyeol’s hand sneaked over his shoulder to pull at his collar, his fingertips pushing against his chest to slide in between the space of his buttons to brush against his skin, how something as simple as a bead of sweat falling down Sungyeol’s face seemed to be a work of art, how Myungsoo would watch it travel down the planes of his face, falling down to his chest, and no matter how hard he tried Myungsoo couldn’t force himself to look away until that bead of sweat disappeared underneath Sungyeol’s clothes.

 

Myungsoo was so, so screwed.

 

After the sixth failed take Sunggyu had put them out of their misery, mumbling apologies as he asked the director to give them a quick break, his sharp eyes looking pointedly at Myungsoo and a whispered get your shit together thrown in his direction let him know his leader meant business.

 

It wasn’t like this was what Myungsoo wanted… he’d give anything to be able to be unaffected by Sungyeol’s presence. In fact, it wasn’t just Sungyeol touching him during those first few seconds of the dance; all of the members had their hands on him and yet he didn’t care, he could only focus on the one who he should most definitely be ignoring.

 

And now, he had sought him out even during their break, it was like Myungsoo could never escape him. He was jolted back to the present with Sungyeol’s long fingers wrapped around his neck, his nails biting into his skin. Myungsoo yelped, his eyes flying up to see Sungyeol’s smirk.

 

“What? I was trying to give you a pep talk, about how we were all tired but still doing our best, and you didn’t even have the decency to pretend to listen. I had to get your attention somehow.”

 

“By choking me?” Myungsoo mumbled, his fingers rubbing the now warm spot where Sungyeol’s hand had rested.

 

“Don’t look so put out; we both know you’d be into that type of thing.” Sungyeol said teasingly, his fingers reaching up to play with a damp piece of hair on Myungsoo’s neck. “Just what other kinks are you hiding from me Myungsoo?”

 

Myungsoo swatted his arm away, ignoring Sungyeol’s chuckle at his blush. “Hey, don’t be such a prude-”

 

“Stop.” Myungsoo pleaded, stepping back.

 

“Don’t get upset, I was just playing around-”

 

“Just leave me alone!” Myungsoo grunted out, tired of being the boy’s puppet, getting pulled this way and that, just for Sungyeol’s amusement. It was embarrassing enough, not being able to hide his desires, but that didn’t mean he enjoyed being made out to be a joke. “I’ll be in the trailer; don’t come find me until it’s time to start shooting again.”

 

He stomped away without looking back, not wanting to see the look of judgement in Sungyeol’s eyes. He was jealous of him, even he could admit that; he wished he could be like Sungyeol. He wished that he could flirt with all of the members like Sungyeol did, he wished that it could just be a game, pointless fun with no strings attached. But it wasn’t like that for him, he cared when it came to Sungyeol, and that’s what made all of this so confusing. Cause he could never quite determine if it was different for Sungyeol, the interactions between them, or if he was just another member to the older boy.

 

He turned on the faucet, letting the cool water run over his hands. He wanted nothing more than to splash the water on his face, but he knew that despite how refreshing it would feel, it would ruin his makeup, and he couldn’t be singlehandedly responsible for another delay. He just needed something to focus on, some way to get rid of this pent up energy and frustration he had been feeling. He was just so tired of being out of control of his own emotions. He felt slightly claustrophobic in the cramped space, the trailer only big enough to fit a small toilet, sink, and mirror, the little bench in front of the bathroom area seeming like an afterthought.

 

He sank down on the bench, his head in his hands as he tried to clear his thoughts. He wished he could just disappear from his problems, but he knew that wasn’t possible. It was only a matter of minutes before his responsibilities came knocking on his door, pulling him right back into the whirlwind that he was so desperate to escape.

 

The door opened with a loud creak, and when he turned his head to tell the person the trailer was occupied, the words got caught in his month. Sungyeol closed and locked the door behind him, a determined look in his eye. “We need to talk.”

 

“We’ve done plenty of talking.” Myungsoo countered, moving his eyes to the floor, away from Sungyeol. “I need some time alone, I need to focus before we start up again.”

 

“You’re mad at me.” Sungyeol started, moving closer as he crossed his arms. “And I have a right to know why-”

 

“Don’t play dumb with me.” Myungsoo stood up, finding the courage to look into Sungyeol’s eyes. “You know exactly why I’m frustrated, you know exactly why I’m acting this way. What I don’t understand is why you won’t let me catch a break… why you feel the need to follow me around, to make things worse.”

 

“How am I making things worse?” Sungyeol stepped into Myungsoo’s personal space, crowding him in the small trailer. “How is offering you what you want making things harder for you?”

 

“Because you don’t mean it!” Myungsoo said defensively, his voice strained. “You do this with everyone Sungyeol! The teasing and the touching… it’s all some game to you!” He ran a hand through his hair in his frustration, licking his dry lips. “It’s not a game to me. You know how difficult it is for me to be close to you like this, you know that I like you and yet you keep messing with me… pushing those boundaries when you have no intention of following through!”

 

“You don’t get to decide what I do and don’t want.” Sungyeol said forcefully, lifting up Myungsoo’s chin to meet his eyes. “And if I’m telling you that I want you, then you have to accept it as the truth. Stop letting your fear of rejection get in the way of your happiness.”

 

“But with the others-”

 

“The others don’t matter.” Sungyeol stated with finality, his eyes showing his honesty. “The others aren’t you.”

 

Myungsoo gulped, his thoughts racing with the possibilities. “But-”

 

“I don’t know how much more direct I can be.” Sungyeol moved his hand down to Myungsoo’s neck, pulling him that much closer. “I want you Myungsoo. I want to be with you Myungsoo. And if you think you’re the only one who’s frustrated and aching for more right now…” He leaned in, his lips brushing against Myungsoo’s ear. “Then you couldn’t be more wrong.” His hips moved forward, his cock hot and hard in his pants, making Myungsoo moan with the small thrust. “You think that you’re the only one who wants to touch… to feel? I’ve been waiting for you to make a move… to make me feel good.”

 

He stepped back, putting some distance between them, watching Myungsoo’s eyes glaze over with lust with the utmost interest. “But unfortunately, we don’t have the time for that right now.” Sungyeol licked his lips, pushing on Myungsoo’s chest to make him fall onto the seat. “So I’ll just have to settle for making you feel good.”

 

“W-what?” While the words coming out of Sungyeol’s mouth were nothing short of what he wanted to hear, the confusion was still strong within him.

 

Sungyeol smiled, falling to his knees in front of Myungsoo, his hands running down Myungsoo’s chest to settle on his thighs. He dipped them inward, feeling Myungsoo’s hard length stir underneath his touch.

 

Myungsoo was sure his face was twisted into some dumb expression, his mouth falling open in a mixture of shock and pleasure as Sungyeol’s long fingers caressed his erection through his clothes.

 

“It’s only fair that I take care of this problem… since I’m the one that started it, right?” A wicked grin took over Sungyeol’s face, his eyes bright with mischief. “Because you were thinking of me earlier Myungsoo… just like how you’re thinking about me right now. Tell me… did you ever imagine me on my knees for you, just like this?” His agile fingers began to pull Myungsoo’s belt apart, his hands steady, showing his confidence.

 

Myungsoo couldn’t bring himself to answer the question, his mind unable to form any sort of response at Sungyeol’s bold actions. “Are you- you’re not really going to-”

 

“Why not?” Sungyeol said daringly, his smile growing wider. “You don’t think that you’d like it?”

 

“I know I’d like it.” Myungsoo didn’t even have it in himself to be embarrassed, the bulge that Sungyeol’s hand was lightly stroking betraying his true feelings about the subject. “It’s just-”

 

“What?” Sungyeol interrupted, his fingers slipping just beneath the waistband of Myungsoo’s jeans, his pulse picking up at the way Myungsoo’s breath caught in his throat at the small action. “Tell me.” He ordered, his voice firm.

 

“We’re in a trailer. On the set of our music video. Anyone could knock on that door, any minute. We could get caught-”

 

“Silly Myungsoo; why do you think I locked the door?”

 

“But still; what if they find out what we’re doing in here?”

 

“They won’t.” Sungyeol stressed the words, his gaze determined as he pulled down the zipper, his teeth biting into his lip in anticipation as Myungsoo’s length was revealed to his hungry eyes. “But just in case… I’ll be quick.”

 

“What does that me- Oh!” Myungsoo cried out at the feeling of Sungyeol’s mouth around his length, the action startling him in the best kind of way. His hands flailed, finding purchase on the frayed cushion of the seat. It took all of his willpower not to grab onto Sungyeol’s hair, to push him down to feel that heat all over his length, but he was so entranced by the other boy’s actions that he didn’t dare interrupt him. Instead he settled for closing his eyes, his toes curling at the way Sungyeol twirled his tongue around the tip of his cock. This was… way more than he could’ve ever asked for, ever dreamed for; Sungyeol on his knees in front of him, sucking his cock like it was the only thing keeping him breathing.

 

When Sungyeol’s blunt teeth lightly scraped across the head, Myungsoo couldn’t help the small yelp that escaped his lips. Sungyeol chuckled around his length, and fuck, even that felt nice… the vibrations shaking him to his core. He found the courage to open his eyes, looking down with bleary eyes at Sungyeol between his legs, his full lips travelling up and down his length to some unknown rhythm that had him seeing stars.

 

Sungyeol seemed to sense his gaze, his own eyes opening to look up to meet Myungsoo’s gaze unflinchingly; if anything there was a challenge in them, although Myungsoo didn’t have the slightest clue or mental capacity to figure out what that challenge was for. After a few more mind numbing minutes of watching Sungyeol work his length, he practically whined when Sungyeol’s mouth fell away from him. The taller boy grinned, his hand taking over for a few short moments as he gave himself a chance to fully gauge Myungsoo’s reactions.

 

A curious smile came across Sungyeol’s face, another laugh falling from the red lips. “What?” Myungsoo said defensively; sure, he was squirming in his seat, making more than a few embarrassing sounds, but Sungyeol was currently jerking him off… he figured this should give him a free pass to act less than suave. Hell, he didn’t manage to pull off the cool act convincingly on his best days, let alone when the boy of his dreams was sucking him off. “I can’t exactly… control myself right now.” He said pitifully as subconsciously spread his legs wider when Sungyeol’s free hand started to tug down on his pants, pulling them down to let them pool around his knees.

 

“On the contrary, you’re still way too tense. You haven’t even touched me, and if you bite your lip any harder you just might bleed.”

 

“I… I didn’t want to be too loud… or too forward.” Myungsoo said quietly, making Sungyeol laugh even harder.

 

“Myungsoo… you realize that I’m in the middle of giving you a blowjob… I think we’re past the point of you being too ‘forward’. Just relax. Let me show you how much I like you. Actually try to enjoy what’s happening instead of worrying about making a mistake or offending me.” His smile was genuine, his cheek resting against Myungsoo’s bare thigh as he stared up at him. “Trust me; it’s way more fun when you participate.”

 

“O-okay.” Myungsoo stuttered, forcing his hands to let go of the edge of the seat. He reached hesitantly for Sungyeol’s hair, the slight nod from below him encouraging him to go for it. He let out a small sigh when his fingers pushed through the short hair to rest at the back of Sungyeol’s neck.

 

“Try not to mess up the mohawk, or the stylist noona will ask questions you won’t be able to answer.” Sungyeol teased, winking at Myungsoo to try to settle his nerves. “And as for the noise, don’t worry; I’ve got a plan.” Before Myungsoo could ask for details Sungyeol was already moving forward, his lips dragging agonizingly slow from the base to the tip. His tongue flickered out for just a second, catching the small bead of precome leaking down the edge of Myungsoo’s hardness.

 

“Sungyeol…”

 

“Enjoy it.” Sungyeol pulled away for a short second to order Myungsoo to relax, before going right back to his previous task, this time taking Myungsoo’s length between his lips to suck it into his warm mouth. Myungsoo let himself moan with no restraint, his volume even catching himself off guard. Sungyeol looked nothing short of pleased with himself, his gaze victorious and satisfied as he watched Myungsoo start to fall apart.

 

He increased the pressure of his mouth around Myungsoo’s cock, his hand stroking any part of Myungsoo’s impressive length that he couldn’t take in. His other arm reached up, his fingers tapping against Myungsoo’s lips to ask for an entrance. Myungsoo blinked at him in confusion, making Sungyeol roll his eyes.

 

“You want to stay quiet, don’t you?”

 

Myungsoo nodded dumbly, opening up his mouth to let the long fingers slip through. Sungyeol moaned around his length, his eyes growing darker with lust as he watch Myungsoo take the fingers in. He moved them in and out, matching the rhythm of his mouth below Myungsoo’s waist, the heat of the moment starting to get to him.

 

If Myungsoo could’ve spoke at the moment he probably would’ve cursed, this turn of events turning him on more than he could have ever thought. There was something about his mouth being full because of Sungyeol that just set his body on fire, and if he was honest with himself he knew it was because he wished that he could have a very different body part of Sungyeol inside of his mouth. Just the thought of being able to return the favor some day, to have Sungyeol spread out underneath of him, to be the one in control, to be the one making Sungyeol scream...

 

His other hand flew up to Sungyeol’s wrist, pulling out Sungyeol’s fingers with a wet pop. “Fuck… Sungyeol… I’m gonna come.” He pressed his lips to Sungyeol’s palm, his breathing picking up. “If you keep doing that I’m gonna come.”

 

The words didn’t deter Sungyeol in the slightest, if anything they only spurred him on. He took Myungsoo as far in as he could, the tip of his cock brushing against the back of his throat. Myungsoo was the one who choked, the tightness and the heat too much for him to handle. With a strangled cry of Sungyeol’s name he came, the strength of his orgasm nearly making him dizzy. Sungyeol stayed locked in place, his eyelids fluttering with the effort as he swallowed down Myungsoo’s climax. The younger boy went boneless in front of him, every ounce of his tension melting away with the afterglow.

 

Sungyeol pulled away, dropping one last wet kiss to the tip of Myungsoo’s cock, the other boy still sensitive and blissed out enough to moan. “The was kind of the point Myungsoo.”

 

“Huh?” Myungsoo murmured, his lids heavy and his body lax.

 

Sungyeol shook his head, pulling Myungsoo’s jeans back up with a smile. He found it kind of cute that orgasms rendered the visual useless. “Nevermind.” He whispered, doing his best to make Myungsoo look presentable again. When he finally had Myungsoo’s clothes straightened out he stood back up, looking at the mess he had made of the man below him with a pleased grin. He reached out for Myungsoo’s mouth, his thumb tracing the fullness of his lower lip.

 

The touch was enough to make Myungsoo open up his eyes, his current position putting him right at eye level with what must have been an uncomfortable situation in Sungyeol’s pants. “Wait-” He started, trying to sit up. He motioned towards Sungyeol’s erection, his lips twisting into a frown. “I didn’t help you.” He said, staring at Sungyeol with hardly concealed longing.

 

“There’s no time.” Sungyeol stated regretfully, pulling on Myungsoo’s hands to make him stand up. “But.”

 

“But?” Myungsoo whispered hopefully, his eyes dropping down to stare at Sungyeol’s swollen lips.

 

“If you finish up the rest of the shoot with no more mistakes… I’ll let you return the favor when we get back to the the hotel room.” He shifted closer, his arms reaching around Myungsoo’s neck to rest on his shoulders. “And then some.”

 

“S-some?” Myungsoo licked his lips, his mind spinning with the possibilities. He gulped when Sungyeol leaned down to place his lips right next to his ear, his whispered words hot and dirty and everything Myungsoo could ever possibly want as he painted a very vivid, very pleasurable future for the evening. Sungyeol’s ideas of a reward seemed to come straight out of Myungsoo’s favorite fantasies, and he had never felt more determined to perform well.

 

Sungyeol leaned back with a smirk, his eyes meeting Myungsoo’s daringly. “Does that sound like something you’d be interested in?”

 

Myungsoo nodded his head sharply, his mind filled with very delightful images of a very naked Sungyeol in his bed. “Yeah...”

 

“Good to know we’re on the same page.” Sungyeol grinned, his fingers pushing Myungsoo’s face closer. “You ready to claim that kiss you’ve been dying to give me for the past three years?”

 

“Shut up.” Myungsoo didn’t even try to deny it, the prospect too tempting to pass up, especially for a silly thing like his pride. He glanced up into Sungyeol’s eyes and the look he found there seemed to be dare him to take that last step. It was sort of ridiculous, considering that they had just done something so much more intense than kissing. But this felt more intimate, more solidifying of the change in their relationship. He reached out for Sungyeol’s hips, pulling him close roughly, making the other boy raise a brow in amusement. But he rose to the challenge, connecting their lips with an enthusiasm that couldn’t be faked.

 

Sungyeol returned the kiss with just as much fervor, moaning when Myungsoo pushed his back to the wall of the trailer, the passion seeming to heat up the very air around them. They only pulled away when the need for air became vital, their chests heaving and their lips bruised. Myungsoo raised a hand to Sungyeol’s mouth, his fingers pulling the wet lips apart. “You’ve been driving me crazy… and I’ll get my revenge tonight.”

 

Sungyeol opened his mouth further, purposely licking Myungsoo’s fingers. “I so look forward to it.” He suddenly bit down, catching Myungsoo’s fingertips. The visual made a noise of shock at the slight pain, but it only made Sungyeol smile harder. “But you’ll have to prove yourself first; I’ll be watching you very closely so try not to mess up.”

 

He slid out of the trailer with one last laugh, leaving Myungsoo staring after him. The visual couldn’t help but laugh too; the rest of the day was going to be nothing short of interesting.

 

He had never been more motivated to perform in his career.

 


	7. longing.

Myungsoo is always busy. It’s not his fault that he is so beautiful, so wanted by others in the industry. And in his head, Sungyeol understands that as the most popular member in Infinite, Myungsoo won’t always be able to be there for him.

But that doesn’t mean his heart does.

It’s another anniversary missed, another milestone passed in their relationship that Sungyeol spends alone. Myungsoo is in Japan (again) and he isn’t able to spend the occasion with his lover (again). _Happy 100 days._ Of what? Loneliness? Longing?

Sungyeol is stubborn, so when he feels his eyes start to water he fights it. He told himself he would not cry today, no matter how much he missed Myungsoo. Because that was the thing. Even if he only got to spend half of those 100 days with Myungsoo, it was still worth it.

"Why do you do that?" Sungyeol’s head lifted at the voice, and he noticed Sunggyu standing in his doorway, an all too knowing look at his face. "Why do you pretend that it doesn’t hurt you to miss him?"

Normally, Sungyeol would try to cover it up. Maybe with a joke or a biting remark for the leader to mind his own business. But today… today is the hundredth day of a relationship that he wants so badly to work out, and yet sometimes he feels like he is the only one in it. His lip is quivering and he has to look down at his lap because it scary to say the next words.

 _“_ Hyung… it hurts… my heart _hurts._ " And the tears are falling so quickly, but Sunggyu is there to wipe them away. Sunggyu wraps his arms around the younger’s lanky frame, pulling him close to feel his warmth.

"I’m right here Yeol-ah. I’m right here." Sunggyu buries his face into the other’s neck, lets Sungyeol feel his warm breath on his skin so he will know he isn’t alone. Sungyeol, who claims to dislike skinship, just pulls his leader closer; wraps his arms around him tighter to relish in his embrace.

"I know it’s hard for you Yeol-ah, but it’s hard for him too." Sungyeol nodded, because he _knew_ that. Myungsoo didn’t have any of the members in Japan to lean on when things got rough. Sungyeol _knew_ that. But Sungyeol had always been emotional, and at times like these his sadness got the best of him.

Sunggyu held on to his face, bringing his chin down to make eye contact with him. “From now on, come to me when you feel this way. I don’t like thinking about you suffering like this. Promise me?”

Sungyeol nodded meekly, feeling somewhat childish for not doing that in the first place. Sunggyu had an open door policy for his members, and was always willing to help when the stress of their lives became too much. Sungyeol let himself indulge in the leader’s embrace for awhile, until the weight on his heart began to feel a little bit lighter.

"God, I thought Myungsoo was the koala of the group. Could you latch on any harder?" Sunggyu laughed at Sungyeol’s words, because he knew if the younger was being snarky again that he would be okay.

Sunggyu playfully ruffled Sungyeol’s hair, before detaching himself to leave the other in peace. “Myungsoo wanted me to give this to you today.”

Sungyeol’s head shoot up, eyes wide at the news of a present, that Myungsoo cared and remembered even though he was thousands of miles away. His hand shook as he reached out for it, clutching the photograph desperately.

He didn’t even notice Sunggyu leave the room, his attention purely focused on the picture in front of him. It was of the Han River, no doubt captured by the lens of Myungsoo’s camera. The water looked peaceful, and judging by the lighting it must have been taken after midnight. The image was absolutely beautiful, but it was nothing compared to the words on the back. He recognized the neat handwriting of his lover.

 _Yeollie_ ♥

_We shared our first kiss here, 100 days ago underneath the moonlight. Promise me that on our 1000th day, you’ll kiss me with just as much passion as you did then?_

_With everything that I am, I love you._

Sungyeol felt the tears building up in his eyes again, but this time he didn’t try to hold them back. These tears were happy ones. He ran his fingertips over the photograph with care _,_ whispering an _I love you too._

Sunggyu stood outside the door, shutting it quietly with a smile on his face. His fingers traveled over his screen, dialing a familiar number. After all, the person on the other line demanded daily check-ins about his boyfriend’s well being. The latter answered after a couple of rings.

"Soo? I just gave your present to him. And trust me, he’s going to be okay."

 


	8. thief.

 

Sungyeol considers himself to be a reasonable person. As he’s gotten older he’s found that he’s learned to be more patient, especially with his members. Granted it’s become much easier now that he doesn’t have to share his bedroom, the ability to have some privacy making him much more lenient than when their shared apartment was more like a glorified room.

 

Which is why his body is burning so furiously in this moment; they all have their own things now. It’s not like before, when they had a legitimate reason to borrow things like clothing. Years ago it was normal for a member to have a solo schedule or a special recording and ask for to borrow a nicer shirt or some designer jeans. But now? Now when they’ve officially made it, when they’ve got their own private suites and more money in the bank than they could have ever dreamed off, there is absolutely no reason for this monstrosity.

 

Sungyeol is probably going to kill his boyfriend. No- actually, he is going to kill his boyfriend. Because he is going through his underwear drawer, or what is pretending to be such a thing, and there is nothing left.

 

Nada. Zip. Zilch.

 

Which is outrageous, because Sungyeol just purchased a whole new set of designer underwear. Armani, the finest, the smooth cotton caressing his nether regions with a delicacy that is truly out of this world. No chafing, no irritation, no nothing- no matter how long of a schedule or how hard he practiced. Dancing in his Armani's was like a dream, the pinnacle of opulence because spending that much money on something as mundane as underwear had to be mental, but he rationed it all away because the Armani’s were that comfortable.

 

He had a variety of styles; boxer briefs, trunks, bikinis - and once, when he was feeling saucy on his anniversary, a pitch black g-string that had made Myungsoo’s eyes crossed when he revealed all of his glory. A small smile came across his face at the memory of just how devoted his boyfriend was to worshipping all of his sexy on that night, but he swiftly pushed it down.

 

Okay, so maybe there was still underwear left in his drawer but they were relics from the past! Old, unfashionable, poor excuses for underwear that he hadn’t touched in years! He wasn’t going to resort to extremes when the culprit was so near and his treasures could be recovered. He was mad, and he wasn’t going to let memories of sexy times save Myungsoo from what was sure to be a swift end.

 

And maybe, just maybe, he was angry with a small part of himself too. Because he had seen Myungsoo admiring his glorious underwear on multiple occasions, but he chalked it up to simple admiration. Because who wouldn’t be impressed by the newest collection? Semi lined, jersey stretch cotton with a hint of elastine, in a multitude of shades - his favorite being the hot pink because damn.

 

In fact, thinking back on it, he would have been upset with Myungsoo if he hadn’t noticed the upgrade in his underwear game. Going from questionable department store baggy boxers with holes to impeccable body fitting, curve emphasizing, designer duds was something to be celebrated, not ignored.

 

But. But. That did not give Myungsoo a free pass to steal his most beloved treasures! Did Sungyeol steal Myungsoo’s hat, even though it looked better on him and he pulled it off with such grace? No. Did Sungyeol steal away Myungsoo’s plaid button up atrocities, even though it would have been doing his boyfriend a huge favor? No. Did Sungyeol use his relationship with Myungsoo to gain access to his most prized possessions just so he could steal them for his own comfort? No, no, no!

 

Which is why Sungyeol was so ticked off. Myungsoo was… Myungsoo. The boy was a bit obsessive, yes but… that was no reason for him to take all of Sungyeol’s underwear! Hell, if Myungsoo wanted to take pictures of him in something like a risque boudoir photo shoot he would have agreed with relish! And if Myungsoo wanted them for himself, just so he could wear them and feel their velvety goodness amongst his private areas, then Sungyeol was going to explode. Myungsoo had more schedules than anyone, which equated to more money than the rest of the members, meaning that he could buy multiple collections of Armani underwear himself!

 

No, Sungyeol was not going to take this lying down. He was going to march to Myungsoo’s room and save his precious clothing from his greedy boyfriend. He set off without a second thought, his eyes burning with righteous desire, zeroing in on his boyfriend with deadly accuracy.

 

“You! You thief. You have literal seconds to return what is rightfully mine.”

 

Myungsoo looked at him strangely, sitting on his bed with his acoustic guitar in his lap, his hands freezing mid strum as he took in the hurricane that was Sungyeol that had just stormed into his room. He closed his eyes, trying in vain to come up with a single altercation on his part, but he came up with nothing. “Huh?”

 

“Huh? Huh?! Don’t play dumb with me. Get rid of the stupid guitar and strip.”

 

Now Myungsoo was definitely confused. One moment Sungyeol is screaming at him and now he wanted sex? Normally he was the kind of guy who was ready to go at a moment’s notice, but now he was feeling a little weary after seeing that look of vengeance in Sungyeol’s eye. “You want me to… take off my clothes?”

 

Sungyeol sighed heavily, pulling the guitar away from Myungsoo himself. “Not all of your clothes you idiot- just the pants!”

 

“Yeollie… I’m not sure about this-”

 

“Now!” Sungyeol demanded, determined to expose his boyfriend and catch him red handed. And God help him if Myungsoo was wearing his favorite pink zebra polyester blend- those were for special occasions!

 

His impatience got the best of him, and he reached out to start working on Myungsoo’s jeans. He ripped the button loose and tried to tug down the zipper when Myungsoo actively tried to stop escaping him.

 

“Yeollie, stop! I don’t feel comfortable with this! If this is some sort of domination thing, we haven’t even properly discussed safe words! Ouch, that is delicate, be careful with that zipper!”

 

“Hush you! You aren’t getting laid anytime soon and if you don’t confess right now, you can say goodbye to your dick forever!”

 

Myungsoo abruptly rolled away, his hands covering his dick fearfully. Sungyeol narrowed his eyes at him, trying to come closer but Myungsoo evaded him. They ended up doing a weird sort of dance around the tiny room as Sungyeol tried to chase the other man down. Unfortunately Myungsoo was a crafty little bitch and able to stay a hair’s breadth out of his long arm length.

 

“Just tell me what you are doing! I don’t understand this!”

 

“Show me the underwear and then we’ll talk!”

 

“What underwear?!”

 

“The ones you’re wearing right now, you idiot!” Sungyeol demanded and Myungsoo shivered.

 

“I will show you- but you have to stay on the other side of the bed. I’m serious, you’re freaking me out a little bit!” Myungsoo tried to reason with him, and Sungyeol crossed his arms angrily.

 

“Fine. I’ll stay over here but you gotta show me them right now!”

  
“Okay, okay.” Myungsoo said nervously, safely pulling down his zipper and shimmying down his jeans to expose a quite boring pair of black boxer briefs. With no Armani label in sight.

 

“Argh! Put it away!”

 

“I thought you wanted-”

 

“I said cover up!” Myungsoo hurried to obey, feeling a tiny bit safer when he wasn’t standing there with his pants open and a dumb look on his face. But now Sungyeol was slowly stalking closer, his eyes narrowing with his suspicions. “If you tell me where it is, right here, right now, then maybe… maybe you will be spared.”

 

“Sungyeol I have no idea what you are talking about!”

 

“Oh sure you do! Don’t think I didn’t notice you admiring them! The way you were always sticking your hand in my pants to cop a feel. Maybe it wasn’t me you were trying to touch all this time… you just wanted the underwear for yourself!”

 

“Underwear? Why would I need more underwear?”

 

“Exactly! Why would you?! And why would you steal all of mine? Take it from the Sunggyu or something, his ass is just as big as yours! God, you’ve probably stretched out my precious Armani’s, now they’ll be all saggy in the butt and it’s all your fault, you monster!”

 

Myungsoo blinked, trying to process Sungyeol’s crazy. “Wait- you think I stole your Armani’s?”

 

“I don’t think, I know! Who else would do something this devious… this twisted?”

 

Myungsoo laughed, which in retrospect might not have been the smartest course of action, but he couldn’t help it! This whole situation was ludicrous, and he truly wasn’t responsible. “Babe… I know you’re upset and I know this isn’t a joke. I know firsthand just how important your Armani’s are to you. And I wouldn’t take them, I swear! Maybe the cleaning lady took them for laundry service or something-”

 

“It’s Tuesday.” Sungyeol cut him off. “Laundry gets picked up on Fridays. And even then, I get my Armani’s sent to a special cleaners.”

 

“You send them to a special cleaners? But… why?”

 

Sungyeol stomped his foot loudly. “Because they are my Armani’s!”

 

“Okay, okay. So the cleaners don’t have them. Have you searched your room?”

 

Sungyeol breathed out loudly, closing his eyes and praying up to the Gods above for patient to deal with this fool. “Why would I need to search my room, when I have a literal underwear drawer where all of my underwear goes! It’s literally in its name! There is nowhere else it could be!”

 

Myungsoo shrugged his shoulders. “Then I don’t know what to tell you babe! I didn’t take them; honest. I have no idea where they are.”

 

Sungyeol stared at his boyfriend silently for a few seconds, doing his best to get a read on him. On one hand, Myungsoo wasn’t really a good liar… he seemed sincere when he said he didn’t take them. But if he didn’t take them, where could they be? He was about to open his mouth to apologize when a flash of bright baby blue caught his eye. He pushed his boyfriend out of the way and gasped in horror when his fingers picked up the slightly hidden fabric to reveal- “My babies! You thief! This is a 2016 Summer collection exclusive color! I know they are mine cause I got them for my birthday from a fansite! You better start coughing up the rest, or you’ll truly be sorry!”

 

Myungsoo’s hands flew up in a defensive possession, his eyes wide in slight terror. “Sungyeol, I- I have no idea why those are in here! I didn’t take them! Maybe you left them in here the last time we were fooling around-”

 

Sungyeol cut him off, pointing his finger menacingly. “Don’t you dare. I would never leave something so precious behind!”

 

Myungsoo opened his mouth to argue when a gray blur streaked past them, snatching the fabric out of his boyfriend’s hand. Sungyeol yelped, jumping off the ground with a horrified screech.

 

“What the hell was that?! What kind of underwear demon spirit-”

 

Myungsoo couldn’t help himself, he burst out laughing. And the more he tried to stop it, the louder it got. Sungyeol was turning positively red with anger and he couldn’t make himself calm down. Because he knew who stole the underwear, and Sungyeol was going to owe him one hell of an apology.

 

“You better quit laughing at me right now or so help me-”

 

“Just be quiet and follow me.” Myungsoo said firmly, moving forward to grab Sungyeol’s hand. He dragged him towards his closet, the pieces to the mystery finally starting to fall together. “I learned that I had to be careful with leaving my clothes lying around, Byeol can be pretty sneaky when she wants something.”

 

“Byeol? What does your cat have to do with anything?” Sungyeol demanded angrily, his feet dragging on the floor just to be difficult.

 

“Do you leave your underwear drawer open?”

 

“I don’t know, maybe sometimes. Why?”

 

“Cause Byeol likes soft things. And your underwear are very soft.” Myungsoo flicked on the closer light, getting on his hands and knees to look for his kitty. “Byeol, come here baby.” He called to his girl, making little tsking sounds to try and lure her out. Finally he saw the big green eyes, he dark gray head popping up of the corner before jogging closer.

 

Byeol crawled around Myungsoo’s hands, flicking her tail lovingly in his face with a happy mewl before darting back to her hiding place. Myungsoo chuckled, looking over his shoulder. “Come take a look.”

 

“This is stupid. I don’t know why I let you drag me into things like this. We both know that you stole my underwear and life would be so much easier if you would just admit-” Sungyeol stopped abruptly, spotting a truly impressive pile of Armani underwear, various bright colors and alluring prints mashed together in a pile created by the thrifty cat. Byeol sat upon his underwear throne proudly, a low content purring evident throughout the tiny space.

 

“That you were wrong?” Myungsoo finished for him, smirking at his boyfriend.

 

“This is…”

 

“You gotta admit. It’s kind of funny.”

 

“My boyfriend’s cat being a kleptomaniac is not funny. Seize him at once!”

 

Myungsoo chuckled, reaching for his baby and curling the warm bundle close to his chest. Him and Byeol watched with amused eyes as Sungyeol used his t-shirt as a makeshift bag, putting all of the underwear he could manage to carry before turning on him with a stern glare.

 

“I will be back, so don’t you do dare let her go.”

 

“Whatever you say babe.” Myungsoo agreed, sitting on the floor and petting his cat as Sungyeol went back and forth between his room and the closet, reclaiming all of his precious underwear. When the last piece was safely tucked away in his room, Sungyeol returned, a pouty look on his face.

 

“What’s wrong babe? Something you need to say?”

 

Sungyeol sighed, clearly not wanting to admit he was wrong but knowing he needed to apologize. Myungsoo loved seeing him struggle. He let go of Byeol, the gray cat scurrying away with a displeased grumble as Myungsoo stood to his feet.

 

“Yeah, keep you little thief away from my underwear!”

 

“I can’t help it if she likes your things. I’ll try to keep an eye out if she thinks about making a repeat offense. But you should try to keep your drawer closed and the door to your room shut, just to be safe.” Myungsoo said logically, putting his arms around his boyfriend’s shoulders. “Anything else babe?”

 

Sungyeol mumbled something into Myungsoo’s neck, but the younger boy wasn’t having it. “What was that?”

 

“I said I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have accused you of stealing my Armani’s. But it was your cat so in a way, you’re kind of guilty.”

 

Myungsoo scrunched his nose cutely, shaking his head. “I don’t think so. If anything, I should be the hero. I’m the one who figured out who committed the crime.”

 

Sungyeol sighed, pushing Myungsoo away to retreat back to his room. “This isn’t over! You are so paying my laundry bill and if there is even a single cat hair left on my Armani’s when I get them back, you’re going to pay for it again!”

 

The door slammed with a resounding bang, and Myungsoo sat back down on his bed with a chuckle. Byeol glanced at him expectantly, and Myungsoo decided to decipher the cute little look in her eyes as an agreement to be good. He patted the mattress and the cat jumped up next to him, resting her paws and face on his knee.

 

Myungsoo picked up his guitar, settling on his lap to begin practicing again. He had a feeling that Byeol was going to be his only company for awhile; Sungyeol wouldn’t be forgiving this incident anytime soon.

  
He smiled at Byeol as he started to sing, his fingers strumming the guitar strings; at least he had his cute kitty to cuddle with him on the lonely nights.


	9. movies.

   
  


“We haven’t been spending enough time together.”

 

There’s a chorus of groans from around the room at the leader’s words, some more vocal than others.

 

“Hyung, that’s ridiculous! We're consistently around each other, with filming for the reality show and sharing rooms, it’s more plausible to say that we’re never alone.” Hoya complained, getting comfortable on the other rapper’s legs.

 

“He’s right Gyu, there’s so many people in and out of the dorm lately that I hardly ever have a moment to do my beauty routine.”

 

“Woohyun, please.” The maknae cut off his whining, grabbing a chocolate bar from the main vocal who sneered at the loss.

 

“Come on guys, I’m sure that hyung has a reason for saying this! If he wants us all to spend time together than we should.” Dongwoo said warmly, giving Sunggyu a smile of encouragement.

 

“Yes.” He straightened up at Dongwoo’s words, feeling more confident. “Now as I was saying, we need to hang out as a group. As a whole.” He stressed before Hoya interrupted again. “Myungsoo is finally back from Japan, and I know we all miss him so-”

 

“Movie night!” Sungyeol’s voice sang out as he appeared in the living room, both arms full with tubs of popcorn. “Marathon time! No falling asleep and no leaving the living room! We need to do something special to welcome Soo home!” He placed the bowls in the center of the room on the floor, before disappearing again.

 

“Really? Not that I’m not excited that Myungsoo hyung is home, but can we really afford to stay up late when our comeback is so close?” Sungjong asked worriedly.

 

Sunggyu nodded. “Actually, I talked to the managers. I told them how hard we’ve been working - Myungsoo even more so with the added drama schedules - and they agreed that we’ve earned a bit of a break. We don’t have practice until noon tomorrow, so we can sleep in as long as we want.”

 

“At least tell me we’re going to watch something badass…” Hoya said worriedly.

 

“Oh! Let’s watch X-men! They rebooted the series and I really want to see it!” Dongwoo said excitedly.

 

Woohyun scoffed. “No way, comic book movies always suck. Let’s watch Pirates of the Caribbean instead. I’d make a hot pirate, don’t you think Gyu?” He posed with his hands underneath his chin, and the leader promptly kicked him.

 

“I vote Transformers!” The maknae chimed in.

 

“It’s a movie night in honor of Myungsoo-” Sungyeol spoke up, reappearing with his arms now carrying a bunch of blankets. He started to distribute them around the room. “So we are going to watch something that Myungsoo wants to watch.”

 

This time the chorus of groans was even louder. “Seriously? I swear if we have to watch Love Actually again, I’ll purposely take the punishment.” Hoya rested the nearest bowl on his chest so Dongwoo could easily access the popcorn.

 

“Before we all start throwing in more movie options, why don’t we just save ourselves the trouble and ask Myungsoo?” Sungyeol plopped down next to me, tossing the blanket over the both of us. The rest of the guys in the room turned to me expectantly, and I shifted under the attention. While it would have been nice to watch something romantic and lighthearted, I wanted to pick something that all of us would enjoy.

 

“Um… I heard that Thor is pretty good…”

 

“Aw, comic books.” Woohyun complained, which earned him another kick from Sunggyu.

 

“Thor sounds great. Everyone get comfortable and I’ll put it on.” Sunggyu set up the laptop, finding a stream link for the movie with relative ease. Soon enough the movie was playing on the screen, and everyone had quieted down to focus on the film.

 

“You okay?”

 

I turned at Sungyeol’s voice, still able to make out his concerned expression in the darkness. His black bangs were falling into his eyes, which were travelling over me as if he was trying to figure me out. I snuggled into the blanket and shrugged my shoulders. “I’m fine.” I whispered back.

 

“You don’t seem too interested in the movie. We can watch a different one if you don’t like it…”

 

“No, it’s not that. The movie is alright, I’m just too tired to process it. Honestly, if it were up to me I’d be sleeping right now.”

 

“But it’s movie night.” Sungyeol stressed, shaking his head. “Sleeping is exactly what you aren’t allowed to do. Why did you go along with Sunggyu’s idea if you weren’t feeling up to it?” He asked me curiously.

 

“Because it’s kind of sweet for him to make us all spend time together. And honestly… being without you guys was hard. I missed you all more than I probably should have.” I admitted.

 

Sungyeol wrapped an arm around my waist underneath the blanket. “Well we missed you too.”

 

“Shhhh!” We both looked up at the noise, receiving a withering glare from Woohyun.

 

“For someone who doesn’t care about comic book movies, he seems to be a little invested in the film, don’t you think?” Sungyeol teased and I burst into laughter.

 

“Seriously? We’re trying to watch a movie here.” Woohyun complained, rolling his eyes before turning back to the computer screen.

 

Sungyeol mocked his words behind the main vocal’s back, and I had to bury my face into his chest to stifle my giggles. He shifted his knees up, turning his head to the side to muffle his voice. “So what do you want me to do?”

 

“What?”

 

He made an exasperated face. “To keep you awake silly.”

 

“Oh. I don’t know. Pinch me if my eyes stay closed for too long.” I shrugged my shoulders, unable to come up with anything better. A wicked smile came over Sungyeol’s face and I began to get a bit nervous. “What?”

 

“Nothing, I think I can just come up with something a little more effective.” He turned away at that, his eyes focusing on the screen like the other members. I followed his lead, feeling a little anxious at his ominous words, but with time they faded away. Surprisingly enough I found myself getting drawn into the plot, intrigued by the concept of a hero being placed into a foreign world. I had always liked fantasy stories.

 

But no matter how interesting Thor and Jane were, I had a day full of schedules and a night spent traveling through airports working against them. Before long my eyelids were starting to droop closed for seconds, and then minutes…

 

“Myungsoo?” I felt the nudge on my shoulder and I dragged my eyes over to him. “You awake?”

 

“Mhmm.” I murmured sleepily, and Sungyeol grinned at me.

 

“Liar.” He teased, his head nudging my cheek.

 

“Now might be the time to start pinching me.” I confessed, running a tired hand over my face.

 

Sungyeol shifted closer, his mouth moving to my ear. “I had something a little less painful in mind.”

 

“Yeol, what- ah!” The moan slipped out of my mouth before my hand could cover it up.

 

“Can you not? Loki is on the screen!” Sungjong reprimanded us, thankfully too engrossed with the film to turn around at my slip of control.

 

“Quiet.” Sungyeol whispered into my ear, his hand moving softly over the front of my jeans. “You wouldn’t want the others to turn around, would you?”

 

“Not here… I can’t.” I gritted out, my face already flushed over the small touches.

 

“You can.” He argued, his tongue running over my ear.

 

My eyes moved wildly over the other guys in the room, who were still watching the screen with interest. “The members-”

 

“The members are distracted.” Sungyeol said softly, his hand still moving underneath the blanket.

 

“This is too risky. You know I'm not the best with volume and-”

 

“Just relax.” He urged me, waiting for an explosion to occur during the battle on screen to cover the sound of his fingers unzipping my jeans. His hand slipped underneath my waistband, wrapping firmly around my already stiffening cock. “And enjoy.”

 

Sungyeol resumed his initial position, turning back to face the screen properly. His eyes were staring straight forward, his face a mask of indifference as if he was simply watching the movie. If someone were to turn around and look at him, they would have no idea what his right hand was currently up to underneath the blanket.

 

I, on the other hand, was a completely different story. I felt like my entire body was on fire, each stroke of his hand making me that much hotter. My teeth had sunken down on my bottom lip, trying to suppress any sounds from escaping. It was difficult, especially when he was twisting his hand over the head just so.

 

“Woohoo! Did you see that Myungie? I totally thought the Destroyer was going to take Thor down, but he prevailed and got his hammer back!” He turned around suddenly to look at me, and I thought I might stop breathing for a second. “Wasn’t it awesome?”

 

“Ah, uhm, yes. It was alright.” The hand tightened around my cock. “I meant awesome! Really, really awesome.” My eyes flickered over to Sungyeol, who was still staring straight ahead as if nothing was happening.

 

Dongwoo giggled, pleased with my answer. Sunggyu, however, was unfavorably perceptive. “You alright Myungsoo? Your voice sounds a little off… you aren’t coming down with anything, are you?” Right now was probably one of the worst moments for him to be worried about my vocals.

 

“Quit worrying so much Gyu, he’s fine. Just give him some popcorn or a drink or something. Now can everyone shut the hell up so I can actually pay attention now that Thor is back in Asgard. I’d like to be able to hear the confrontation with Loki.” Woohyun scoffed.

 

Sunggyu reached back to hand me a water bottle and one of the bowls, which I took with a nervous smile. Sungyeol settled the bowl in his lap, his left hand picking up pieces of popcorn lazily. I couldn’t even believe this turn of events; I was sitting here squirming and Sungyeol was casually eating popcorn as he jerked me off underneath a blanket.

 

“How long has it been since I touched you like this? You being in Japan, cameras around all the time… you must be wanting me pretty badly.” Sungyeol pressed up close to me, his lips brushing against the back of my neck. “And later, once I get you all alone and to myself, I’ll show you just how much I appreciate your patience.”

 

I couldn’t stop the moan slipping out, and this time it was Hoya who turned around. He gave me his infamous bitch stare and I coughed exaggeratedly, making a show of taking a sip of water to explain myself.

 

“How much longer do you think you can last?” Sungyeol whispered, his hand tightening around on my cock. I was biting my lip so hard that I was sure that I would draw blood, the waves of pleasure so intense that my eyes were starting to flutter shut.

 

“It makes you harder, doesn’t it? Being in here with the other members, feeling my hand on your cock with them only inches away.”

 

“Yeol.” I whispered back, my hand grasping his bicep tightly as I felt myself getting closer to my peak.

 

“Answer. Tell me how good it feels to have me touch you like this where all of them could see you.” He moved his hand faster, building up his rhythm as his words got dirtier.

 

“Yeol.” I repeated, my legs shifting around as my toes started to curl.

 

All it took was a whispered I love you in that sensual deep tone of voice in my ear and his thumb brushing over the slit of my cock to push me over the edge. I pushed my fingers into my mouth to stifle my moan as I climaxed, biting down on them harshly to try to cover the sound.

 

By the time it was over and I could see straight again, Sungyeol was already tucking me back into my pants. He raised an eyebrow at me confidently, pulling out his hand from underneath the blanket. I was about to say something - maybe along the lines of what the hell were you thinking, we could have gotten caught, are you crazy - but all rational thoughts left my brain when I watched Sungyeol lick his hand clean.

 

My mouth dropped open in shock, watching his pink tongue dart out to repeatedly lap up my come. I couldn’t think straight, unable to catch my breath at his audacity. I was staring at him dumbly when the lights suddenly flickered on, signifying the end of the film.

 

“Okay, that was bad ass!” Woohyun proclaimed, already scrolling back through the film to rewatch the battle scenes.

 

“It was really good! I think Sif is my favorite, her shield is pretty!” Dongwoo added happily.

 

“Armor isn’t pretty Dongwoo.” The other rapper stated factually.

 

The maknae shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, it looked pretty fashionable to me.” He turned around to look at us. “Quit hogging all the popcorn Sungyeol hyung.” He went to reach for our bowl, but abruptly stopped in favor of grabbing the one off Hoya’s chest.

 

“Hey, I thought you said you were going to take Sungyeol’s?” Hoya protested.

 

“I was until I saw him licking his fingers, that’s totally gross. Of course Myungsoo doesn’t mind, they practically share everything anyway.” Sungjong responded, looking at the two of us with clear judgement. I wanted to laugh because the maknae literally had no idea just how true his statement was.

 

Sungyeol shrugged his shoulders, making a show of licking his fingertip. “What can I say, I like salty things.”

 

I started to choke, for obvious reasons, the innuendo too much to handle in my current state. I ripped the blanket off of me, standing up on shaky legs. “I- um, think I’m gonna go.”

 

“You look flushed, you’re all red. Are you sure you’re okay?” Dongwoo asked worriedly, pushing Hoya off his lap to stand up to get a closer look at me.

 

I backed up, forcing a nervous smile to my face. “I’m fine. It’s just-” I looked over to Sungyeol, who was obnoxiously licking his lips, and I immediately turned away. “Jetlag! I’m just tired from travelling, and the movie was good-”

 

“I thought it was awesome?” Sungyeol asked, flashing his teeth at me with a teasing grin.

 

“Whatever, just- I’m going to go to bed now. So thanks, to all of you, for spending time with me and making my first night back so-”

 

“Memorable?” Sungyeol smiled up at me and I laughed nervously.

 

“Memorable. Yes. So…” I looked around at the other members, who were staring at me strangely. I knew with each passing second I was becoming more awkward and there was only way to escape this situation. “Goodnight!”

 

I practically ran out of the living room, shutting the door behind me and jumping into bed. I finally allowed myself to breathe, forcing the oxygen back into my lungs after feeling so lightheaded for so long. My secret boyfriend had just spent the majority of the movie fondling me underneath the blanket as if it was no big deal. How could I act _normal_ after something like that? I could hear the voices of the members through the thin walls.

 

“Myungsoo seemed a little weird…” Dongwoo stated.

 

I could hear the other rapper laugh. “It’s Myungsoo.”

 

“Granted, but he did seem a little strange. Maybe he’s more tired than he’s admitting.” Sunggyu added thoughtfully. “Sungyeol, you’re closest to Myungsoo. Why don’t you and Dongwoo switch rooms for the night so you can keep a close eye on him.”

 

“Of course hyung.” Sungyeol’s voice rang out, a little too happy, and sure enough within moments the bedroom door was opening and closing, a warm body joining me on top of the mattress.

 

“I’m sure you heard the news. Our leader has appointed me to be your caretaker for the rest of the night, and I take this role very seriously.” He pulled the covers over us, straddling my waist with in one swift move. He leaned down then, kissing me once - short but deep, his tongue licking into my mouth in that teasing way - before pulling back. He kept his mouth close, his teeth nipping at my lips.

 

“You’re crazy… we could’ve been caught-”

 

“We weren’t.” He stressed, pressing kisses down my throat. “I couldn’t help it… I just missed you so fucking much I couldn’t wait.” Our lips meet again, my hands tangling in his dark black hair as our mouths moved together.

 

I rolled our bodies over, pressing his back into the mattress. His eyes widened at the change in position, before an anticipating smile came over his face. “You’re still crazy.” I reached down between us, my hand unbuttoning Sungyeol’s jeans.

 

“And now, it's _my_ turn.”


	10. friend.

   
  


  
Sungyeol was tired.

 

Not just physically, because honestly that’s become so normal that it barely even fazes him anymore, but mentally exhausted. When he got the role in the drama he was ecstatic, couldn’t believe his luck, even if it was just the second lead. But he had forgotten how grueling shooting schedules could be, how time consuming a role was. And sure he didn’t have to spend every moment of his free time on set mentally critiquing his last take, and of course he wasn’t required to do research for his role, but he did. He had to, acting was one of his passions and it was something that he wanted people to think he was good at. But doing all of this on top of Last Romeo promotions - which painfully wasn’t getting as good of a response from the public as he had hoped - just made him, well, tired.

 

He was currently in his room alone, some of the others had went out for dinner but he wasn’t feeling up to it. In the morning they had done a prerecording for a music show, that afternoon was the music show itself, and right after he and Woohyun had been whisked away to the set to film retakes for the script changes. Sungyeol closed his eyes, resting his weary head against the wall for a small moment of peace. The new script was held securely in his hand, but no matter how many times he tried to read over the page the lines just didn’t sink in. He wanted to give up, to sink into his pillows and refuse to open his eyes again until morning, but his desire to prove himself as an actor won out in the end. Sungyeol made himself shift up in bed, ready to tackle the page all over again.

 

There was a light knock on his door, before the door creaked open to reveal the cautious face of his best friend. “Yeollie?” The dark eyes flickered over Sungyeol’s body. “It was so quiet, I thought you might be asleep.”

 

Sungyeol shook his head and Myungsoo stepped into the room, closing the door behind him softly. “I thought you went to dinner with the others.” He asked confused, shifting over on his bed to make room for the new addition.

 

“Oh, I was going to. But then you said you wanted to stay here, and I feel like we’ve barely seen each other lately. Outside of practice I mean.” Myungsoo explained, grabbing one of the free pillows to rest it under his chin.

 

“Tell me about it. Everytime I want to complain about my schedule I remember that Woohyun has it so much worse than I do. He had Toheart before we started doing stuff for our album, and he has to carry the weight of the lead-”

 

“That doesn’t matter.”

 

Sungyeol lifted his eyebrows in surprise. “What do you mean?”

 

“You are allowed to be exhausted Yeol. You shouldn’t put on a brave face just because of someone else. Especially in front of me. I’m your best friend, you’re supposed to tell me this kind of stuff. The others have been asking me how you are handling it, and I don’t know what to say.”

 

Sungyeol sighed, “This is exactly why I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want them to worry or think that I couldn’t handle it. I’ll get used to it, no matter how crazy the schedules get, eventually it becomes normal.”

 

Myungsoo shook his head, reaching out his hand to rest it on Sungyeol’s thigh. “It doesn’t matter if it becomes ‘normal’ Yeol. What I’m saying is that I’m here for you. I just want you to know that you can talk to me.” He looked down at the bed, his eyes worried. “When we are at practice we don’t talk because we are focused on perfecting our routines. And at schedules we’re worried about our image. Then you’re gone because you’re filming. I don’t know Yeol… I’m just not sure if we aren’t talking because you’re too tired or because you’re hiding something from me.”

 

“Hiding something from you?”

 

The younger man shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know… maybe the managers said something about your appearance or you read a hateful article online… or the PD for the drama isn’t treating you fairly on set... honestly, each scenario I think of is worst than the last one.”

 

Sungyeol actually laughed, because it was sweet that Myungsoo worried about him, but it was unnecessary. He reached out, wrapping his arms around the visual, who made a surprised noise at the initiation of skinship. “Soo, you don’t have to worry about me. I’m okay, I’ll admit that I’m tired, but I promise that I’m okay.” He loosened the hug so he could stare into the dark eyes. “When I accepted the role I knew that this was part of it. I knew it would be hard to do this while we were promoting. But I still wanted to, no one forced me to audition. I want to act Soo, and if that means that I’m tired for a couple of months, then I think that’s a fair trade.”

 

Myungsoo nodded, his hand tightening on Sungyeol’s thigh. The taller man laughed softly, tilting his head to the side. “Why are you so worried about me Soo?”

 

“Because you’re my best friend.” He lifted up his other hand, placing it gingerly on Sungyeol’s shoulder, “Because I care about you.”

 

“I care about you too.” Sungyeol told him honestly, “Maybe even more than you care about me.”

 

Myungsoo made somewhat of a bitter noise, his gaze shifting away. “Somehow I doubt that.”

 

“Soo…”

 

“Just- promise me that from now on you’ll check in with me. I don’t care what I’m doing, I don’t care if you get back from filming at 2 am and I’m already asleep. Just please let me know at least once a day that you are doing well. If you really care about me, then you’ll do this for me.”

 

Sungyeol’s teeth troubled his lip as he thought over Myungsoo’s words. “You know I hate to bother other people-”

 

“It’s not a bother and I'm not 'other people'.” Myungsoo cut him off, his hand moving softly up Sungyeol’s neck. “Please.”

 

“Okay.” The taller man nodded in agreement as a small smile found a way to his face. “Sometimes I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve a friend like you.”

 

“Nothing.” Sungyeol gave him a surprised look and Myungsoo smiled sheepishly. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant that you didn’t have to do anything to deserve me. Just you being you is enough.”

 

“I feel the same. I know if it wasn’t for you being at my side, supporting me and keeping me grounded, that I probably wouldn’t have been able to handle being in this industry. I don’t know what I would have done without you.” Sungyeol added.

 

“That makes me happy… just knowing that I’m important to you. Because for me…” He looked away again, taking a deep breath as if he was having trouble getting the words out. “It’s just that no one compares to you.”

 

“Soo…”

 

Somehow Sungyeol knew it was coming. Maybe it was the conversation, the hopeful look in Myungsoo’s eyes, or the hand that gripped his thigh harder. But one moment his eyes were open, looking at the somewhat scared expression on his best friend’s face. And the next they were closed, because there was the softest pair of lips pressing against his own. It only lasted for the briefest of moments, before the lips were gone and his eyes were opening to see a blush on Myungsoo’s face.

 

Myungsoo was covering his mouth, his eyes looking everywhere but Sungyeol as the reality of what he had just done sank in. Sungyeol could see the panic start to enter Myungsoo’s eyes, his body tensing up after realizing that he had just kissed his best friend.

 

So he did the only thing he could do. He reached for Myungsoo’s hand, pulling it away from his mouth. And then he leaned in, pressing his lips against Myungsoo’s with no hesitation. When he pulled back he saw the clear shock in the younger’s dark eyes.

 

“You just kissed me.” Myungsoo said matter of factly, and Sungyeol had to laugh in response.

 

“But you kissed me first.”

 

“But you kissed me back.” Myungsoo said the words disbelievingly, his fingertips touching his lips.

 

“Yes, I did. Now would you like to spend the rest of the evening stating the obvious, or do you want to help me practice my lines?” He swatted the other’s leg playfully with his script.

 

Myungsoo nodded in a daze, his eyes blinking as he tried to focus on the words on the page.

 

“Let’s start at the top of page three.” He opened his mouth to say the first line, but the sudden pressure on his cheek made him pause.

 

Myungsoo rested his head on Sungyeol’s shoulder, looking quite smug after delivering the peck. “I’m ready now.”

 

Sungyeol raised his eyebrows at Myungsoo’s sudden boldness, but he couldn’t say he had any complaints. Not when Myungsoo was nuzzling into his side, one of his hands holding the page to get a better view of the lines. Of course Myungsoo would always be there for him, willing to help him with whatever he needed. He was just that good of a friend, and now... maybe he was even more.

  
He smiled, leaning over to rest his head on top of Myungsoo’s, and started to read. Suddenly he didn’t feel so tired anymore.


	11. fights.

Myungsoo taps his fingers on his thighs, that feeling of dread that had been building up inside of him ever since Sungyeol had asked him to teach him how to fight exploding behind his eyes. He knew it was a bad idea right from the start, but the sad truth was that he couldn't hardly ever bring himself to say no to Sungyeol, especially when his boyfriend would bat his eyelashes and pout his lips and draw out the word pleeeeease in that obnoxious way that somehow still managed to be endearing.

 

Fuck, sometimes even he knew how pathetically bad he had it for Sungyeol.

 

But Sungyeol had been adamant and his intentions had been pure - I want my fighting to look believable in the music video, maybe I'll get more scenes if I look convincing - and Myungsoo wanted that for Sungyeol too, wanted everyone to look at him and notice just how sexy the tall boy was when he was pretend kicking ass.

 

Well, maybe not so much the last one, because he was kind of possessive in a way that he would never admit - even though all the guys knew and it was blatantly obvious.

 

Things at first seemed to be going pretty smoothly; all seven of them attended the training school together, practiced basic fighting moves as well as how to act like you were getting beat up when in reality it was all fake. Then they would split up into smaller groups, work one on one with a stunt man to perfect the battle choreography.

 

It was actually kind of fun to have this as a schedule; he knew the concept would take the fans by surprise just as well as he knew that they could all pull it off. That was one of the best things about being in a group like Infinite, their versatility and ability to adapt meant the concepts were always changing, so things never got boring. All of the guys couldn't help getting into it; play fighting between takes and fake punching each other at photoshoots just for the hell of it. It was nice to see all of them so pumped for the comeback, everyone's mood uplifted from the feeling of upcoming schedules and the potential for more wins.

 

Infinite was always the most content and happy when they were all busy.

 

But there was always that potential for overworking themselves, of practicing too much so that there was almost more harm done than good. They still had all their regular training - vocal lessons and dance practices - but now the fighting school, despite being fun to attend, was just another drain on their energy.

 

Myungsoo wanted nothing more than to freshen up and go to sleep, but Sungyeol's wandering hands and continuous bouncing in the van let him know he wouldn't be getting rest any time soon. Sungyeol all but steered him to the shower, ignoring Woohyun's leering looks and Sungjong's pinched expression as he babbled on about this and that. They usually did try to be a bit more discreet about their relationship, so Sungyeol openly declaring that they were going to take a shower together made a bell inside of him ring with warning.

 

Sungyeol trying to get him alone and naked no matter what the others in the dorm thought about it, usually meant his boyfriend wanted something, and it usually wasn't good - he rubbed his back absentmindedly at the phantom pain from that one time Sungyeol convinced him to do it in the stairwell, and hoped to god that Sungyeol didn't want a repeat because his back killed him for an entire week after that spectacle.

 

He tried not to be too weary as he lathered up the shampoo in his hair - and he tried not to openly stare at Sungyeol as he soaped up his body, but he was a weak man when it came to Sungyeol touching any part of himself for whatever the reason - and finally, just when Myungsoo thought the coast was clear and his worrying had been for nothing, Sungyeol dropped the bomb on him.

 

"Myungsoo... I want to ask you to do something for me and you’re probably going to want to say no at first, but I want you to trust my judgement."

 

Yeah, because with a lead in like that Myungsoo totally wasn't frightened at all - except he really was, because the last time Sungyeol had started a request with that kind of ominous beginning it had involved warming lube and Myungsoo had regretted it for days - his hand might have subconsciously drifted towards his dick to protect it from any fiery assault.

 

"Okay..." He started tentatively, trying not to let his voice waver as he stood under the spray of water.

 

"Well I've just been thinking about the comeback and I think it really suits me. I like the style of it and I think I'm doing good at the fighting bits."

 

"You are." Myungsoo agreed, unsure of where this was going.

 

"I know some of us are going to have props once we get on set-"

 

"Sungyeol, you know that Sungjong lost the bet on how long Sunggyu could hold out on Woohyun. He's the one that will have to use the umbrella, so you're safe." Myungsoo rattled off, still secretly pleased that he had been the closest when guessing the number of days Sunggyu managed to resist Woohyun's advances - eight days, to be exact.

 

"Well I know that but... it got me to thinking. I know there will be the typical stuff; bats and crowbars and such. But I think it would be really cool if I had like an actual weapon."

 

The way Sungyeol emphasized that last word make Myungsoo shiver in anticipation, but not necessarily in a good way. Myungsoo had a nightmare vision of Sungyeol accidentally shooting someone or even worse, himself, on set if tried to look cool with a gun. He crossed his fingers on his thigh and set up a silent prayer - for the love of god please do not let my boyfriend fantasize about getting his hands on something as dangerous as a firearm.

 

"What exactly do you mean by weapon? This is all just pretend Sungyeol, you better not be dreaming up anything illegal-"

 

Sungyeol rolled his eyes so hard that it actually looked painful. "Why are you so quick to jump to the worst conclusions when it comes to my ideas?" Myungsoo gave him a hard look and Sungyeol conceded. "Okay, so maybe my ideas aren't always the best but I always have good intentions! And this one is totally harmless so you don't have to look so terrified."

 

"Just tell me." Myungsoo grumbled, steeling himself for whatever misadventure was indebtedly in their future.

 

Sungyeol got a devious smile on his face. "I want you to introduce me to your danger sticks."

 

Myungsoo sighed, shaking his head. "Sungyeol, you know I don't like it when you give my dick ridiculous nicknames."

 

"What? This has nothing to do with your dick, you perv. I meant danger sticks as in nunchaku. I wanna go ninja on these bitches."

 

Myungsoo raised a hand to his head, rubbing his temples at the headache he could already feel coming on. "Nunchuks aren't a toy babe. They're known to be dangerous for a reason. I don't want you hurting yourself for something as silly as a four minutes music video."

 

"But that's why I have you to teach me! Come on, let's go back to the Jiu days, minus the horrid wig. I know the stylists are planning to make you go blonde so it's kind of perfect."

 

"It's not perfect at all, we don't have nearly enough time for you to practice properly and this is literally a health hazard and it's too risky cause I'm not nearly good enough to be teaching you and-"

 

Sungyeol cut off Myungsoo's protests, sealing their lips together in a fierce kiss. Myungsoo temporarily lost his train of thought, especially when Sungyeol rubbed his thigh in between his legs, the slippery water and the smooth muscle giving him just the right amount of friction as Sungyeol's tongue pushed into his mouth. In a matter of seconds he was hard and aching and Sungyeol's hands were tickling down his sides, leaving soft red welts in their wake. Sungyeol kissed him long enough that the humid air and the hot water combined with his boyfriend's sensual kisses made him feel lightheaded and hazy. He blinked slowly when Sungyeol pulled away, just barely an inch between their mouths as the steam curled around them.

 

"Say yes." Sungyeol all but demanded, one of his hands moving below Myungsoo's waist to grip his hardness, the strokes slow enough to be teasing, the perfect balance of feeling good but not being nearly enough.

 

"You're seducing me." He accused, his eyelids heavy as Sungyeol licked his lips. God, he really loved staring at Sungyeol's full pink lips.

 

"That sounds suspiciously like a complaint."

 

"It is." Myungsoo whined, although his hips hard start to move into a rhythm, rocking slowly against Sungyeol's hand.

 

Sungyeol gave him a wicked smile, letting Myungsoo's length go in favor of grabbing onto his hips. He delighted in the wrecked moan that pulled out of his lover, the feeling of their hard cocks pressing together always making him see stars. "You can't complain about something you like baby."

 

"I can. I will. This isn't a good idea." He tried to grasp onto the earlier words of his argument, but even he knew how pathetically unconvincing he sounded at the moment, when every other breath that came out of him sounded more like a moan.

 

"But I want to. And you'll say yes because you want to make me happy." Sungyeol moved Myungsoo's arm behind him, pushing it down to his opening.

 

Myungsoo knew he was being played but he also knew that he wanted Sungyeol, that they barely had time lately for making out, let alone this and he was helpless to resist him, not when Sungyeol's beautiful body was soaking wet and his pretty brown eyes had gone dark with arousal. Sungyeol arched his back, the wetness from the shower making the slide of his fingers go easier, and Myungsoo felt his last resolve disappear down the drain, just like the water around them.

 

When this would all inevitably go to hell, at least he'd have a hell of a memory to take with him. He pressed Sungyeol's body into the cold tile as he entered him, and resolutely decided not to think of all the different ways this could go wrong.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Myungsoo continuously tries to meet Sungyeol's eyes during dinner, but Sungyeol studiously ignores him. The three from the eleventh floor came down so they could all eat together, and Sungyeol brought chicken from his restaurant to feed everyone. Myungsoo knows their argument is a serious one because Sungyeol doesn't save the last plate of chicken for him, handing it off to Sungjong with a smile that Myungsoo wishes were directed towards him.

 

Sunggyu makes one dig about Sungyeol's eye, but the withering look he gets in return is so intense that no one in the circle dares to laugh. Dinner becomes tense after the exchange, and everyone fills their stomachs as quickly as possible before making excuses to leave.

 

Myungsoo opens his mouth to invite Sungyeol to come hang out with him so that he can attempt to begin the making up phase of their argument, but before he can even get a word out Woohyun is whisking his boyfriend away, babbling about miracle concealer and expensive bb cream that will supposedly solve all of Sungyeol's problems.

 

Myungsoo sighs.

 

He sees Sungjong shaking his head out of the corner of his eye, flipping through the pages of his magazine with a lazy flair.

 

"Shut up."

 

"I didn't say anything." Sungjong sings to himself, earmarking a page of an outfit that he particularly likes as he judges Myungsoo's predicament.

 

"I can't say no to him." Myungsoo says pathetically, which earns him no points with the maknae.

 

"And how's that method working out for you?"

 

Myungsoo glares at him for lack of a better response, and sulks all the way to his bedroom - firmly ignoring the whipping sound Sungjong makes as he walks away.

 

He plops down on the bed, frustrated with the situation, but mostly at himself. He knew that this wasn't the greatest idea and now he's paying for it.

 

Well maybe Sungyeol is paying for it just a tad bit more, considering he's the one with the black eye.

 

Myungsoo sighs.

 

Surprisingly enough, in the beginning things had been going pretty well. Sungyeol was actually listening to his instructions, pantomiming the movements and learning the technique without the nunchuks so his arms and hands could get accustomed to the idea.

 

Then Myungsoo made him start slowly, just a few simple twists of his wrists at a time to make the weapon spin. He even padded the wooden sticks so that if there was an accident, things wouldn't get too tragic.

 

They carried on for a few weeks like this, Sungyeol watching instructional videos on YouTube and occasionally interrupting Myungsoo's nap time to ask him a particular question. All in all, Myungsoo began to think that maybe he had been overreacting to the whole idea in the first place, Sungyeol was treating the matter seriously and he wasn't acting like the weapon was a play thing. Deep down Myungsoo actually felt kind of proud of him, his maturity on the subject taking him by surprise in a good way.

 

And all it took was one pointed comment from Hoya to make it all come crashing down.

 

All of the members were all gathered in the practice room, resting against the mirrors as they took a short break to eat some snacks and catch their breath.

 

Sungyeol was practicing with his nunchuks, the swishing sound as the sliced through the air constant and somewhat soothing.

 

The guys watched him with mild interest, no doubt sizing up if the action was really as difficult as it looked.

 

"It's pretty cool looking." Hoya had admitted as he shared a banana with Dongwoo. "But the padded cushions kind of ruin that effect."

 

Before Myungsoo could open his mouth to protest Sungyeol was tugging them off, a fierce gleam in his eye as he stated that he didn't need the safety guards anyway.

 

Not ten seconds later he had smacked himself in the eye, sending Myungsoo nearly into panic and springing the rest of the guys into action. Dongwoo was prodding him as if he was some kind of doctor and Sunggyu grumpily went to fetch a manager.

 

Two hours and a whole lot of silence later, Sungyeol was sulking with an eye bag pressed against his eye, hating the world and most definitely Myungsoo.

 

Myungsoo kind of thought it was unfair, he told his boyfriend to be careful and he put the safety guards on specifically so this wouldn't happen, but Sungyeol didn't seem to want to listen to reason.

 

In his mind Myungsoo had agreed to teach him how to use the nunchuks and now that it had resulted in his pretty face being not so pretty, Myungsoo had to suffer right along with him.

 

Myungsoo wallowed in his self pity, cuddling miserably with his pillow since it was clear that would be the only thing giving him action in the near future. About an hour or so later, of him doing nothing but staring at the ceiling, he heard his bedroom door open.

 

"I'm not in the mood." Normally he could muster up the energy to listen to Sungjong babble about fashion and designers and photoshoots, but today he just couldn't pretend.

 

"Then I guess I'll go."

 

Myungsoo nearly fell out of bed at the sound of Sungyeol's voice. "Wait! Please stay- I thought you were someone else. I want you to stay." He repeated, slightly in shock that Sungyeol was standing in front of him period.

 

Sungyeol closed the door behind him, trudging over to Myungsoo's bed with a sense of foreboding. "Well?"

 

"Well what?"

 

"How do I look?"

 

"Beautiful." The compliment seemed to have the opposite effect that Myungsoo wanted, judging by the angry look on his face. He quickly tried to backtrack. "You always look beautiful to me Yeol. I mean it."

 

Sungyeol sighed, looking vulnerable instead of angry for the first time since this whole debacle had started. "So you can't tell? The make up helps?"

 

"Even without the makeup, you're gorgeous."

 

"I have a black eye." Sungyeol said miserably.

 

"I know. But that doesn't make me want you any less. I'm sorry this happened, truly I am, but I don't want us to be like this anymore. Just let me support you, stop fighting me all the time."

 

"I know I'm being ridiculous, taking it out in you when it's not even your fault, but I can't help it. All I wanted was to stand out this comeback and instead all I have to show for my work is a messed up face."

 

“Hey there is nothing wrong with you. So you got hurt and that really sucks but it was for a good reason. It’s not like you got really drunk and hurt yourself being stupid. You were practicing for our comeback, trying to do something special and cool to impress the fans. Your heart was in the right place. You shouldn’t be ashamed of that, or of yourself.”

 

“But I look so ugly without the makeup Soo.”

 

“No, you don’t. You couldn’t look ugly, ever. In fact, I think it’s kind of sexy.”

 

Sungyeol dared to look up at him. “Really?”

 

“Yeah. It’s very handsome, in a rugged sort of way. When I see it I’ll just pretend you got it in a fight to defend my honor.”

 

“I would fight to defend your honor.” Sungyeol agreed, smiling for what might have been the first time since he got his injury.

 

“Or I could pretend you’re a bad boy, one of the types to get in fights all the time over nothing. Maybe I’m the teacher’s pet and we meet when I’m supervising you in detention…”

 

Sungyeol laughed, the sound sending waves of relief through Myungsoo, especially after going for hours without hearing it. “Are you seriously using my black eye to fuel your ideas for roleplay?”

 

“You’re the best actor out of all of us and your my boyfriend. It would be silly of me if I didn’t take advantage of this.”

 

“Your ability to find a silver lining is kind of impressive, in a kinky sort of way.”

 

“Whatever I can do to put a smile back on your face.” Myungsoo reached out for him, holding his cheek softly. “But seriously; it’ll be gone in a couple of days. We’ll keep ice on it and we’ll be extra careful to make sure that nothing else happens to this gorgeous face.”

 

Sungyeol startled him with the intensity of his hug, sending the both of them tumbling back on the bed. “How do you always know what to say to make me feel better?”

 

“Because I love you?” Myungsoo tried, pushing back Sungyeol’s long hair to look in his eyes.

 

“I love you too. And even if I get a little irrational and upset sometimes-”

 

“Sometimes?” Myungsoo joked, earning him a poke in the ribs.

 

“Okay fine, a lot of times, deep down I hope you know that I’m always thankful for you. I’m so lucky that you chose me.”

  
“You chose me first. And I’ve been a better person for it, every day since. Even if some of those days I have to deal with dodging flying objects and listening to your random rants.”

 

“Admit it; it keeps things interesting between us.”

 

“As if I could ever be bored when I’m with you.” Myungsoo agreed, leaning up for a quick kiss. But Sungyeol had different ideas, his tongue licking at Myungsoo’s lips to deepen the kiss.   
  
He ran his hands down Myungsoo’s body, gripping the waistband of his jeans with clear intentions. Myungsoo was about to start the process of stripping off his clothes when Sungyeol jumped off of him suddenly. He pressed up into a sitting position, clearly confused. “Sungyeol? Is something wrong?”

 

Sungyeol shook his head, leaning back over to steal a quick kiss. “Nothing’s wrong. Just gotta go to the bathroom and wash off this makeup. We gotta take advantage of this black eye while it lasts. Although I was thinking more like I’m your prisoner of war and the only way to get Korea’s battle secrets out of me is to seduce me. You know how I like it rough.”

 

He flitted away without another word, leaving Myungsoo reeling with the possibilities. He shook his head, reaching underneath his bed to retrieve their box of goodies. He went to pull out the rope, but switched to the padded handcuffs after thinking it over. The last thing they needed was another injury, from sex of all things, despite whatever good intentions they had.

 

“You ready for me yet, soldier?”

 

Myungsoo locked the door and tossed Sungyeol to the bed, pleased to see that he had lost his clothes before his reappearance. He shackled Sungyeol’s wrists together, getting lost momentarily in his boyfriend’s bright smile.

 

Maybe fighting wasn’t so bad after all, if they got to make up like this.

 


	12. sleep.

   
  


We had talked about it countless times;   
What should we do first when you get back from the jungle?

 

Some of Sungyeol’s answers were over the top, go to Namsan mountain!, some were more plausible, eat your Mother’s yummy kimchi~, and some were just painful, have you strip me naked so I can show you my lack of tan lines ;D.

 

It was one of our favorite games to play, because it focused on the idea of Sungyeol coming back, instead of the reality of my boyfriend being gone. It wasn’t like this was our first separation, but this one was much harder than the previous ones. It was one thing for me to be in Japan, somewhere that Sungyeol had been as well, only a couple hours off one another’s schedule.

 

This time everything was different. He was in Brazil, a country so far away that the only time I had ever encountered it was through a google images search (and that was only after Sungyeol had gotten casted in the reality show). Our time difference was massive, he was awake while I was asleep or vice versa, and if he found a free moment, I was inconveniently at a schedule. We had already been scolded - twice - by our managers for calling one another despite the long distance charges. Personally I didn’t understand the issue, it’s not like the company pays for our phone bills, and sometimes just hearing Sungyeol's voice was enough to give me strength to work harder.

 

But I played the part of the obedient member - only because I knew they would know if I disobeyed them - and resorted to texting Sungyeol all throughout the day. Even if we couldn’t directly respond to each other, it was still nice to wake up to a flurry of texts from my boyfriend;

 

It’s /really/ freaking hot today, the sun is not this unforgiving in Korea D:  
I never thought I’d miss the practice room but I do, here I get the sounds of NATURE

The bugs are so big here that sometimes I am afraid to go to sleep o.O  
I can build a fire now all by myself in just a couple of minutes!! -praise me-  
Omg I found a lizard earlier when we were filming! I named it Sunggyu :P

 

I was glad that he was having so much fun, I knew that he was excited to have the opportunity to be part of such a big reality show, but I was also aware that he got homesick easily. I was worried that the far away location would translate to constant depressing messages and wishes to come home. Not that I wouldn’t be willing to support him, but when Sungyeol wasn’t happy I wasn’t happy. The thought of him being alone in a foreign place without me to lean on was too unbearable.

 

But thankfully he was doing well; he had completely immersed himself in the experience, and he did his best to make the show as interesting as possible. Sungyeol had been so worried before leaving to go to film in the Caribbean. He had researched all the different things he might encounter; animals, landscapes, and food that he might be faced with. He read mangas about living in the jungle, and even went to the gym with the rappers to try to build up his strength. It was all actually kind of adorable, seeing how dedicate he was to the whole experience, and now it was all paying off because he was finally coming home.

 

It was almost kind of amusing how the tables had turned. I had been so consumed with worrying about Sungyeol that I hadn’t thought about how I would feel being left behind. I felt Sungyeol’s absence everywhere. No matter where we went, even though I knew he wasn’t here, I would still search for him. When we were practicing for the new title track, I would wait to feel his fleeting touch on my arm at the beginning of the choreography only to feel nothing. I would expect to see him at the window seat when we would climb into the van. I would stop by his room when I was hungry, only to remember he wasn’t inside. It happened so instinctually that I couldn’t stop it.

 

Thankfully the other members had been great. Woohyun made sure Sunggyu didn’t ride me too hard for getting distracted during practice, Dongwoo made himself available to cuddle up with me more than a few times a day, and the others were always the first to ask if I was doing well or had eaten. It was sweet that they were being sensitive to Sungyeol’s absence, I knew that they missed him too even if it wasn’t in the same way.

 

I looked down at my phone for what must have been the hundredth time in the past five minutes. Sungyeol had texted me - we just landed! \o/ - and that meant he was actually back. Not thousands of miles away, but here in Korea. Soon my boyfriend would be here, with me.

 

I wished that we could be a normal couple, that I could be waiting inside at the baggage claim, that I could be the first person he saw after walking off the plane. But this was just as good, I would still get to be by his side, and that was really all that mattered. At first the managers had tried to make me stay at the dorms and welcome him back with the rest of the members. I almost had a meltdown at that and thankfully Sunggyu was able to make them change their minds - he is Sungyeol’s best friend, they’ve both been working hard, Myungsoo will stay inside the van and the fans will never know he was at the airport. Now I was laying down flat in the back seat - this particular manager was a little more paranoid than most - to stay incognito.

 

I fought the urge to send him another text after the amount I had already sent since he had said he had landed - have you gotten off the plane yet?, will you come straight here or go to baggage claim?, isn’t it weird that we are in the same place right now?, how long have we been apart?, is it just me or is it taking you a long time to get through the airport? - I knew firsthand how crazy it was navigating Incheon even if it was already late at night.

 

Suddenly I felt bad for Sungyeol; he had texted me yesterday to tell me that he was boarding the plane for his trip home. He had been through more layovers than I ever had and was stuck in airports for almost a full day. His desire to arrive home must have been much greater than my own, based simply on the fact that he had been traveling for so long.

 

I hadn’t slept since the previous day either; waiting for any text from him to update me on his location keeping him company in between his connecting flights. We had been playing our game for almost a day straight; in Sao Paulo he wanted to go out for pistachio almond ice cream, in Miami he wanted to cuddle and watch a movie, and in Los Angeles he simply wanted to kiss.

 

I honestly didn’t care what Sungyeol decided on, as long as he could be by my side, at this point just seeing his face would be enough. So I was patient - even though it was difficult - as I waited for my boyfriend to arrive, amusing myself by flicking through the random assortment of pictures Sungyeol had shared with me over his trip.

 

Before I knew it Sungyeol was climbing into the van, talking a mile a minute with his arms loaded with bags. I tried to focus on what my boyfriend was saying, but being in his presence after so long was slightly overwhelming and it made it quite difficult to focus. Of course Sungyeol noticed my lack of response - Sungyeol noticed everything - and jokingly told me that we could save the detailed recap of his trip for the morning.

 

We couldn’t express ourselves the way we wanted to with the manager present, so we simply held hands on the drive home, the whispered I love you’s and shared looks making it a bit more bearable. Once we got back to the dorm the other members were awake and waiting for Sungyeol’s return, smothering him with welcome back hugs the moment he stepped through the door. But thankfully our members were perceptive, and they knew that the two of us would probably appreciate some time to ourselves. After solidifying plans for all of us to catch up over breakfast in the morning, they left us to our own devices.

 

I helped Sungyeol pull his bags into his room - which took more than a few trips - and finally sat down with him on top of his bed.

 

“So…” I started, pulling him closer to me. “What’s the first thing we do now that you are back from the jungle?”

 

Sungyeol grinned, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. “Sleep.”

 

“Sleep?” I repeated back, a bit surprised because that had never been one of his many responses.

 

He nodded, kissing me once firmly before pulling back. “I’m sure that you are as exhausted as I am, since you stayed awake to text me while I was travelling. I mean, we could order chicken from my restuarant cause I have seriously been craving it or we could catch up on the episodes I missed of that drama… or a thousand other things that I have missed about being home. But the thing I missed most of all was you. So right now, no scenario I can dream up beats falling asleep in your arms. Does that sound okay?”

 

I laid back on his bed, pulling him down with me. He snuggled up to my body, and I wrapped my arms possessively around his waist. He was mine, he was finally home, right where he belonged.

 

“No, it doesn’t sound okay.” I teased, kissing him again. When I pulled back I ran my fingers through his short hair, softly massaging his scalp. He let out a content sigh, burying his face in my chest as he got comfortable in my arms.

 

I kissed the top of his head and pulled the blanket up over us.

  
“Sleep sounds perfect.”


	13. pictures.

 

Myungsoo was secretive and Sungyeol was curious; they were practically destined to annoy each other about the silliest things. Sungyeol blamed Myungsoo entirely, the younger boy was supposed to be his best friend and by definition, best friends were not supposed to keep any secrets from one another. For the most part Myungsoo abided by this, confiding in Sungyeol about his doubts about pleasing the public and insecurities about his place in Infinite. And while Sungyeol had no problems being Myungsoo’s shoulder to lean on, he couldn’t help but want to know more about the private parts of the visual’s psyche, he wanted to be the person that understood how Myungsoo ticked, wanted to be able to confidently say that he knew everything about the visual.

 

His problems all started when Myungsoo was gifted that stupid desktop computer. Myungsoo used to spend his evenings lounging in Sungyeol’s room with a laptop, snooping was much easier to achieve when all Sungyeol had to do was simply tilt his head to peer over at Myungsoo’s computer screen. But during the last holiday season one of Myungsoo’s more popular fansites had given him that extremely stupid and extremely expensive Mac computer, the obnoxiously large screen only driving Sungyeol crazier. Now instead of spending his free time by Sungyeol's side, he often retreated to the privacy of his room to fiddle on his computer. What kinds of things did Myungsoo watch on that screen, what exactly did he do behind the locked door of his bedroom?

 

To make matters even worse, on Myungsoo’s old laptop there were no restrictions, so he could freely use it whenever he pleased. But on this new computer - now deemed his greatest enemy - there was a password. And if there was a password, then it was only logical to assume that Myungsoo had something on the computer worth hiding. Naturally, Sungyeol took this as a personal challenge to his sleuthing skills. The visual tried to play it off, claiming that he only put a password on the computer since he didn’t want anyone to see his progress on his photobooks.

 

Sungyeol wasn’t buying it.

 

Even if Sungyeol were to assume that Myungsoo was diligently working on the next Bravo Viewtiful, would a member seeing a couple of pictures here and there spoil the entire photobook? Part of what made Myungsoo’s photobooks so special were his essays and his little drawings, which were things he did by hand, not on the computer.

 

Sungyeol definitely wasn’t buying it.

 

There was really only thing that it could be, but even that explanation didn’t make sense. For years it had been the seven of them - hormonal, young, and inconveniently horny with little to no privacy and not too many options for relief. Porn was just a natural progression of things, because the only other options were to hook up with one another - which certain members didn’t hesitate to do - or to simply suffer alone.

 

While at first it had been slightly awkward - Sungyeol still remembered the time that the leader had tried to encourage assigning each member a specific day of the week that they would get the TV and no bathroom interruptions during a longer than normal shower - eventually they had just dropped all pretenses and decided to be honest about their desires. It was much simpler for everyone to be upfront about things to avoid embarrassing situations. Now there were certain signals that everyone understood - Dongwoo and Hoya going to the practice room late to work on their ‘dancing’ or Sunggyu and Woohyun going to work on their ‘vocals’ in the studio - and no one made a big deal out of it.

 

Therefore, it was no stretch of the imagination to assume that what Myungsoo was hiding on his precious computer was a porn stash. But if he was being so possessive about it with the passwords and vagueness and the challenging of Sungyeol's willpower, what exactly was the boy into that he didn’t want Sungyeol to know about? Sungyeol would be the last person in the world to judge Myungsoo or hold the information against him, so that meant Myungsoo himself must have been embarrassed about the kind of things he was getting off to.

 

Which ignited an even bigger question inside of Sungyeol’s mind; in the privacy of his bedroom, what kind of dirty, kinky things did Myungsoo get off to on that too large computer screen?

 

It wasn’t a debate anymore; Sungyeol simply had to figure this out. Myungsoo wasn’t as vocal or open as the other members about what they liked concerning such matters. Sure, there had been the stereotypical answers during interviews - an innocent girl with long, wavy hair - but that was really for the fans benefit. He had never confessed what he preferred sexually to Sungyeol, and that only made Sungyeol more curious to figure it out.

 

Sungyeol was seventy five percent positive that Myungsoo played for both teams. He did too much cuddling and staring at boys for there to be any other explanation, plus he didn’t seem the least bit disturbed by the shenanigans that went on between the hyungs. If anything, Sungyeol would be less surprised if Myungsoo’s appreciation of woman was more from an aesthetic level, while his physical desires were geared towards boys.

 

But even if Myungsoo were to be gay, having gay porn wouldn’t warrant such secrecy. It had to be the content of the videos, what the men were doing in them that made Myungsoo afraid of being caught, so what could it be? Some sort of fetish? Maybe something with leather, anatomically impossible large toys, and bondage.

 

Sungyeol shook his head, tossing away the idea as quickly as he had formed it; there was simply no way, he couldn’t imagine Myungsoo being the type that enjoyed hurting another person. But then what was more risque than being a masochist? A sudden thump on his bed made him turn his head, but it was only Jureumi. He picked up his cat, petting her hairless head as he thought it over. She licked at his hand, mewling at the attention and a horrendous thought popped into his head. What if Myungsoo was a furry?!

 

He jumped up with a yelp, sending Jureumi back to the floor suddenly. She hissed at him, clearly unsatisfied with the treatment and strutted to her favorite pillow in the corner to sulk. Sungyeol was a little too preoccupied to notice the kitten’s tantrum, his feet pacing the room as he pondered the subject. Myungsoo had expressed that he thought that Sungyeol would look prettier in the pink leopard onesie than the Olaf costume… a shudder went through his body as he considered the implications.

 

Sungyeol grew determined then; he couldn’t continue on any longer with these sorts of cringeworthy thoughts bouncing around in his brain. He was going to get to the bottom of this tonight, he was going to find a way to get on Myungsoo’s computer and he was going to search every single file until his worries were settled.

 

He did a quick sweep of the place for recon; Sungjong had left the dorm for dinner plans with Hwayoung, Woohyun was playing video games in the living room, and - of course - Myungsoo was safely locked away in his room.

 

Sungyeol bounded over to the couch, plopping down beside the main vocal who didn’t pay him an ounce of attention, his eyes focused on players moving around on the television screen. “Hyung, I need your help.”

 

“Mhmm.” Woohyun muttered, clearly not listening. Sungyeol, not in the mood to beat around the bush, promptly stood up and turned off the video game console. Woohyun sighed dramatically, throwing his controller down on the couch. “What the hell Yeol! I was like, ten minutes away from beating Brazil, I was up by two goals!”

 

“You aren’t even a real Devils fan, so stop looking so upset over a fake soccer match. Now I need your help.”

 

“Fuck that, I’m pissed at you for turning off my game!”

 

“Either help me or I'll slip up and confess to Gyu hyung that you recorded your last tryst in the sound booth.”

 

“But it was an accident! I didn’t think we were still recording!” Woohyun tried to defend himself but Sungyeol only rolled his eyes.

 

“That doesn’t explain why you didn’t delete the recording once you found out your mistake, or why you let me listen to it. What do you think Gyu hyung will do when he realizes that you purposely compiled his moans into an mp3 file and sent it to-”

 

“Okay, fine! There’s no need to be so defensive, damn.” Woohyun cleared his throat, trying to get comfortable on the couch. “What do you want anyway?”

 

“I need to get onto Myungsoo’s computer-”

 

“Are you stupid? If he didn’t even give you access to it, what makes you think that he would tell me the password?” Sungyeol narrowed his eyes at him, pushing at his head in annoyance.

 

“I know that and if you’d let me finish, then I can tell you my plan.”

 

Woohyun crossed his arms, giving Sungyeol a bored look. “Well I’m listening.”

 

Sungyeol looked over his shoulder - even though he knew there was no chance of anyone overhearing them - and scooted a bit closer to Woohyun. “Okay, so here’s what we are going to do.”

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Considering the lack of real strategy and impulsiveness in their plan, things had worked out surprisingly well. Sungyeol had made a show of knocking on Myungsoo’s door and telling him that he was leaving the dorm to take Jureumi out to play, so that the visual would think that Woohyun was the only person home. Then he hid in the bathroom so that Woohyun could carry out his side of the plan.

 

Once he set off the smoke alarm, Woohyun banged on Myungsoo’s door and dragged him out of his room in a hurry. Of course there was no real fire - Sungyeol’s long limbs, some hate mail, and a lighter went a long way - but the alarm and the smoke was a convincing enough emergency to get Myungsoo out of his room and the two of them out of the dorm. Woohyun pretended to call one of the managers so that they could ‘deactivate’ the alarm, taking Myungsoo out for coffee to keep him busy while Sungyeol did his snooping.

 

He shut Myungsoo’s door behind him, almost running over to the desk before the computer went to screensaver or into hibernation. Luckily he was quick enough and Myungsoo’s computer - his _secrets_ \- were right in front of him, just waiting to be discovered.

 

But after thirty minutes of searching around, Sungyeol had yet to discover much of anything really. In fact, Myungsoo’s computer was turning out to be pretty freaking boring. Finding the porn had been relatively easy - Myungsoo wasn’t the most tech savvy of people and he probably didn’t realize that Sungyeol could easily pull up all the video files with a few taps of his finger - but there had been a surprisingly low number of videos to choose from. After clicking through each of them, he had discovered exactly what he would have expected from someone like Myungsoo had this new computer debacle never arose; overly pretty boys in sappy, softcore porn. It was almost kind of funny that Myungsoo was a romantic even when it came to jerk off material. He also noted that Myungsoo - whom he was certain was a top if his bulge in those tight jeans were anything to go by - had a type for his bottoms; skinnier, pale brunettes.

 

He closed out of the last video with a sigh, deleting the playlist history so Myungsoo would be none the wiser. He almost felt… disappointed, which was ridiculous because this is what he wanted, right? To be convinced that Myungsoo was a normal, early twenties sexually repressed boy just like himself, no fetishes or taboo kinks in sight.

 

So then why did Sungyeol’s mission feel like a failure? He stared dumbly at the desktop background, some ridiculous nature scene that Myungsoo had probably shot himself during their travels. He could almost hear Myungsoo’s voice in his ear - look at how long the shadows are cast from the branches, look at how the colors change in the leaves, look at the subtle change of light in the forefront - droning on and on about photographic techniques that Sungyeol would never really care about. But even if he didn’t care about photography the way that Myungsoo did, it was safe to say that he understand why Myungsoo liked it - and more importantly - he would still listen.

 

He thought back to the various videos, the boys inside of them and all the different ways they had touched each other. Why wouldn’t Myungsoo have thought that Sungyeol could understand that as well? Even if the two of them had never done anything like that together - or with other people, being a closeted gay idol really restricted the dating pool - Sungyeol was more than open about the various sexual things he was hypothetically into. Even if Sungyeol thought that porns shot with high definition cameras and cliche scripts were outrageous, he never would have judged Myungsoo for liking them. No… there just had to be something more to this, something he wasn’t seeing.

 

He opened up Finder, his eyes looking over the favorites at the sidebar. There was an Infinite folder - which was no surprise, Myungsoo was quite the fanboy of their group - and Sungyeol clicked on it as if that would give him some sort of direction.

 

Inside of it there were six folders, one for each member of the group. He started at the top with Dongwoo - for purely alphabetical reasons - and inside there were various pictures of the two of them together. A smile came over Sungyeol’s face, Myungsoo could be ridiculously sappy, and it was actually kind of cute that he took the time to save pictures of himself with all the different members. Each new folder was practically the same, Myungsoo in various places and events with a different member. Sungyeol clicked on them randomly, scrolling through them quickly before returning to the original Infinite folder.

 

He saved his own for last - not surprised in the least when his folder appeared to be the largest of the six. Not only did he and Myungsoo take pictures together for schedules often, but it was normal for the visual to curl up next to him and snap selcas. His smile only grew wider as he scrolled down, noting the changes in their hairstyles and concepts throughout their time together. It was almost like a journey, and when he got to the end he felt a little sad.

 

Sungyeol was about to exit out and give up altogether - Myungsoo was a weird, nonsensical person and it was too detrimental to try to figure him out - when another folder caught his eye. This struck him as strange, since none of the other members had an additional folder inside of their original one. He double clicked, opening it up with bated breath.

 

His eyebrows rose as he images loaded up on the screen, the thumbnails already seeming incriminating. He selected them all, opening them up full screen in a slideshow.

 

Sungyeol wasn’t narcissistic, in fact he was probably the opposite. He didn’t spend too much time in front of the mirror, didn’t really look at himself anymore than he had to. But as the images flashed across the screen, close up shots of various body parts; teeth biting down on lips, a sliver of skin above a belt, long fingers clutching onto a thigh, a pink tongue curling out of a mouth…

 

It was all him.

 

Every single picture that came up on the desktop was of him. It was pieces of his body, in the most flattering of views, blown up in high definition as they flashed across the screen. Even his foray into crossdressing appeared, his pale chest only seeming more obscene surrounded by the red glittery dress. He was somewhat dumbfounded; all this time he had been trying to discover Myungsoo’s secret, and it ended up being himself.

 

This is what Myungsoo had been doing, saving pictures of Sungyeol, cropping them and making them look beautiful, and adding it to his private gallery. He thought about the timing of everything, about how they had leased out the second dorm around the holidays, and he realized then that Myungsoo received the computer and a private room around the same time. That’s why he got the password, that’s why he was able to do this, because there was no risk of Sungyeol discovering his secret.

 

The secret was that Myungsoo very obviously attracted to him, to an almost obsessive level.

 

In a weird sort of way, it was immensely flattering. Not that Sungyeol himself was turned on by the pictures - because that would have been weird - but from an objective standpoint, the pictures were attractive, almost sensual. Sungyeol’s breath hitched in his throat when his brain finally connected the dots of why they existed.

 

This… he was what Myungsoo was getting off to. He slumped back in the chair, the realization weighing heavily on his shoulders. There was no other explanation, there were too many photos, too meticulously connected to be a casual fixation. Myungsoo desired him badly enough to settle for staring at pictures on a computer monitor, but was too afraid to make a move on him.

 

He felt a shiver run through his body; the Kim Myungsoo, the perfectly handsome visual that boys and girls all over the world lusted over, was reduced to jacking off in front of a computer screen because of him.

 

Suddenly he felt empowered and desirable and _bad ass_ in general as he giggled at the situation. It almost made too much sense, how Myungsoo trailed after him and desired his attention, getting as close as possible without crossing that line. And then he would retreat to the privacy of his bedroom, would stare at pictures of Sungyeol and touch himself, wishing that it was Sungyeol’s hands instead of his own.

 

Sungyeol bit his lip, his eyes falling closed as he imagined it. Myungsoo, all alone in the dark with the bedroom door locked, hoping that none of the members would disturb him. His dark eyes staring heavily at the screen, looking at Sungyeol’s best parts and wishing he could touch them in real life.

 

He wondered what kind of touch Myungsoo would like; was he the type that got straight to it? Did he touch himself with a purpose, each stroke aiming to bring him closer to his end? Or did Myungsoo drag it out, his hands caressing his cock in slow, lazy strokes?

 

Sungyeol smiled to himself; definitely slow. Oh yes, he could picture it perfectly, Myungsoo’s beautiful face contorted as he moaned, his blunt teeth biting his full lip as he tried to control his volume. But he would take his time, would watch as each and every picture flickered across the screen, he would want to enjoy all the different parts of Sungyeol.

 

He knew that Myungsoo’s hands were rough, calloused from practicing on his guitar, the perfect contrast to the smooth skin of his cock. God, Sungyeol wondered just how big it was, how much of it Myungsoo could hold in his hand at once. Hell, Myungsoo could probably use two hands and still have some room left over, nice and hard and hot.

 

Sungyeol had thought about Myungsoo’s cock on more than one occasion, had stolen glances in changing rooms and had imagined how it would look like when Myungsoo was excited _for real_. Sungyeol had always thought that every part of Myungsoo was unfairly perfect, and he was sure that his cock was no exception.

 

He shifted in the chair, his own length stirring to life as his thoughts grew dirtier. He had time; it wouldn’t take long, especially with how turned on he felt in this moment, in Myungsoo’s room looking at things he was never meant to see.

 

By this point his arousal was too great too ignore, and his patience was practically nonexistent. His fingers dropped to his waistband, working open his jeans in record time. He moaned as he pulled his cock out of its confines, his fingers wrapping around his length to start up a steady rhythm. God, how many times had Myungsoo done this? Sat in this chair, watched this slideshow, and touched himself as he lusted over his seemingly out of reach group member?

 

It turned Sungyeol on so much knowing that he was mirroring Myungsoo’s actions, it was driving him crazy and making him moan in pleasure. He continued to ask himself questions in his head, trying to add details to the scenario playing in his head. What would Myungsoo sound like? Would his moans be deep and gravely, as if they were forced from his throat? Would he be quiet, just a few gasps escaping his lips when his fingers slid over the sensitive head? Sungyeol had no idea, he needed to find out, he had to find out.

 

He moved his hand faster on his cock, the pace bringing him closer and closer to his peak. His eyes scrunched tighter closed, the fantasy playing out in technicolor behind his lids. All he could see was Myungsoo, Myungsoo, Myungsoo; his hands, his cock, his face as he pleasured himself. And that mouth; his tongue licking his lips as he comes, a broken whisper of Sungyeol’s name as he comes undone.

 

Sungyeol cursed, the idea of Myungsoo moaning his name as he climaxed enough to push him into his own orgasm. “Fuck… Myungsoo.” He cried out, his free hand slightly covering his mouth as he pumped his length. By the time it was over he felt completely blissed out, his head falling back as he went boneless in the chair. He couldn’t even believe how insanely good it felt, just the touch of his hand and the thought of Myungsoo enough to put him in this kind of state.

 

 

 

A sudden flash disturbed Sungyeol’s afterglow, and he looked towards the door with hazy eyes. He visibly shivered at what he found, Myungsoo standing in the doorway, his face slightly illuminated by the computer screen. Sungyeol wasn’t quite sure what to expect, there was no real way to know what to say at a moment like this. Even now his cock was still hanging out of his pants, his come on his hand and staining his shirt. His breathing grew heavier, Myungsoo’s gaze unwavering and making him feel ridiculously exposed.

 

“How long have you been there?” Sungyeol asked embarrassed, his cheeks flushed as he was clearly caught red handed.

 

“Long enough.” Myungsoo whispered out, his eyes dangerously dark as they run over Sungyeol’s partially exposed body.

 

“W-what are you going to do?” Sungyeol questioned him nervously, licking his somewhat dry lips as Myungsoo took a few steps closer. Myungsoo reached out for the desk chair, and for a wild moment Sungyeol thought that he was going to be thrown out of it, but instead Myungsoo simply turned Sungyeol around to face him. Myungsoo’s hand reached out for his desk lamp, adjusting it so it faced the older boy. Sungyeol watched as Myungsoo turned it on, casting a bright light over his body and he was still frozen in his seat, unsure of what exactly was happening between them. “Soo.” He called out, and finally the younger boy dragged his eyes away from his body to make eye contact. “What are you doing?” He repeated, needing some sort of response from Myungsoo.

 

A curious smirk came over Myungsoo’s face and he leaned down to brush his lips ever so slightly against Sungyeol’s ear. “What does it look like?” He whispered huskily, nudging Sungyeol’s head to make him look towards the computer where the questionable photos were still displayed on the screen. “I’m adding to my collection.”

 

Sungyeol could only watch as Myungsoo walked over to his bed, making himself comfortable before lifting his camera in his hands, adjusting the lens to make sure he had the zoom just right.

 

The flash of the camera went off for the second time, capturing the beautiful mix of desire and anxiousness and disbelief in Sungyeol’s eyes. Myungsoo seemed satisfied, lowering the camera slightly to make eye contact again. “You look perfect.” Myungsoo told him honestly, his thumb swiping over the monitor as he checked the picture. “Now-” He lifted the camera up, pressing the viewfinder to his face. “Let's start with you losing the shirt, and then we'll go from there.”


	14. wish.

Sungyeol laid alone in his bed, scrolling through his SNS feed with a somewhat lazy finger. He stopped at the image of his bandmates, posing around him as he held his birthday cake.

 

“Happy birthday to me.” He whispered to himself, a frown coming across his face. Sungyeol had been pleasantly surprised when his members had presented him with the sugary treat in the middle of dance practice. They sang the customary birthday song and took a proof picture, uploading it onto Twitter for the rest of their fans to see. Sungyeol was expecting the festivities to continue, for practice to be cut short so they could go out and enjoy a dinner together, but instead Sunggyu had taken the cake from him and directed them to return to their formation to continue practicing.

 

“Stupid leader.” Sungyeol complained out loud, although the older man couldn’t hear him. He was slightly upset that practice had continued on as normal, but after returning to the dorms he was expecting to be treated to something special. But instead of showering him with attention, they had all gone their separate ways to clean up.

 

“Didn’t even offer me the shower first on my birthday, so rude.” But eventually he had his own turn, washing away the stress of the day and slipping into something fashionable, as he was sure that they would be heading out soon. But after getting dressed he was greeted by a silent dorm, not a single person going out of their way to wait for him or ask him if he wanted to go somewhere fun for his birthday.

 

He retreated to his room, clearly sulking but with no one to notice. Sungyeol thought longingly of his cake, the leader hadn’t even let him have a piece of it before going back into drill sergeant mode. Sungyeol hadn’t protested at the time, since he was sure there would be desserts later, but now he saw the error of his ways. He looked at their smiling faces in the photo, a sneer coming across his own. What had he done wrong to them to be treated so coldly on his birthday?

 

A knock sounded on his door, and his thoughts were interrupted by the sudden appearance of the main vocal and the maknae in his doorway.

 

“Sungyeol hyung! We are going upstairs to play in the other dorm.” The maknae called out, already waving goodbye.

 

“Don’t miss us too much! Even though I know you will!” Woohyun called out in a sing song voice, before shutting the door behind them and leaving the dorm to go play with the other members.

 

Without Sungyeol.

 

“What the hell is this?!” Sungyeol yelled out, slamming his pillow down on the bed in anger at the unfairness of this situation. He was deep into the throes of a mental breakdown, his mind tortured by the night’s events. “Worst birthday ever!” He grumbled, hiding his face in the mattress.

 

Phase 1; Denial

 

This couldn’t be true; surely the members had something up their sleeve besides the uncut cake and the five minute break from dance practice. Being left alone on his birthday like this… it had to be a dream, right?

 

Phase 2; Acceptance

 

Sprawled out on top of his covers, his limbs stretched out in every direction, Sungyeol let out a heavy sigh.

 

“It isn’t all about you Lee Sungyeol.” He chastised himself, staring up at the ceiling with a pout. He wasn’t a little kid anymore, people weren’t obligated to pamper him on his birthday. “Maybe for them, my birthday isn’t all that important.”

 

Sungyeol knew better than anyone how busy all seven of them were. Schedules always seemed neverending, and when there wasn’t a broadcast or interview to attend, there was always practice, practice, and more practice. Was it selfish of him to want the members to go out of their way to celebrate with him, when they were so overworked and clearly tired.

 

Maybe Sungyeol was expecting too much from them.

 

He turned to his side on the bed, snuggling up with his pillow as he moped. Sungyeol’s eyes landed on the picture on his nightstand, a selca he and Myungsoo had taken on the night of their debut together. They were smiling, their hands thrown up in V signs as they posed for the camera. A grin came across his own face as he recalled the memory, a little warmth creeping into his heart.

 

But seeing the visual’s face made him realize that he hadn’t seen Myungsoo once seen they had returned home from practice. And if anyone should be paying attention to him on his birthday, no matter how tired he may be, it was Myungsoo. He was Sungyeol’s best friend, and he should at least put a little effort into making him happy on his birthday!

 

Sungyeol jumped out of bed with a renewed sense of vigor. Even if it wasn’t necessarily fair to take out all his frustrations on the visual, it was only right that he be allowed to vent his feelings to Myungsoo. It was part of his obligatory best friend duty.

 

He stomped down the hallway to the pretty boy’s room, his anger building with each and every step. “Yah! Kim Myungsoo!” He burst into Myungsoo’s room, catching the dark haired boy in the middle of hanging what appeared to be a banner with an extremely sheepish expression on his face.

 

“S-Sungyeol? Why are you here already?”

 

Sungyeol blinked at him, his eyes looking over the room. “W-what’s happening in here?” The more he stared the more he noticed, an assortment of presents and toys in the most elegant of wrapping, streamers hanging from the ceiling and a variety of his favorite snacks laying around. “Myungsoo, did you prepare all of this… for me? For my birthday?”

 

Myungsoo tacked the other end of the banner to the wall, turning around slowly with lowered eyes. He scratched the back of his head, shifting nervously on his legs. “Umm… not really. Actually the gifts were picked out by all of the members. But I wanted to spend time alone with you, so I asked them to leave the dorm. I wanted to surprise you with all of this once I finished decorating, but you’re already here so… I guess my plan failed?”

 

Sungyeol stepped forward, wrapping up the shorter boy in his arms in a close hug.

 

“S-sungyeol? Why?” He whispered out, his arms wrapping around Sungyeol’s waist to return the embrace. The lack of response from Sungyeol only further worried Myungsoo. “I’m sorry… did I make you upset? Did I hurt your feelings?”

 

“No, silly! I thought you didn’t care about celebrating my birthday.” Sungyeol finally spoke, leaning down to rest his head against Myungsoo’s. “I thought I wasn’t important to you anymore.”

 

He moved back, looking into the visual’s dark eyes with a warm smile. “Stupid Kim Myungsoo…” He raised his hand to Myungsoo’s cheek, caressing it softly. “I like you.” He leaned forward, joining their lips in a sweet kiss. When they broke apart he was positively beaming, licking his lips as he played with Myungsoo’s hair.

 

“Me too… I love you Lee Sungyeol.”

 

Myungsoo squeezed his hands, asking Sungyeol to wait one moment as he scurried away with a happy bounce. He leaned over the counter with a lighter, using the flame to brighten the candles. He returned to Sungyeol’s side, holding a tray of cupcakes. “Happy birthday Lee Sungyeol! You didn’t get to make a wish with your cake earlier… So I prepared this for you Yeollie… I hope your wish comes true.”

 

Sungyeol looked down at the candles, a feeling of warmth taking over him. He looked at Myungsoo’s smiling face and the love in his eyes obvious and clear. The truth was that in this moment, he was entirely happy. He knew he shouldn’t ask for more but he made the birthday wish anyway.

 

I wish to spend the rest of my birthdays with you.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

A couple hours later, the other members were gathered outside of Myungsoo’s door.

 

“Hmm.” Woohyun mumbled, his ear pressed against the cup resting on the door.

 

“Don’t just ‘Hmm’ hyung, tell us something!” The maknae demanded.

 

“Shh Jjongie! Lower your voice a bit so I can hear.” Woohyun chastised, before returning to the task on hand.

 

Dongwoo spoke up then, crouching down to the main vocal. “I want to hear them too, Woohyun-ah!”

 

Sunggyu rolled his eyes, unsure of what they were doing down in this dorm spying on the visual line in the first place. “Myungsoo asked us to leave them alone anyway.” He reminded them gently.

 

“I just want to know if Myungsoo hyung’s plan worked or not!” Sungjong complained.

 

“But why didn’t Myungsoo listen to my plan, it was cute!” Woohyun wondered.

 

The leader cut off his rambling. “Shut up Hyunnie! Your plan to decorate the dorm with hearts was way too greasy anyway!”

 

“Wait? Why can’t I hear anything?” Dongwoo looked at the cup in confusion.

 

“Dongwoo hyung, the cup is not supposed to face that way.” Hoya shook his head, taking the cup from the rapper to turn it the right direction.

 

“Alright, that’s enough kids. I think we better go now before they figure out that we’ve been eavesdropping.” Sunggyu rounded them up, forcing the loud bunch of singers back up to the eleventh floor.

.

 

.

 

.

On the other side of the door inside of Myungsoo’s bedroom, the birthday boy and the visual laid in each other’s arms. The cupcakes were half eaten and gift wrapping was strewn across the room, but they were pressed up close together on the bed. Sungyeol was lying in front of Myungsoo, resting inside of his arms with a pleased expression on his face.

 

After opening presents and trying out a few of Sungyeol’s games, they ended up falling asleep in each other’s arms. And even though Sungyeol hadn’t spoken it out loud, the truth was clear.

 

His twenty fourth birthday ended up being a birthday he would never forget.


	15. blonde.

 

 

Out of the two of us, I had always considered Myungsoo to be the more visually stimulated one. The way he would just stare at me from across the room, the way his eyes would linger over my body… it was just so Myungsoo. It was flattering, knowing that the sight of me was enough to get the naughtier wheels in his brain turning, but I always thought that I was different, that I needed a more physical touch to get in the mood.

 

That was before Myungsoo was introduced to a bottle of peroxide, his forever dark locks now a honey colored blonde.

 

I couldn’t necessarily explain why a blonde Myungsoo was so attractive, it wasn’t as if his face had changed. He still had those perfectly symmetrical features that had always made my heart race. He still had the same dark eyes, still watching my every move anytime I entered a room. But now instead of black bangs hiding his eyes, there was blonde hair tousled on his head. Maybe it was just because it was something different, even if it was something as trivial as his hair color.

 

Of course Myungsoo wasn’t even aware of just how well the change worked on him. I still remember the way he looked when he shuffled into the dorm after his hair appointment, his eyes practically glued to the floor and his hands nervously twitching at his sides. The other members had immediately jumped up to get a closer look at Myungsoo’s new style, some to tease and others to congratulate, but the overall response was that it was a smart change.

 

I hadn’t been able to move from the couch, all the strength suddenly abandoning my body in his presence. It was ridiculous because we had been together for years, I had seen him in countless sexy concepts and styles, but this… it was foreign territory and it was fucking hot. I could see the way Myungsoo politely accepted the other members praise, but his eyes were on me, waiting for my opinion.

 

I knew that all it would take was for me to say I didn’t like it, and Myungsoo would be back at that salon in minutes. Myungsoo had that overwhelming need to please me, to earn my approval, and it just wouldn’t do if I disliked a fundamental part of his appearance. That need to satisfy me was what made him Myungsoo, was what made him such a superior lover to anyone else that I had ever been with. In the simplest of terms, the only way Myungsoo was happy was if I was happy.

 

Knowing that I had that kind of power over someone, let alone someone as undoubtedly beautiful and highly desired as Myungsoo, made me feel so fucking sexy because he chose to be with me.

 

That day, once I had managed to get the other members out of the equation, I practically threw Myungsoo into my bedroom, and I made sure to let him know just how much I appreciated the change in his concept.

 

That first night, the things that I did to him, the noises and moans that he had so effortlessly dragged out of me… my response to him had been so powerful that I thought that level of lust would have to fade with time. I was sure that after a few days the overreaction would lessen back to its normal levels, that I would be more mentally prepared to deal with being around him and his new look.

 

I was horribly, horribly wrong.

 

I didn’t factor in the fact that we would be promoting with a blonde Myungsoo. That meant Myungsoo singing with blonde hair, Myungsoo dancing with blonde hair, Myungsoo sweating with blonde hair. He was practically a walking sex bomb during each music show, our teasing see through outfits not helping the situation in the slightest. Factor in the fact that Myungsoo was still, well, Myungsoo… which basically meant that he was always looking for me, always trying to touch me, practically stripping me with his eyes anytime we finished a performance, and it resulted in my ultimate, unavoidable demise.

 

I had managed to control myself through our comeback stages, which I felt was an accomplishment in itself, but here we were, a full week later and I was still struggling to maintain my self control. It wasn’t helping that Myungsoo kept messing with me, wiping away my brow to make sure I didn’t sweat off my makeup, praising me for my vocals as his hand lingered over my throat, even offering to help me stretch backstage. Really, I couldn’t be blamed for reacting the way I did, not when he was being so unassumingly sexual and wrecking any and all composure I had left.

 

The moment we had finished recording my hand had found his wrist, dragging him through the winding hallways backstage.

 

“Yeollie? What’s going on?” He asked me, that voice full of confusion. The fact that he was confused, even now when my lust for him should be overwhelming apparent, just made me feel even more turned on. “Where are we going?”

 

“Just follow me.” I grunted back, navigating him through the twists and turns, purposely avoiding any of the other artists who might decide that now might be a good time to be friendly. I moved past the rookie dressing rooms, towards the less used parts of the building. I stopped abruptly, and Myungsoo almost ran into me.

 

“Yeol, what-”

 

“Shh.” He shut his mouth obediently, and I listened carefully for any noise. It was all coming from far away. “Perfect.” I opened the door in front of us, pushing him inside roughly. I followed him in, sending up a thanks that the knob actually had a lock on it. I turned back to face him, and he still looked unsure of what we were doing; his eyes innocent and his chest moving a little more noticeably since he was trying to catch his breath after running through the building.

 

I leaned back against the door, my hands immediately dropping to my crotch. His eyes widened then, the pieces finally clicking into place in his head. “But Yeol, you said we can’t-”

 

“Change of plans.” I interrupted, ignoring my own previous rules for hooking up while we were working at a schedule. Usually it was me having to fight Myungsoo off, telling him to be patient until we were somewhere more private. But today I couldn’t wait any longer, had to have to him some way right damn now.

 

Of fucking course Myungsoo didn’t need convincing, not when I was already pulling my hard length out of my pants, stroking myself lazily as I let my eyes wander over the gorgeous man in front of me. He was like a moth drawn to the flame, his feet subconsciously moving him closer to me. That pink tongue was already licking his lips, his chocolate eyes now full blown with lust. I should have known that it would only take seconds for him to catch up with me, I could already see his cock hardening through his pants.

 

“What do you want?” He asked, his voice deep and full of desire. My hand tightened on my cock when he grabbed my face with his hands. “I can’t fuck you. Not here.”

 

Despite how much I would love nothing more than him fucking me into this door, I had to agree that it wasn’t a good idea; I wasn’t exactly known for controlling my volume and we were still at a schedule. But I had to have something, had to have _him_ and I wouldn’t be satisfied until I felt his body against my own. “Get on your knees.” The hand drawing circles on my chest stopped, and his eyes flickered up to meet mine.

 

“That’s what you want?” He kissed me then, using his strength to push me harder into the door. Just when I started to get into it he pulled away, a teasing smirk on his face. “You want my mouth Yeol?”

 

“I want to look down and see a blonde head moving in between my legs, sucking me dry.” His eyebrows rose at my dirty statement, but he must have liked the thought, already falling to his knees in front of me.

 

“You’re so fucking needy… you’ll do whatever I say, won’t you?” I continued, gasping a little when Myungsoo tugged down my pants and underwear in one go. I wasn’t even sure what the hell I was saying, but the sight of him below me was doing wonders to my ego, and the commands just kept slipping out. “Don’t be shy, I know how much you want me Myungsoo. Turns me on so fucking much.”

 

A tongue slowly dragged over my slit, lapping up the precum. “I can tell.”

 

My hand shook on my cock, and I couldn’t control myself any longer. I needed that tongue, that mouth and that heat all around me. I grabbed a fistful of the bright hair, pushing his head back so I could see his beautiful face. “Suck my cock Myungsoo.”

 

He nodded slightly, my tight grip limiting his motion, and I pushed his head back down. He opened his mouth wide then, and I guided my hard cock between those pretty pink lips. I was fascinated as I watched my length disappear into his warmth, his lips stretching around my girth as I rocked my hips forward.

 

Myungsoo let out a moan when I was all the way in, his throat relaxing to fully service me. His hands rose up to clutch at my bare thighs, his fingernails poking into my skin. “Fuck.” I grunted out, pulling him back with my arm only to push him forward again. I was in complete control of the rhythm, forcing him mouth back and forth on my cock. Now I had both of my hands in that pretty blonde hair, my eyes watching him suck me in a complete trance. He was starting to moan, the sound sending lovely vibrations through my body. He swirled his tongue around my tip when I pulled his head back, forcing me to let one of my hands release his hair so I could bite down on it to drown out my own moan.

 

He was so fucking beautiful like this, his cheeks flushed with the exertion and a small bead of sweat at his highlighted brow. Just so fucking perfect, sucking my cock like there was nothing else he would rather do in this world. Each time I pushed my length into his hot mouth it was better than the last, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to last much longer like this - which was probably for the best, considering the fact that we were in a random dressing room and anyone could walk by at any moment. But if I were to be completely honest, the thrill of potentially getting caught just excited me more.

 

His eyelids started to flutter close as his grip tightened on my thighs. I squeezed my hand harder in his hair, pulling him all the way off of my length. He seemed upset at the sudden loss, his tongue still hanging out of his mouth, curling to try to reach the cock that was just out of his reach.

 

“Don’t look away from me.” I ordered, and his eyes flashed with something dangerous. “I want to see you, watch your face as you swallow my come. Do you understand?”

 

“Yes.” He answered, his voice breathless and husky. He tried to resume his task but I held his head firmly in place. His dark eyes stared deeply into me, a clear look of determination inside of them. “Let me make you come.”

 

I didn’t respond vocally, instead choosing to press my length back into his waiting mouth, not bothering to go slowly this time. I was biting so hard on my hand, trying to hold back my screams as I watched him take me so well, his eyes obediently staring at my face as I flicked my hips forward over and over again. I knew he was enjoying this, the lust was clear in his eyes and his moans were ringing through my ears. He loved to pleasure me, he always loved giving me what I wanted. He just looked so fucking nice on his knees in front of me, looked so fucking pleased with himself for sucking my cock so deliciously. I couldn’t take it, I couldn’t watch him take my cock all the way in, my tip brushing against the back of his throat.

 

“Fuck, I’m going to come. Soo, I’m going to-” I pushed in one last time, keeping his head in place as I emptied my release into his mouth. I could feel him swallowing around me, fuck I could feel him shaking and my knees started to go weak. The climax was so fucking satisfying, the waves of pleasure taking over my consciousness as Myungsoo let me ride it out. My grip relaxed on the blonde strands as I felt my body go slack, my cock sliding out of his wet mouth.

 

I watched with hazy eyes as he licked his lips, his mouth glossy and red. His hair was a fucking mess, the bright strands standing every which way. He looked like sex, as if he would like nothing more than to go for another round. He pressed a soft kiss to my cock, pulling up my clothes and helping me get situated. I stood there motionless, letting Myungsoo put me back together again.

 

He rose to his feet, his eyes lingering on my lips and I knew what he wanted. I kissed him desperately, pushing my way into his mouth so I taste myself on his tongue. His hands clutched at the back of my neck, the kiss stopping just before it grew frantic. “We should probably go.” He whispered, his lips running alongside my jaw.

 

“Yes. The others might be looking for us.” I agreed. We separated for a solid two seconds before it became too overwhelming, our lips crashing back together in another kiss. I could feel his hardness against my thigh, and I wanted him inside of me so fucking bad.

 

“Stop.” He complained, his forehead resting on my cheek. “Stop making me want things I can’t have right now.”

 

“Later.” I promised, pressing kisses on top of his light hair. “Sungjong is going to his noona’s, and I’ll ask Woohyun to go to the other dorm once we get back from our drama schedule. You can have me all to yourself and you can do whatever you want-”

 

“You’re giving me ideas.”

 

“I want you to get ideas.”

 

“Not right now, when we are supposed to be calming down.” He chastised me, but his face was still split in a grin.

 

“What?”

 

He shook his head, his dark eyes sparkling as he looked at me. “I can’t believe you broke your own rule. I’m never going to let you forget this. Wasn’t there supposed to be a punishment or-”

 

I pushed him away, not exactly remembering what punishment we had decided on and clearly not in the right state of mind to find out. I ripped open the door, making my way out of the tiny dressing room in a hurry. “This is your fucking stylist’s fault!”

 

I could hear Myungsoo’s laughter behind me as I tried to move away. Myungsoo caught my arm, pulling me back so he could whisper in my ear. “Don’t worry Yeol, I’m sure that you’ll like whatever punishment I come up with.” He walked away grinning, running a hand through his messy blonde hair in an attempt to straighten it out.

 

I forced myself to let him go first; the urge to push my own hands into his hair was too strong at the moment to keep in check if I got close to him. I groaned when an assortment of dirty images took over my thoughts, vivid reminders of exactly why his hair looked the way it did.

 

Once Myungsoo rounded the corner ahead of me I finally allowed myself to start moving back towards set, immediately deciding that whoever was responsible for dying his hair blonde should be fired for my sanity.

 


	16. eBAY.

 

Sungyeol considers himself to be a pretty intelligent guy and - without trying to sound too full of himself - the best businessman in the bunch. There’s a reason that his restaurant is the busiest, he makes sure to stop by in person, to monitor operations and take a couple pics for the fans every so often, just to keep the buzz alive.

 

It’s not that he’s greedy, or that he has a fascination with money, it’s just… nice to be able to buy whatever he wants, for himself or for his loved ones, without having to worry about the price tag. Furthermore, he knows how fickle the public can be when it comes to idols, and he seems to be constantly aware that there is ticking clock on Infinite’s popularity - not that they would ever break up, somehow he knew deep down that the seven of them would never get rid of each other, would always continue to make music even after their army days, but there was no guarantee that the fans would stick with them, would stay loyal when there seemed to be a new boy group debuting every other week. Even now their own company was grooming what they hoped to be the next big thing, his brother even signing up to be one of the members, the traitor.

 

He sighed, things like new debuts and schedules and the group’s future were out of his control, but this - this idea was entirely his own, and to say it was a success was an understatement. He straightened out the glasses resting on the bridge of his nose, his special working glasses, which only added to his good luck charms. His previous negative thoughts dissipated into nothing when he saw the clock wind down to zero; the bidding war was over and once again, he came out victorious.

 

Sungyeol patted himself on the back, sending off the confirmation e-mail to the winning bidder with an earnest smile; another fan’s day had been made and his bank account had gotten just a tad bit bigger. He wrapped up the plaid shirt nicely, tucking it into the plain cardboard box to be shipped off in the morning; Myungsoo would never know the difference.

 

Perhaps that’s why this whole thing had started, after one of the many nights crashing in the visual’s room, Sungyeol had realized just how cluttered the space was. While being the most popular member in the group had its perks, like presents literally stacked to the ceiling on Myungsoo’s birthdays, it also meant that after every so often all of the clothes and the gifts started to pile up. Myungsoo wasn’t a materialistic type of person, so things like letters and personal gifts were the things he cherished the most from the fans. Which meant that he had an abundance of very nice, lightly worn designer items that were just going to waste. Items that he barely noticed were missing, because he hardly even remembered them.

 

Which is exactly where Sungyeol came in.

 

At first, when he offered to straighten up his boyfriend’s room a bit, he thought he’d just get rid of the things that Myungsoo would never wear; pieces that had gone out of the trends or that didn’t suit Myungsoo’s style, and of course, the wretched plaid button ups. But then his business instincts had kicked in; these clothes were not only barely worn, but Kim Myungsoo’s personal possessions. Surely they had to have some worth.

 

And thus, his eBay secret identity was born.

 

He came up with a pretty over the top bio on his store page to explain how he got access to the items; naturally he couldn’t tell the truth… Hello, I’m Infinite member Lee Sungyeol who has no moral qualms about stealing my boyfriend’s, fellow idol Kim Myungsoo’s, clothing behind his back because he’d never be the wiser… enjoy!

 

No… it was more along the lines of close friend with one of Infinite’s premier managers who has exclusive access to Myungsoo’s wardrobe and personal items. It was almost too easy to sell the goods, all it took was a picture from one of Myungsoo’s fansites of him wearing the item in question, along with the date, price, and quality of the piece, and the bidding war would be on. It was crazy how much the fans wanted these items, how much they were willing to pay in order to be able to say that they owned something that used to belong to Myungsoo.

 

At first he just posted a couple small things, like a bracelet or t-shirt every week or so, but now, with his shop’s increasing popularity, he was posting a new item almost every other day. Hell, he didn’t even mind the lapse in schedules for him lately, his new online venture was keeping him plenty busy - and his bank account more than full.

 

He taped up the box, humming a cheery tune as he pondered the next item he would put up for sale; the plaid shirts seemed to sell extremely well, fans were always nostalgic for those early debut days, he couldn’t even imagine how much he’d get if he was daring enough to sell some of his boyfriend’s underwear-

 

“What are you doing in here? And why are you wearing those ridiculous glasses?”

 

Sungyeol abruptly dropped the box, a yelp of shock escaping him when Myungsoo’s voice suddenly boomed in his ear. “Er- nothing! What are you doing in here? And these glasses make me look hot and smart, thank you very much.” He retaliated, trying to shift the focus away from himself as he discreetly shut his laptop and slid it underneath the pillow.

 

Myungsoo looked at him weirdly, plopping down next to him on his bed. “This is my room, you know.”

 

“Of course I know that, that’s why I’m here. I was... waiting for you! Yes, I was waiting for you. But I didn’t think you’d be here for awhile. What are you doing back so early anyway?”

 

“Drama shoot got cancelled because of the rain. We tried to make it work but the PD didn’t like the way things looked. I’m just glad to be out of those stuffy suits, they’re the worst- especially when they’re wet.”

 

“Ah, I’m sure that you looked cute; all wet and pouty, my adorable Secretary Gil.” Sungyeol teased in a sing song voice, making Myungsoo blush. The younger boy looked around, a slight grimace on his face, peaking Sungyeol’s interest. “What?”

 

“My room looks like a mess…. weren’t the cleaners supposed to come by today?”

 

Sungyeol spared a glance at the messy closet, courtesy of his quick shuffle through for new items to sell, and did his best to look innocent.

 

“Erm… I think so! My room was pretty bad though… maybe they just didn’t have time to come by yours-”

 

“No, they were in here.” Myungsoo stated firmly, getting up from his spot on the bed to look through his closet. “I definitely didn’t leave my closet doors open, and you know I hate clothes on the floor. Someone went through my stuff.”

 

“Maybe Sungjong wanted to borrow a shirt or something?” Sungyeol tried helplessly, not wanting to admit that he was the culprit in question.

 

“No way. Sungjong would rather die than be subjected to my fashion; his words, not mine. And we both know we haven’t been the same size for years. I hate to say this but… I think the cleaning lady has been stealing my stuff.”

 

“What?”

 

Myungsoo nodded sadly, sitting on the edge of the bed with a disturbed look. “Ahjumma has always seemed so nice when I’ve met her, she even fluffs my pillows just the way I like it before she goes and sometimes she even leaves me a little chocolate candy but… over the past couple of months I’ve noticed a few things start to go missing. At first I just chalked it up to forgetfulness or just losing things when I moved from one room to another but… it’s been too many items and too coincidental.”

 

He sighed, stalking towards his closet again to shuffle all the clothes to the side, clearly looking for something in particular. “This was the final test and if it’s gone…” Myungsoo ducked down, riffling through the closet until he found the box in question. He carried it back over to the bed, opening up the lid almost as if he was hesitant to see what was inside. The moment he peered inside his face fell, a sad groan escaping. “It’s not here.” He pushed his fingers through the assorted jewelry, looking for the item in question but still coming up short. “It’s not here.” He repeated sadly, dropping the box on the bed without a second glance.

 

Sungyeol leaned over to pick it up, looking worriedly at its contents. “What’s not here? What are you looking for babe?”

 

“It was a bracelet. It was our bracelet.”

 

“Our bracelet? What are you talking about?”

 

“You know.” Myungsoo mumbled, his hands gesturing wildly. “It was old, like really old. Like debut days. It was special.”

 

“Myungsoo, you don’t even like jewelry. Was it expensive? I’m sure we can get a replacement-”

 

“There is no replacement! It wasn’t special because it cost a lot of money; it was special because you gave it to me. Remember? You bought it for me with the first paycheck we got from the company. The black leather one with the black rhinestones… you said that you saw it and that it made you think of me. It was the first gift you ever bought me…”

 

Sungyeol felt the blood drain from his body, the amount of guilt he felt now increased tenfold. He knew exactly which bracelet Myungsoo was talking about now that he had described it, and he had sold it just last week. At the time he didn’t even think about it, he hadn’t seen Myungsoo wear it in years. He felt like the worst boyfriend in the world for not recognizing its significance.

 

“Myungsoo… I didn’t even realize that you remembered that. I didn’t even think you liked it that much since you hardly ever wore it-”

 

“Well at first I thought I’d never take it off. I wanted to wear it everywhere, a constant remind of you, of us. But then I didn’t want it to get damaged or lost… with all of our outfit changes and running around for schedules… it just made me too worried. But I liked having it, knowing that it was always there. And now it’s just... gone.” Myungsoo said slowly, his shoulders hunching in defeat.

 

He looked liked the picture of sadness, and Sungyeol couldn’t hate himself more than he did in this moment. He moved in front of Myungsoo, falling down to his knees and bowing in apology. He took off the silly business glasses, feeling horrible that he had let something as dumb as boredom and desire for money hurt his boyfriend like this. “Myungsoo… I’m so sorry. Really, you should never forgive me.”

 

“Forgive you? For what?” Myungsoo asked confused, trying to pull Sungyeol up from the floor but the latter wouldn’t let him.

 

“Because it was me Myungsoo. I’m the reason your stuff… the bracelet is gone.”

 

“But the maid-”

 

“No one stole anything. I just- I thought that since you had so much stuff that you wouldn’t notice and… it wasn’t supposed to become a habit but then one thing lead to another and-”

 

“Sungyeol, what are you talking about?”

 

The taller boy sighed, bowing his head in shame. “I sold your stuff Myungsoo. You have so many nice things and I thought you didn’t need it all and it was a way to keep busy and make some quick cash. But… there’s no justifying what I’ve done. I knew what I was doing was wrong, it was your things not mine but… I still did it anyway. I convinced myself that it was okay because I used the money to buy you new things or to take you out on dates but now look what’s happened. Because of me you’ve lost something precious, something you can never get back. And it’s all my fault. I’m so, so sorry Soo.”

 

“So it was you? All this time… when my stuff was disappearing, you were giving it away?”

 

“I didn’t give it away, I sold it-”

 

“To who? The fans?” He paused, watching Sungyeol nod with a disappointed look. “That’s even worse Sungyeol! You know that most of them don’t have that much to spend… and you’re taking advantage of their love for us to make money? Money that you don’t even really need?”

 

Sungyeol cringed at Myungsoo’s words, feeling more guilty by the second. “I just thought… that we both got something out of it…”

 

“How much did you sell the bracelet for?”

 

Sungyeol stared at the floor, mumbling an answer.

 

“Yeol…” Myungsoo said sternly in warning, making Sungyeol drag his eyes from the ground to look into the angry gaze of his boyfriend.

 

“I don’t know… maybe 200,000 won?”

 

“Yeol!”

 

“Okay! 300,000 won! But in my defense, she’s been an Inspirit since Come Back Again and I know she’ll take really, really good care of your bracelet! It’s been sent to a loving home!”

 

“You are ridiculous!” Myungsoo scolded, shaking his head in disbelief.

 

Sungyeol peaked up at him, trying to judge whether or not Myungsoo was still stuck in the angry phase, or if he had moved on to exasperation. “But… you’re still ridiculously in love with me… right?”

 

“Sungyeol, you basically stole my stuff and sold it for profit without my permission! I was about to call the managers and report an innocent ahjumma for robbery, when in reality it was my own boyfriend who was the culprit!”

 

“But I had good intentions! Sort of… that should count for something!” Sungyeol did his best to look apologetic, hoping his wide eyed stare and pouty lips would distract Myungsoo into forgiving him.

 

“How did you even manage to sell this stuff without people realizing who you were?”

 

“I… might have an eBAY account…”

 

“Sungyeol.”

 

“Fine! So I have an eBAY store, it wasn’t like I planned this!”

 

“So you just so happened to set up an entire store online dedicated to selling my stuff? Accidentally? Completely out of the blue?”

 

“Well, obviously it didn’t just happen one day but… I put a lot of work into this! I had to come up with a legit cover story and use an alias so people wouldn’t realize it was me, and then I had to figure out a way to get proof shots of you wearing the stuff so my customers would know I was legit. Getting pictures was no joke! Do you know how hard it is to level up on those fansites to get HDs? If I had one won for every time I left a ‘Myungsoo oppa is so hot’ comment, I’d be rich!”

 

“You sound so remorseful.” Myungsoo spoke with clear judgement, making Sungyeol pout for real.

 

“I am sorry Soo! I would’ve never sold any items that I knew were special or important to you on purpose! It was honestly a mistake!”

 

“And what about all the other items?”

 

“Well… it’s not like you noticed that they were gone-”

 

“Sungyeol!”

 

“What? I’ve been at this for like six months and you just now caught on!”

 

Myungsoo couldn’t help but giggle, it was hard to stay angry when Sungyeol managed to look so guilty and so cute all at once. “You are shameless.”

 

“Shamelessly in love with you.” Sungyeol winked, making Myungsoo roll his eyes.

 

“Being greasy isn’t going to save you! You are in so much trouble and it’s going to take a lot more than batting your eyelashes at me and saying sorry to get back in my good graces!” Myungsoo said firmly, doing his best to look menacing.

 

“What do you want me to do? Grovel? Take you on a shopping spree? Wear my sexy business glasses and nothing else in bed? Because those things can be arranged! Very easily! I can get naked right now!”

 

“Nobody is getting naked and you are definitely not getting laid in the immediate future.” Sungyeol looked legitimately put out at that, his nose scrunching cutely at the thought of going without. “And for starters, you can begin by deleting your eBAY store.”

 

“Delete it?! But- I had like an 100% approval rating! And the graphic artist I wanted just replied to me to talk about redesigning my webpage, do you know how hard it is to get her? She only works with the top stores!”

 

“Sungyeol in what universe would I allow you to continue running that store and selling my things? Did you even consider listing your own stuff?” Sungyeol’s silence was enough of an answer, and Myungsoo had to rub his temples.

 

“Well it’s not like I wouldn’t-" Sungyeol started, twirling his hair around his finger as he tried to come up with a justifiable excuse. "But your stuff is much more valuable than mine! Your like... the most popular member! Your Infinite's L! And my boyfriend! What did you do right in a past life to manage to get this lucky?”

 

“The answer is still no-”

 

“Not even a little-”

 

“No.”

 

“But now that you know what I’m doing you can just pick the items yourself-”

 

“I said no!”

 

“Why are you so stubborn?!”

 

“Are you serious?!” Myungsoo said in disbelief.

 

Sungyeol narrowed his eyes, upset that his tactics weren't working. “I’ll remember this on your birthday next year when your precious new seasons of your favorite anime is available.”

 

“Technically speaking, you owe me at least half of whatever profits you’ve earned so far.” Myungsoo stated matter of factly, and Sungyeol immediately backtracked.

 

“I haven’t said I’m sorry in a while, I should say that again.”

 

Myungsoo sighed, reaching down to hold Sungyeol’s cheeks. “You’re lucky that you’re so cute.”

 

“I guess I am, huh?” Sungyeol grinned, sitting up on his knees to get close enough for a kiss. Myungsoo obliged him, pulling his chin up to drop a short peck on his lips.

 

“You know you drive me crazy, right?” He mumbled between kisses, eventually pulling Sungyeol off of the floor altogether to drag him on top of him.

 

“Mhmm.” Sungyeol agreed, throwing his arms around Myungsoo’s neck, getting situated in between his legs.

 

“And you know that you owe me a lot more than a bracelet to make up for what you’ve done?”

 

“I think now is a good time to remind you of my naked with glasses only suggestion…” Sungyeol whispered into his ear, his teeth biting down on the lobe.

 

Myungsoo laughed, running his hands down Sungyeol’s slender back to settle on his waist. “You know, I can’t decide if I should let you suffer a little longer, or if I should just go ahead and give you your punishment now.”

 

“If that means what I think it means, then I will definitely accept my punishment like a good little boyfriend. You should definitely put me in my place, show me who’s the boss…” Sungyeol teased, starting to rock down onto Myungsoo to show his growing interest. “You know I like it when you get all authoritative and order me around.”  
  
“Really? Because nine times out of ten you never do what I tell you to do.”

 

Sungyeol shrugged his shoulders, nuzzling into Myungsoo’s neck. “What can I say? I’m a wild card. And maybe sometimes I don’t understand what the word no means…”

 

“So basically you’re saying that you stop listening when you don’t hear what you want?”

 

“That’s not true! I always listen to you baby!” Sungyeol said defensively, although he didn’t sound too convincing. “It’s just… sometimes what you say isn’t as great to hear as other times… Sungyeol don’t touch me like that in public, Sungyeol don’t send me dirty pics during schedules, Sungyeol don’t sell my stuff to unsuspecting strangers online-”

 

Myungsoo spanked Sungyeol’s ass, earning a yelp from the taller boy who couldn’t stop giggling. “What? Like I said, some things you say are better than others! I much more prefer the Sungyeol take me deeper, Sungyeol ride me harder-”

 

“You really are desperate, aren’t you? Look how hard you’re working, trying to make me fuck you.” Myungsoo pushed his hands underneath the waistband of Sungyeol’s jeans, grabbing a handful in his grip.

 

“I don’t mind working hard for something I really want. And believe me when I say that I really, really want you.” Sungyeol confessed, kissing Myungsoo nice and slow, pulling out all of his tricks to try to convince him to play along. “We’ve got the dorm to ourselves, we could be naked in less than a minute-”

 

“While that might be true-”

 

Not liking the serious tone in his boyfriend’s voice, Sungyeol immediately interjected. “Myungsoo, this is the perfect opportunity for the two of us to just skip over the fighting part and get right to the making up… you know what they say about make up sex.”

 

“That it’s something that only honest boyfriends who legitimately feel guilty deserve?”

 

“Why are you playing so hard to get! I said I was sorry, Soo! I’ve begged, I’ve pleaded, I’ve even offered to make amends with my hot body! What more could you want?”

 

“For you to actually feel regret! And-” Myungsoo playfully tossed off Sungyeol off of him, laughing at the scandalized expression on his boyfriend’s face. He reached underneath the pillow, pulling out Sungyeol’s laptop. “Let’s just say that none of my fun parts are going anywhere near you, until you delete that online store. And I am much better at computers than you, so don’t even think about trying to set up shop under a different username because I will find out and the consequences will be so much more severe.” Myungsoo stated firmly, leaning down to kiss his pouting boyfriend on the forehead. “I hate to break it to you babe but your little scheme, is officially over.”

 

Myungsoo walked away with a smirk, pausing in the doorway to regard Sungyeol’s crestfallen expression. “You know the sooner you get to deleting your account, the sooner you can have-” He motioned to his body cheesily, “-all of this.”

 

Sungyeol shook his head, mumbling his protests as he opened up the computer. “You’re lucky you’re hot, cause your seduction techniques are totally subpar.”

 

Myungsoo rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest with his stare boring into Sungyeol. “I’m waiting.”

 

“You’re seriously going to watch me do it? It’s like you don’t trust me at all!”

 

“And I wonder why that is!”

 

“...I guess you have a point. Just remember this, the next time you want to go to one of your fancy American restuarants, you’re footing the bill.”

 

“Quit stalling and start deleting!” Myungsoo stood patiently waiting, not moving from his post at the door.

 

Sungyeol sighed, turning back to his computer screen, his fingers flying over the keys as he logged into his account. He made a show of clicking around the site, aggressively hitting the buttons to make a point, but Myungsoo was unfazed. Finally he clicked the last button, finalizing the shutdown of one of his most prosperous endeavors.

 

“There. Happy?”

 

“Very. Now you can either sit there and mope, or you can join me in the kitchen.” Myungsoo offered, a smile on his face.

 

“I’m not even hungry though…” Sungyeol said slowly, his mouth twisted into a frown as he watched the fruits of his labor disappear in front of his eyes.

 

Myungsoo leaned forward, reaching out to tuck Sungyeol’s long bangs behind his ear. “Who said anything about eating food?” He brushed his lips over Sungyeol’s ear lightly. “I know how badly you’ve been wanting to me bend you over the kitchen table…” He started enticingly, bunching his fist in Sungyeol’s shirt to pull his boyfriend’s lips to his own. The kiss was sensual, their lips moving against each other with clear interest. When they finally separated all thoughts of eBAY and fans and money had dissipated into nothing. “And don’t forget the glasses.” Myungsoo whispered, dropping one last peck to his lips to seal the deal.

 

Sungyeol watched him walked away with dazed eyes, his body moving to follow as if it was on autopilot. He grabbed his glasses off the end table, pushing them on his face while he licked his lips. Even if he had lost the stupid business venture, what he had to gain with Myungsoo was so much more valuable.


	17. exhibitionism.

 

Myungsoo wasn’t like all the others who had to pretend in some interviews during some comebacks, he honestly liked all of Infinite’s songs. They were his style, the melodies light and the voices always in harmony, and he often found himself playing their music in the background while relaxing in the dorms.

 

Nothing’s Over was his favorite, he liked songs where they got to have fun on stage without having to worry about impressing fans with their charisma or portraying a cool image. He enjoyed the songs that he got to shed the burden that was L, and sing his heart out as Myungsoo. That was also the music video where Sungyeol got to shine, and that made it so much more satisfying and memorable in his mind.

 

He didn’t think that anything would be able to top it, but that was before Man in Love came along. Not only was the song infectiously peppy, he was also given permission to do fanservice with his favorite target.

 

The one and only Lee Sungyeol.

 

Looking back on it, management probably should have given it a second thought before handing Myungsoo the reigns to ‘interact’ with Sungyeol on stage. He liked being able to give his boyfriend a little bit of attention in public, a small way of reminding other’s who Sungyeol belonged to, even if the majority of people thought it was all for show.

 

But it was anything but, Myungsoo already had a hard enough time staying away from Sungyeol during their performances, so when he was given the okay to play with his boyfriend on stage, he might have taken things a little too far.

 

In the beginning it started small; there was a moment when six of the members were posing while Woohyun sang his big lines towards the end of the song. Sungyeol was right within his reach, just an arms length away. At first Myungsoo started with cute poses, then it was casual touches, and now it was-

 

“Seriously, Myungsoo?” The taller boy was pacing backstage, dabbing his sweaty forehead with a towel, diligently preserving his make up.

 

The younger boy thought it might be safer to play dumb, although his hazy gaze and clear appreciation practically gave him away. “What?”

 

Sungyeol glared at him. “You know exactly what! Myungsoo, you basically stripped me on stage.”

 

“It was only your jacket… you still had your shirt on underneath.” Myungsoo stated matter of factly, but that didn’t seem to appease his boyfriend.

 

“Myungsoo, that’s not the point. There’s fanservice and then there’s… I don’t know, foreplay?” Sungyeol chastised him. Myungsoo moved his eyes down to the floor, his hands nervously twitching in his lap.

 

“I thought you would enjoy it… I like it when you pay attention to me on stage. It makes me perform better when I get your support.” Myungsoo said softly, his legs swaying back and forth as he sat perched on the edge of the counter.

 

“It’s not that I don’t like it… you’re just being too obvious. It’s hard for me to maintain my composure, my image when you are touching me.”

 

“But why? Why can’t you just let it show, every once and awhile? The fans like seeing us together… and I don’t hide how much I like it when you touch me.” Myungsoo questioned, his lips pouting cutely.

 

“There’s a fine line Myungsoo. We promised the others that if we got together that we would be subtle. You have to be more careful from now on.” Sungyeol explained.

 

“So you’re worried about the fans?”

 

“More like worried about the other members. Don’t you notice the way they look at us when we do things like that on stage? I feel uncomfortable when you touch me in front of them, I don’t want them to see.” Sungyeol trailed off, his hands pulling at his suit jacket as he tried to straighten it out.

 

The leader popped his head into the dressing room and he gave them a smirk. “And here I thought I’d catch you guys in the middle of something after what I witnessed out on stage. We need to go monitor the recording, I noticed a couple mistakes in the dance break on the playback.”

 

“We were just talking, and now we’re done.” Sungyeol said for the both of them, giving himself one last glance over in the mirror before disappearing out of the room. Sunggyu followed Sungyeol without another word, leaving the visual alone slouched against the counter.

 

Myungsoo told himself that Sungyeol’s dismissal of the conversation didn’t bother him, that his boyfriend’s words had come from a place of concern, not embarrassment. But deep down he knew that it wasn’t the truth.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

It was another day but the same thing, just on a different music show. Woohyun’s part is coming up and Myungsoo’s walking to his place but with hardly any of his usual enthusiasm. Normally his heart would be bursting, the anticipation almost killing him as he waited for the excuse to fondle his boyfriend. But instead he forced himself to stay still, his eyes resolutely on the ground instead of the beautiful boy right in front of him. It was difficult to not to look at Sungyeol, he looked so pretty in the brightly colored suits with his almond colored hair. But at this point, even looking at him would be considered a temptation, so he forced himself to focus on the choreography, and the rest of the performance went off without a hitch.

 

They collected another trophy, all smiles for the camera and their fans. But inside Myungsoo was troubled, he felt constricted and unable to the express himself the way he wanted. He glanced over to Sungyeol, who was dancing happily near the end of the stage with the maknae, holding up an Inspirit support banner. Myungsoo stayed off to the side by himself, a part of what was happening but not really. He sang along to the lyrics inside of his head, bobbing his head to the music as their winning song played.

 

A pair of arms wrapped around him, but the height was all wrong for who he was longing for. He appreciated the gesture nonetheless, holding onto the rapper’s forearms. “Dongwoo hyung?”

 

“Just smile for a little while longer, we’ll be home sooner than you know it.” Dongwoo told him, putting his hand up in a V sign for a fan with a camera in the front row. Myungsoo followed his lead, posing for pictures until Hoya came over to tug them towards the center. The members formed a circle like always, hugging each other as the fans cheered for them. Sunggyu did his obligatory whispers of praise, before they broke away to do their final bow towards the crowd.

 

Everyone was still energetic by the time they made it backstage, and Myungsoo moved quickly to grab his things, not really in the mood to joke around. He took the backseat in the van, letting the others crowd around the car windows to wave and pose for the fans as they drove away. Myungsoo closed my eyes, leaning his forehead against the cool window as they made their way home.

 

Myungsoo felt a head rest against his shoulder and he peeked open his eyes to see a blonde head of hair. Dongwoo was always the best at reading the member’s moods, always there to comfort the boys when they were feeling down. It was no surprise that he made a point to sit next to Myungsoo on the ride home, offering a bit of support.

 

“Are you and Sungyeol fighting?” Dongwoo asked, his voice barely audible. Myungsoo looked around, Sungyeol was directly in the row in front of him; he wasn’t sure if this was the best time to discuss the way he was feeling. “They all have their headphones in… they can’t hear anything and they aren’t paying attention to us anyway.”

 

Sure enough, when Myungsoo looked at Sungyeol he was focused on his phone, his head nodding along with his music as he played one of his games. “Come on, you can talk to me.”

 

“We aren’t fighting… at least I don’t think so.” Myungsoo muttered.

 

“You guys barely spoke to each other at the schedule, and you haven’t been doing your fanservice like normal.” Myungsoo tried to protest, but Dongwoo cut him off. “I’m right next to you guys in the formation, I can see everything. It seems like you are avoiding each other, you didn’t even looked at him during any of the recordings.”

 

“Not because I don’t want to!” Myungsoo said seriously, a sigh of frustration leaving his lips. “I can’t look at him, not without wanting to talk to him or interact with him.”

 

“What’s wrong with that? You guys are dating.”

 

“Not publicly. It’s… safer this way. If we are used to being careful and keeping our distance, then there will be less chance of rumors.”

 

Dongwoo shifted next to him, thinking it over in his head. “That might be true to an extent, but you don’t seem to be happy with the sudden change. Did you guys decide to tone it down together or-”

 

“It doesn’t matter. It’s for the best. I’ve never been that good with boundaries, and I’ve been pushing things too far lately. It’s my fault that it came to this; I made him feel uncomfortable and this is the result.” Myungsoo bit his lip, the sadness starting to overwhelm him. “I don’t really want to talk about it anymore hyung, no offense.”

 

“That’s okay, Myungsoo.” Dongwoo told him honestly, reaching out to hold his hand. “Don’t be too upset; I’m sure that things will return to normal eventually. Just give it a little time.”

 

Dongwoo slipped his own earphones in, turning on some music to give Myungsoo a bit of space. “I hope you’re right. I hope it gets better.” Myungsoo whispered, even though he knew no one could hear him.

 

“Aye, Jungryul hyung! Can you stop at the store? I feel sick, I need some medicine.” Sungyeol spoke up suddenly, leaning forward to nudge the manager driving.

 

“Yah, wait until we get back to the dorms.” The manager answered his eyes still focused on the road.

 

“But my stomach already acting weird now, the car is just going to make me feel more nauseous! If I get sick and throw up on someone then you can’t get mad at me!” Sungyeol whined.

 

“Hyung, he’s just going keep complaining the whole drive if we don’t stop.” Sunggyu said tiredly from the passenger seat.

 

“Fine. But no one gets out of the car. I’m just going to be a couple of minutes.” The manager said decisively, pulling over at the next convenience store they passed by. The other members took at their earphones, curious about the detour in their ride home.

 

“It’ll just be a minute, hyung is buying some medicine for Sungyeol.” Sunggyu explained to the rest of the guys.

 

Myungsoo hesitantly reached up to touch Sungyeol’s shoulder. “Are you alright?” He asked worriedly, his eyes running over Sungyeol’s body for any signs of weakness.

 

“Not yet.” Sungyeol responded, turning around in his seat to face Myungsoo. “But I will be.”

 

“Jungryul hyung will get your medicine, just wait a moment-”

 

He was cut off by the sudden press of Sungyeol’s lips, the kiss startling not only him, but the other guys around him.

 

“What the hell?” Woohyun uttered from his spot beside Sungyeol, but that didn’t stop the lanky boy from continuing to kiss the visual. There was an assortment of groans in the van, but Sungyeol refused to let that deter him. In fact, in a sudden move of boldness, he climbed over into the backseat, much to the dismay of the other boys not being kissed.

 

“Sungyeol, what are you doing!” Hoya complained, now crowded into the window since the back seat could hardly fit four fully grown men. Dongwoo didn’t seem to be bothered by the sudden addition of the choding, watching the two of them kiss with a smile on his face.

 

Myungsoo finally pulled away, looking up into Sungyeol’s shining eyes questioningly. “I don’t understand?”

 

“I heard what you said to Dongwoo hyung. I’m sorry for being stupid, I shouldn’t have ignored you. I just was worried about what the others would think of us, but that’s no reason to not pay attention to you Myungsoo. I care about you so much, and I’m sorry that I made you question that because of my behavior.”

 

“Are they really going to have a heart to heart in front of us right now?” The maknae asked, a haughty tone in his voice.

 

“Yes we are Jjongie, and you have nowhere to go so you can just deal.” Sungjong scoffed, but stopped complaining nonetheless. “Actually, now that I have all of your attention, this would be a good time to let all of you know that me and Myungsoo are going to step up our game tomorrow. We’re going to put the rest of your so called ‘couples’ to shame. After our performance, the fans will have no choice but the sail our ship.”

 

“Seriously? You’re crushing my legs right now over fanservice?” Hoya said exasperatedly.

 

“Okay kids, that’s enough. Hoya, move up to the middle row with Woohyun and Sungjong. Sungyeol, stop kissing Myungsoo. If you’re feeling sick it might be contagious, and the last thing we need is two members falling ill.” Sunggyu directed them from the front seat, making the others rearrange their positions in the car.

 

“I’m not sick! I just needed an excuse to get Jungryul hyung out of the car so I could make up with Myungsoo.” Sungyeol rose a hand to Myungsoo’s nose, bopping his nose cutely. “And now we can make out all we want.” He said cheekily.

 

“Yah! I’m sweaty, I want to get home so I can take a shower, and we are making unnecessary pit stops for your libido? Are you kidding me?” Woohyun said frustratingly.

 

“It wasn’t for my libido! I had to fix things with Myungsoo, would you rather us be awkward around each other?” Sungyeol retorted.

 

“He’s got a point.” Sunggyu murmured, and Woohyun turned on him in surprise.

 

“Hyung, how could you side with him?” The main vocal whined, glaring at the leader.

 

“Because things are better when no one in the group is fighting, and that includes Sungyeol and Myungsoo! Now could everyone kindly shut up, hyung is coming back now.” The leader ordered, and the other boys obediently quieted down. Jungryul climbed back into the van, passing back the medicine to Sungyeol.

 

“Don’t you want to say thank you?” Woohyun prompted, and Sungyeol sheepishly did so. Jungryul went to start the car, but Woohyun stopped him. “But hyung, shouldn’t Sungyeol take his medicine now? Didn’t he say that riding in the van upset his stomach?”

 

Sungyeol glared at Woohyun, who was staring at him smugly. “He’s right, take it now Sungyeol-ah, then we can go home.”

 

Myungsoo could see the pain on Sungyeol’s face, the pink Pepto-Bismol now his boyfriend’s worst enemy. The other members looked amused, waiting patiently to see Sungyeol suffer. “I’ll pour it for you hyung.” Myungsoo took the bottle from Sungyeol’s hands, twisting off the cap hurriedly.

 

Sungyeol’s lips were almost comically turned down in a frown, the grimace unmistakable on his face. Myungsoo turned his back to the others, mouthing trust me to Sungyeol. He faked pouring the pink liquid into the medicine cap, Sungyeol’s eyes brightening as he caught on to Myungsoo’s scheme.

 

“Make sure you fill it all the way, so he gets the full dosage.” Woohyun encouraged, the two boys sitting next to him laughing quietly.

 

Myungsoo smiled at Sungyeol, giving him a wink. “Open up.” He knew that Dongwoo could see that they were faking it, but judging by his pleased smile, the rapper would keep quiet.

 

His boyfriend pretended to swallow - complete with the gagging noises at the taste - and Myungsoo put the medicine away, just barely holding in his laughter at the victorious look on Woohyun’s face.

 

The car started up again, and Jungryul pulled out of the parking lot to continue home. The other members went back to their business, and Sungyeol turned to Myungsoo with a grin. “Thank you. I seriously hate that stuff, I probably would have gotten sick if I had to drink it!”

 

“I know. I remember.” Myungsoo whispered back, and his boyfriend leaned in closer to him.

 

“You’re always so kind. Always going out of your way to make things easier for me. Whether it’s something silly like avoiding taking medicine or something big, like pretending to be okay with my stupid fanservice restrictions… you always do whatever you can to make me happy. I should have talked to you about how I was feeling in the beginning, instead of exploding at you the way I did.”

 

Myungsoo shook his head. “But if that’s the way you feel-”

 

“I shouldn’t let what other people think dictate the way I feel. I was nervous that we would make the other members uncomfortable or raise suspicion, but I was just being paranoid. The other members will protect us and our real fans will support us no matter what. We should have fun while we perform, we shouldn’t have to hold back. You were right; we do better on stage when we support each other. So tomorrow, let’s promise to do our best okay?” Sungyeol couldn’t kiss him the way he wanted to at the moment, so he settled for pressing his lips into the back of Myungsoo’s hand.

 

“Okay.” Myungsoo agreed, returning the kiss on Sungyeol’s hand. The both of them had silly grins on their faces, glad that the misunderstanding was put behind them.

 

The rest of the drive went quickly, the two of them relaxing into seat, their hands held together tightly on top of their knees.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

Woohyun wandered into Sunggyu’s room after his shower, collapsing on the leader’s bed with tired limbs. “What are you doing hyung?”

 

“Just monitoring today’s performance.” Sunggyu responded nonchalantly, his eyes focused on his computer screen.

 

The younger boy rolled over, getting closer to Sunggyu to see better. His eyes narrowed at the text, recognizing the name of a fansite. “Then why are you watching a fancam of Myungsoo instead of the broadcast?”

 

“I was thinking about what Sungyeol said yesterday… but I didn’t see them do anything extreme during the broadcast. I looked at a couple fancams of him, but I still didn’t notice anything outside of the norm. I thought I’d give some of Myungsoo’s a try. I don’t know… They looked so pleased with themselves afterwards, I was sure they had pulled something off…” The leader trailed off, his eyes following the visual on the screen. He clicked towards the end of the video, right before Woohyun’s lines near the end. They watched intently, but during the posing moment Myungsoo and Sungyeol only shared a longing glance.

 

Sunggyu paused the video, a confused expression on his face. “I don’t get it, that’s nothing compared to Myungsoo stripping him on stage.”

 

“Well, maybe you are looking at the wrong part. Have you watched any of the fancams all the way through?” Woohyun questioned and the leader shook his head. Woohyun reached over to the touch pad, clicking for the video to restart from the beginning.

 

The two of them watched with their eyes glued to the screen, just waiting for something to happen. And when the moment came, their mouths fell open in shock. Woohyun even rewinded the video a bit to make sure his eyes were deceiving him. It wasn’t the clearest view, but it was unmistakable, right when Sungyeol had stood in front of Myungsoo towards the end of Hoya’s rap, Myungsoo had leaned in and-

 

Sunggyu jumped up from his bed, ripping open his door to begin his search for the visual. “Myungsoo! You did not just kiss Sungyeol on the cheek during a public broadcast! You are in so much trouble!”

 


	18. 24.

 

 

There are many times that Myungsoo sits back and seriously contemplates his life choices - like falsely thinking he could pull off the persona of L, starring in a drama that required him to wear a horrible blonde wig, agreeing to destroy his image in their latest reality show - but right now, he is having some major issues with the direction his life has gone.

 

Unfortunately, he was getting a first hand lesson in understanding that famous saying - the road to hell was paved with good intentions - and now as he watching his best friend get manhandled by the other members, he couldn’t help but wish that he had thought his plan through a little more before introducing it to the rest of the group.

 

It wasn’t that Myungsoo was a possessive person - he watched as Sunggyu leaned in slowly, his lips stretched into that smug grin as his pretty hands cradled the brunette’s face, brushing his lips softly over Sungyeol’s full cheeks - okay scratch that, he was definitely a possessive person. He wanted to push Sunggyu away from his best friend, wanted to remove the leader from the room entirely, but he couldn’t exactly do that; after all this had been his idea.

 

Really, most of Myungsoo’s current situation was out of his control. While some might think that living in the same place as Sungyeol would ensure him time with his best friend, that wasn’t exactly the case. Before there had always been individual schedules, reasons that they couldn’t see each other as much as they wanted. But these past couple years in particular had been worse than normal - going on the road for months with the world tour, then filming a reality show as soon as they returned to Korea, and now Sungyeol was busy with his role in the drama. Myungsoo wasn’t bitter or anything, he was extremely proud of Sungyeol for working so hard to further his acting career. But with all the script issues, reshoots, and plot changes that had happened with the drama, shooting schedules were more than demanding - they were hell.

 

The worst part was that Sungyeol was doing all of this on top of his commitments to Infinite - first there was Last Romeo, and more recently, Back. It seemed like they were always in the studio, working on vocals and tightening up the choreography. Then once the summer concert was announced - seven full days of performances, not counting at the rehearsals for group songs and solo performances - things really got crazy. Myungsoo knew that deep down he should be thankful, that there were other groups that would kill to be busy with projects - and he hadn’t forgotten the days in the beginning when they all prayed for someone to give them a schedule so that they could have a chance - but at the end of the day, he just missed his best friend.

 

Spending time with Sungyeol was that one thing that calmed Myungsoo down, he was the person that not only gave Myungsoo comfort, but gave him perspective on situations. In a sense he humbled Myungsoo, made him remember that at the end of the night he was still a normal human being, despite the unnatural lives they led during the day as celebrities. But the huge increase in obligations and the sudden inability to spend that quality time with his best friend left Myungsoo feeling completely lost.

 

So naturally he was more than a little peeved when he wasn’t able to cling to his best friend in the few moments they were around each other. It was as if suddenly all the members wanted a piece of Sungyeol, wanted to interact with him on stage and steal his attention backstage. He couldn’t even get five minutes alone with Sungyeol these days without someone coming along and demanding his attention. And it wasn’t like he could hold that against Sungyeol either; he knew how important it was for his best friend to be liked, to be needed by the other members and not just him.

 

Myungsoo couldn’t exactly explain why, but lately it seemed that the members had become much more touchy with Sungyeol - whether it was Sunggyu leaning over to rest his head on his shoulder, Hoya wrapping at arm around his waist, Sungjong pulling him into a back hug, Woohyun fondling his chest on stage, and worst of the worst, Dongwoo kissing his cheek for all the fans to see - Myungsoo was officially at his breaking point. This didn’t even make sense, Myungsoo was the unofficial boyfriend, the person that the fans shipped with Sungyeol, and yet all the other members were touching him!

 

He tried to write off the kisses - yes, plural - with Dongwoo; he told himself that those were for show, as Hoya deemed the two of them Infinite’s Romeo and Juliet, and were purely for the fans, a way of saying thank you for helping them win another music show. But still, seeing Sungyeol cover his lips in the bright red lipstick, watching him chase Dongwoo around the stage to plant a kiss on both of his cheeks, puckering up with no sense of shame, made Myungsoo extremely uncomfortable. It only became worse when Dongwoo returned the favor to Sungyeol, making Myungsoo start to become skeptical of Dongwoo’s so called ‘innocent’ skinship.

 

On top of that, a recent interview brought his attention back to the Troublemaker days, when Sungyeol had blushingly denied really kissing Sungjong when Myungsoo had asked him. He could never see too clearly because he was busy with outfit changes and makeup retouches backstage during their concerts, plus Sungyeol’s long curly wig did quite the job of covering up their faces. But then Sunggyu had revealed on broadcast crazy stories, things like Sungyeol actually dreaming of kissing Sungjong, and he had watched the way his best friend had blushed and panicked at the admission, and his skepticism reached new levels. That night, courtesy of Youtube, he found out exactly why Sungyeol was blushing - seeing the kiss from multiple angles of fancams showed him just how dedicated his best friend and the maknae were to pulling off the concept for the special stage.

 

Which brought him back to the present; how was it that he was Sungyeol’s best friend, he was the one Sungyeol was closest to, and he was the one who the fans thought paired the best romantically with Sungyeol, and yet, he had never even kissed him?! The closest he got was in Couple’s Game, but that didn’t really count since pepero and paper were in the way. Sungyeol had kissed him on the head, and at the time that had made him feel victorious, but obviously now the stakes had been raised. He wanted his obligatory fanservice and attention from his supposed boyfriend damn it, and he wouldn’t stop until he got it!

 

Well, technically, this could be one of those times where people could point out that Myungsoo was the one sole person in the group that had two ‘boyfriends’. And while he was told to show Sungjong attention from time to time, it just wasn’t the same as when he did things with Sungyeol. Myungsoo could watch Sungjong literally mount the nearest member and fell nothing, but if Sungyeol did the same he would be finding a reason to pull him away. He told himself that this was because Sungyeol was actually his best friend in real life, not just his companion for the fans, but as time went on and his jealousy grew, he stopped finding reasons to deny it anymore. But he couldn’t exactly demand that Sungyeol pay attention to him - he couldn’t demand Sungyeol to do anything, the boy was as stubborn as they come - so Myungsoo continued to suffer in silence and long for the good old days like Man in Love, when he was allowed to fondle Sungyeol on a weekly basis to his hearts content.

 

It wasn’t until he was hanging out with the other members, discussing Sungyeol’s upcoming birthday, that the idea popped into his mind. His musings and explorations on the internet had alerted him to how ‘weak’ things had been between him and Sungyeol lately. If even the fans were noticing the distance - and Sungyeol’s tiredness which hurt his heart on multiple levels - then something had to change. That was when the idea started to plant in his head, growing and growing until he had the revelation of just how the members were going to celebrate Sungyeol’s birthday and give back to the fans.

 

At first, when he was adjusting his camera lens and watching Sungyeol’s oh so precious reaction to their ‘surprise’ - of course they had told him the plan before the camera starting rolling, Sungyeol was on edge during his birthday ever since Dongwoo’s crying prank and Woohyun’s failed cake incident - Myungsoo was convinced that he was a genius. He had deemed himself the camera man - not that any of the other members would argue - and after a brief explanation of what they were doing and why they were recording, from Woohyun of course, always the one who felt obligated to play host, Hoya had been the one to start things off. In theory, this should’ve been perfect.

 

24 kisses for Sungyeol’s 24th birthday.

 

With six members to work with, that equated to each boy giving Sungyeol four kisses each. Was it over the top? Of course, but they liked doing special things for their fans, and after Myungsoo had reminded them - oh so subtly - that they hadn’t done anything close to this level since Couple’s Game and that other boy groups these days were upping the intensity and frequency of shipping moments on stage, they all agreed to join in. So now he was filming like the dutiful best friend - and mastermind - as the birthday boy enjoyed the attention.

 

The rule was that you could kiss Sungyeol where ever you wanted, you only had to do it the right number of times. Unsurprisingly, Hoya had kept things pretty chaste; planting all his kisses on Sungyeol’s hand. Sungjong followed Hoya’s lead in terms of riskiness, choosing to kiss the top of Sungyeol’s head. Myungsoo reminded himself to stay calm when Dongwoo stood up next, but his worries were for nothing; the rapper placed kisses on both of Sungyeol’s knees and elbows, Dongwoo’s amusement at his choice of location clear even after he finished. They were more than halfway through, twelve kisses down with no problems, and Myungsoo metaphorically patted himself on the back for dreaming up this whole thing in the first place.

 

But his self praise stopped fairly quickly after the leader had moved closer, the first kiss enough to make warning bells go off in Myungsoo’s head. Was it really necessary for Sunggyu to look at Sungyeol that way, to hold him so delicately? He started off safe enough, two kisses taken care of with both of Sungyeol’s hands, then one on his forehead, but then his last one had been on Sungyeol’s cheek, and Sunggyu looked entirely too happy with himself for making his best friend blush. Myungsoo was fuming, his hand holding the camera starting to get sweaty. Then he realized who was left.

 

Sungyeol had always been a little closer with Woohyun, had said on more than one occasion that he was the hyung that he looked up to the most, but lately their friendship had definitely been rubbing Myungsoo the wrong way. It didn’t help that Woohyun was in the drama with Sungyeol, that he had a legitimate reason to spend so much time with Sungyeol, that he had an excuse to pull Sungyeol away from Myungsoo. But of course he couldn’t stop them from hanging out, from rehearsing together and running lines to try to be the most prepared for their schedules as possible. But right now, when Sungyeol’s cheeks were still red from a kiss from Sunggyu’s lips as Woohyun stared him down, Myungsoo was starting to have some serious regrets about letting their friendship flourish.

 

It was like an accident, Myungsoo didn’t want to watch and yet he had to, he had to see what stunt Woohyun would pull. The main vocal was notorious for pushing the envelope, for being the most daring when it came to doing things for the fans, so it was no surprise that he felt his stomach twisting nervously.

 

“Looks like it’s time for the main event.” Woohyun joked obnoxiously, making a show of stretching as he moved closer to Sungyeol. He turned the Myungsoo’s camera with a coy expression. “I thought that we should give him spankings instead of kisses, but this kid is too fragile to handle it.” Woohyun looked back at Sungyeol, winking at him. “Try not to blush too much more Sungyeollie, or you’ll end up looking red in the video.”

 

The other guys laughed - all except Myungsoo - and Sungyeol playfully held up a fist to Woohyun in a pretend punch. Woohyun grabbed onto the fist, jerking Sungyeol closer to make him slightly lose his balance. He had a cocky smile on his face as he kissed the top of Sungyeol’s hand, before turning it over to place one on the inside of his wrist. Myungsoo had never even thought about that spot being intimate, but watching Woohyun place his lips there now made him want to scream in frustration.

 

“Myungsoo-yah, make sure you get a good angle so the fans can see properly.” Woohyun called out over his shoulder, making Myungsoo want to smack that smirk off of his face. But instead he nodded obediently, moving closer with the handheld video camera. “Now where should I go for the last two? Anywhere in particular that you want Sungyeollie? It’s your birthday after all.”

 

“Yah! Stop kidding around and get it over with already. You’re making our Inspirits wait too long.” Sungyeol said playfully, flashing a gummy smile at the camera.

 

Woohyun moved behind Sungyeol, wrapping his arms around him in a back hug. “You’re right, we can’t have our girlfriends waiting too long, can we?” He rested his chin on Sungyeol’s shoulder, turning his head to place another kiss on the curve of his jaw. Sungyeol flinched, the light touch somewhat ticklish on his skin. Woohyun grabbed his face, turning it this way and that to decide where to plant his last kiss.

 

Myungsoo’s fingers gripped the camera harshly, wanting to shout at Woohyun to just do it and get the hell away from his best friend. He bit his lip, forcing himself to keep quiet as he watched the scene unfold in front of him. Woohyun finally put him out of his misery, laying a sloppy smack on Sungyeol’s left cheek. Sungyeol immediately pushed Woohyun away, wiping off his face with a disgusted look as Woohyun laughed.

 

Myungsoo felt a pat on his knee, and turned to see Dongwoo’s smiling face. “It’s your turn Myungsoo-yah!” He locked eyes with Sungyeol across the room, the burning already starting in his chest.

 

“Oh- okay.” He said nervously, letting Hoya take the video camera out of his hands, doing his best to ignore the smug expression on the rapper’s face.

 

“Last but certainly not least.” Hoya teased, and Dongwoo patted his butt in encouragement.

 

“Go on! It’s time for our visual line to finish things up for Sungyeol’s birthday!” Dongwoo said warmly, his cackle loud in the room. Woohyun and Sunggyu moved away from Sungyeol’s side, making room for Myungsoo to sit next to Sungyeol on the bed.

 

Now that he was here, Myungsoo could barely think. This had all been his idea, his overall goal was exactly this; to have an excuse to be close to Sungyeol, to kiss him in front of the others and make a statement. But now that Sungyeol was smiling somewhat shyly and looking down at his knees, he couldn’t force himself to move. He felt the softest brush on his thigh from Sungyeol’s fingertips, it was subtle, probably wouldn’t even been seen on the camera because of the angle they were sitting at, but it was enough to get Myungsoo’s mind back on track.

 

“Happy birthday.” Myungsoo whispered, his eyes running all over the perfection that was Sungyeol’s face. His best friend’s smile got wider, his brown eyes almost beckoning Myungsoo to do something.

 

He shifted a bit closer, reaching his hands out to hold Sungyeol’s face. He heard a few cat calls from Sunggyu, but he ignored them; only having eyes for Sungyeol in that moment. He started out safe, placing a quick peck on the softness of Sungyeol’s black hair. Myungsoo tightened his grip, pulling the taller boy’s face down to press his lips to his forehead. He could feel Sungyeol’s cheeks move as he grinned harder, and he placed an affectionate peck on the tip of his nose. Sungyeol laughed, a pretty sound that made Myungsoo feel warm all over.

 

Myungsoo tilted Sungyeol’s chin back up, staring straight at him, the large brown eyes focused right back at him. Sungyeol blinked, his long lashes prominent before he opened his eyes again, waiting for Myungsoo to make his final move. In reality he had only been close to Sungyeol for seconds, probably less than a minute since he had sat down next to the boy. But time felt exaggerated when he was with Sungyeol, each second ticking by slowly as he looked at his best friend. Sungyeol licked his lips, probably subconsciously but it was enough to make Myungsoo lean forward, his eyes zeroing in on the small sliver of tongue that peaked out from those pink lips, and before he knew it his eyes were falling closed, and his lips were kissing Sungyeol’s mouth.

 

It only lasted for a second, the touch electrifying him and he pulled back from the kiss, slightly surprised by his own compulsion. The guys around them were laughing and clapping, clearly amused that they had taken things that far. Sungyeol looked just as shocked by his forwardness, his eyes getting comically bigger as he stared at Myungsoo’s mouth. Hoya stepped closer with the camera, zooming in on Sungyeol’s face.

 

“So how does it feel birthday boy? Do you have anything to say?”

 

Sungyeol was positively red all the way to his ears, his hand trying to cover his smile. He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself before he turned his attention to the camera. “Ah… I- well, after being surprised by the members for my birthday, my heart is still fluttering.” His eyes cut over to Myungsoo, who hadn’t moved an inch from his spot, his heavy gaze still boring down on Sungyeol. “I guess I just want to say thank you to all the Inspirits who wished me a happy birthday, I know my 24th year will be a good one if all of you stay by my side. I love you!” He blew a kiss to the camera and Hoya motioned for all the guys to come into the frame. He turned the camera around, letting all the members wave and say goodbye, before ending the recording.

 

The boys took a second to say happy birthday to Sungyeol once again, teasing him for being blushy and cute during the kissing game. But Sungyeol’s eyes were still glued to Myungsoo, looking at the younger’s boys flushed cheeks and nervous body language. Sunggyu and Woohyun took possession of the camera so they could load it onto the computer - probably eager for the chance to trend on SNS again - leading the rest of the boys out of Sungyeol’s room to continue on with their evening.

 

Myungsoo and Sungyeol were still sitting on top of the latter’s bed, bodies leaning in a little too close with a clear awkwardness in the atmosphere. The click of Sungyeol’s bedroom door was the only noise heard, the two of them staying silent as they gazed upon each other. Myungsoo was nervous, probably more nervous than the first time he went on a plane, or walked into the recording studio, or performed in concert in front of hundreds of fans or-

 

“What was that?” Sungyeol asked, his voice soft, barely audible despite their close distance.

 

“What?” Myungsoo was distracted by Sungyeol’s lips, how pink they were, how soft they had felt. Watching those lips form words this close, made his concentration disappear.

 

“Myungsoo.” Sungyeol touched his hand resting on the bed, getting his attention. “You just kissed me.”

 

“Everyone just kissed you.” Myungsoo defended, suddenly feeling shy. “24 kisses for your 24th birthday… that was the plan.”

 

“But you kissed me. No one else kissed me on the lips… not even close.” Sungyeol pointed out, his voice sounding unsure even though he was speaking the truth.

 

“Yeah…” Myungsoo admitted, shrugging his shoulders. “I did.”

 

“But why?” Sungyeol’s large eyes were fixed on him, begging him to give him some sort of explanation that would make this all make sense. “It’s not like you to be impulsive…”

 

“What are you trying to imply?” Myungsoo whispered, his dark eyes staring defiantly back at Sungyeol.

 

“You did it on purpose.” Sungyeol accused him, his eyes flickering down to Myungsoo’s lips. “You didn’t kiss me on the lips to one up the other guys, or to please the fans… you kissed me because you wanted to.” He shifted closer, his knees brushing against Myungsoo’s. Sungyeol bit his lip, his teeth gleaming in the low light of his bedroom. “You’ve always wanted to, haven’t you Myungsoo?”

 

Suddenly the atmosphere was changing, the awkwardness dissipating as another kind of tension formed in the room. Myungsoo thought Sungyeol looked beautiful, thought that he wanted Sungyeol to keep shifting just a bit closer, thought that he’d like nothing more than for the two of them to not leave this room, this moment together.

 

“So what?” Myungsoo was not even sure where his confidence was coming from, all he knew was that Sungyeol was staring at him, licking his lips as if the thought of having Myungsoo was as delicious as a piece of candy, Sungyeol’s lips already bubblegum pink and begging to be kissed again. “Does that change anything?”

 

“Only everything.” Sungyeol murmured, a grin taking over his face as he moved closer to Myungsoo, his knees now pushing against his thighs. “So what are you going to do now Myungsoo?” He lifted his hand, pushing Myungsoo’s black hair back, keeping a hold on it as he tilted his face up. “Are you just going to keep staring at me, holding back like you always do, or are you actually going to do something about this? About us?”

 

“What do you want me to do Sungyeol?” Maybe he was crazy, but having all of Sungyeol’s attention on him, feeling the ghost like touches and staring at the coy smile... Myungsoo was practically melting, especially after being deprived for so long. And while an overwhelmingly large part of himself was screaming that he should grab Sungyeol by the collar, pull him close and kiss him until he was breathless, another part of him took a perverse pleasure in making Sungyeol wait, enjoyed watching Sungyeol’s eyes linger on his face, his desire and his need for Myungsoo suddenly clear.

 

The truth was that as much as Myungsoo craved Sungyeol, it wasn’t always apparent that it went both ways. But right now, seeing this kind of look in Sungyeol’s eyes, seeing his best friend stare at him in a way that he didn’t look at any of the others, made him feel exhilarated and powerful and good. “Tell me.” He encouraged, feeling bold enough to rest his hands on Sungyeol’s thighs, tightening his fingers on the rough fabric of his jeans. “Tell me what you want.”

 

“You.” Sungyeol whispered, his eyes glittering dangerously. “Kiss me again, but this time-” He leaned forward, brushing his lips against Myungsoo’s ear as his voice dropped to a husky tone. “Do it for real.”

 

Myungsoo finally let his desire break free, letting go of his last fleeting remnants of self control. He grabbed the back of Sungyeol’s long neck firmly, pushing his fingers into the thick dark hair. And then they were moving together, no hesitance, no games, no distractions. The desire was mutual, the need to touch and feel and taste was shared by the both of them, and there was no holding back any longer. It was just the two of them, tangled up together on top of Sungyeol’s bed, mouths pressing feverishly against one another as they kissed. And this was much better than earlier, he could feel the taller boy’s body pressed up against his chest, one of his arms wrapped tightly around his waist. Sungyeol ended up in his lap, both of his hands cupping Myungsoo’s cheeks as the kiss grew deeper. And god, Myungsoo had never really thought about Sungyeol’s tongue but right now he was determined to feel every single inch of it, his own licking into Sungyeol’s mouth with no sense of restraint.

 

For a brief moment he wondered why the hell he hadn’t done this sooner, because being with Sungyeol this way - feeling those delicate hands touch his face and that soft mouth caress his own - was so astronomically better than anything else that they had ever done, that he was positive that he could never give this up. When their lips broke apart Sungyeol let out the softest sounding moan, and Myungsoo was sure that he could never get enough of hearing it.

 

They stared at each other for a moment, the eye contact intense and unwavering, their mouths only a few inches apart. Sungyeol’s mouth was open and panting, his lips glistening and Myungsoo felt his desire spike. He lifted his hand to Sungyeol’s face, letting his thumb run over the other boy’s hot mouth. “What do you want from me Sungyeol?”

 

Sungyeol smiled around his finger, his tongue flicking out just a bit to lick the tip of Myungsoo’s thumb. “All I want-” Sungyeol wrapped his arms around Myungsoo’s neck, his head leaning down to whisper in Myungsoo’s ear playfully, “is for you do that again.”

 


End file.
